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This Pizza Place Rightfully Charges $1,000 For A Side of Ranch
Austinist ^ | Mar 21, 2014 | Aleksander Chan

Posted on 03/21/2014 3:44:15 PM PDT by nickcarraway

Let's just get this out of the way: Putting ranch dressing on your pizza is disgusting and foul and you should feel ashamed of yourself if you desecrate the sanctity of the holy union of bread, tomato sauce, and cheese. For shame!

Anyway, Cane Rosso's in Dallas is doing it right and "charging" customers a sweet grand for the privilege to eat their pizza WRONG. Owner Jay Jerrier explained to Eater the type of people he usually encounters ordering this pghlemy subtance. It's weird, it always seems to be young, college-age girls that ask for it.

Of course, when they caught wind of his joke giant bottle of ranch, the Annals of Reddit reacted as they often do. Everybody [on Reddit] seems to assume we're the worst people in the world, like how dare they tell me how to eat my pizza! Dude, it's a joke. Relax.

But really, it's just a damn Yankee thing.

It was pretty funny how people did take it really seriously and were super offended. I guess it's the Midwest. They love them some ranch.

Also, it's his restaurant. He can do what he wants.

Well you know, at Cane Rosso we really try — and you gotta take this with a grain of salt — we try to stay authentically Neapolitan, but we're also the same guys who are putting brisket on pizza, and bacon marmalade. But we really try to stay far away from the kind of Midwest-American tradition. No chicken, no ham, no pineapple. I think for the most part, again, take it with a grain of salt, Cane Rosso is more about restraint and balance where we're not taking it to extremes. Ban ranch dressing on pizza.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Food; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: bossy; gauche; pizza; ranchdressing
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To: Rusty0604

I’m of the mind that the best pizza is a thick crust with pepperoni, pineapple, jalapenos and double-cheese, then topped with lots of crushed red peppers and the crust is brushed with a garlic butter sauce. Yum!


61 posted on 03/21/2014 5:01:36 PM PDT by Two Kids' Dad (((( ))))
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To: bgill

No you CAN”T eat your pizza any way you like it.

“Tucked deep in the Affordable Care Act is language requiring all restaurants with at least 20 locations to list nutritional information alongside each and every item on their menu.

That edict is now creating headaches for small business owners across the country, particularly pizza chains.”

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/02/25/obamacare-menu-headache/


62 posted on 03/21/2014 5:04:52 PM PDT by Rusty0604
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To: Psalm 144

Hey now, don’t be badmouthing my Mom’s jello salad. She didn’t use marshmallows, though - just a little mayo on the side.


63 posted on 03/21/2014 5:07:20 PM PDT by dainbramaged (Don't tell me, I'll tell you.)
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To: cripplecreek
Yeah it seems pretty common for people in these parts to order ranch

Then it's definitely your parts since over here ranch isn't even mentioned on the pizza menus....unless it's with the hot wings.......LOL!

64 posted on 03/21/2014 5:12:59 PM PDT by Hot Tabasco (Was Occam's razor made by Gillette?)
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To: nickcarraway

Sorry, I’ll be taking my business to a pizza joint that believes “the customer is always right” (because I am).


65 posted on 03/21/2014 5:13:11 PM PDT by eclecticEel ("The petty man forsakes what lies within his power and longs for what lies with Heaven." - Xunzi)
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To: Blue Ink

Real NY Italian pizzarias serve hot pepper with pizza. Not my thing, but the flake dispensers are almost as common as garlic or parmesan grinders.


66 posted on 03/21/2014 5:20:54 PM PDT by dangus
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To: DugwayDuke

“Telling construction workers how to eat their pizza is normally not a good idea.”

Um, that’s my point. When the hard-hat guys come in, he’s a coward. When the college girls come in, he’s a bully. He’s like a half pepporoni/half sausage pizza, except he’s a half coward/half bully.


67 posted on 03/21/2014 5:21:03 PM PDT by Blue Ink
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To: All

It’s usually pregnant girls that put salad dressing on Pizza.


68 posted on 03/21/2014 5:35:35 PM PDT by Rodney Dangerfield (Has any President in history sunk to such a level of self-flattery & validation-seeking?)
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To: Rusty0604
"Californians love their ranch too."

Uh.....that's not ranch....

69 posted on 03/21/2014 5:39:26 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Qui me amat, amat et canem meum.)
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To: DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis

Somewhere around here is a little hardcover Jello recipe book from the early ‘70s....my mom ordered it through the mail way back then. It’s full of women in their groovy “hostess” outfits serving those blobs to guests as though they’re the most delicious thing going.


70 posted on 03/21/2014 6:08:14 PM PDT by CatherineofAragon ((Support Christian white males---the architects of the jewel known as Western Civilization).)
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To: Inyo-Mono
"Good for them! A hot dog should only have yellow mustard and pickle relish on it."

For me, it's mustard/chili/onion.

I saw a girl put mayo on a hot dog once....it was pretty nauseating.

71 posted on 03/21/2014 6:10:38 PM PDT by CatherineofAragon ((Support Christian white males---the architects of the jewel known as Western Civilization).)
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To: Joe 6-pack

LOL


72 posted on 03/21/2014 6:15:44 PM PDT by Rusty0604
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To: hoagy62

I think the last time I had jello of any kind was at least 65 years ago.


73 posted on 03/21/2014 6:21:51 PM PDT by dalereed
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To: PoloSec

Ranch dressing = calf slobber.


74 posted on 03/21/2014 6:31:57 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam
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To: nickcarraway

Reminds me of a burger place in Austin during my college days that charged extra for no cheese on the burger.

I’m not a fan of Ranch on pizza, but it’s my favorite dip for fries & I usually end up putting some on my burger too.


75 posted on 03/21/2014 8:11:44 PM PDT by TropicanaRose
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To: WVKayaker

That sounds good! I know the pineapple is popular. We must have around 30 pizza places in our town. I’ve most of them at one time or another. They are all edible though, some better than others. It’s hard trying to pick the best.

Good luck on place!


76 posted on 03/22/2014 6:14:59 AM PDT by caver (Obama: Home of the Whopper)
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To: BenLurkin
Ask for Ketchup instead.

When I first started working in northern Quebec, I was quite surprised that almost everyone there put ketchup on their pizza. There is already tomato sauce on it. But then again, those folks put ketchup on just about everything.

77 posted on 03/22/2014 6:28:16 AM PDT by Dartman (CDN PM Stephen Harper may not be perfect, but we don't have to be ashamed or embarassed of him.)
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To: dfwgator

hmm...never seen such a thing before.....sounds like it might be good....especially if really cheesy in the middle....


78 posted on 03/22/2014 1:25:52 PM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis
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To: F15Eagle

thanks for the tips..... :-)


79 posted on 03/22/2014 1:26:46 PM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis
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To: CatherineofAragon
Did it look like these?


80 posted on 03/22/2014 1:34:44 PM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis
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