Image: Dilbert.com
Posted on 12/29/2011 9:32:50 AM PST by Pharmboy
Image: Dilbert.com
We are nearly at the end of 2011 and another year of mayhem behind. We will be judging our 2011 Non-Predictions and trying to dream up some new ones for 2012 in the next fortnight or so but this week we have been able to get some long needed admin done.
With it came a realisation that even if the financial industry is suffering, the creative management community has been in full swing dreaming up new terms and phrases to camouflage the blindingly obvious.
The evolution of ‘management speak’ means some phrases die and some survive and flourish. TMM really doesn't know what determines the success of one term or phrase over another other than, as with the arts, adoption and patronage by the most respected in the field. TMM hope that this year’s rash of newcomers all die off naturally but we would like to help with a shove into their deserved obscurity.
(Excerpt) Read more at businessinsider.com ...
One that drives me crazy now hot just in business but everywhere is the word ISSUE. There are no problems anymore, only issues.
“Think outside of the box”....there’s one that should have died by now.
I hate emails that end with “please advise”.
Yep...that was good for a few months back in ‘88.
A lot of my clients use “reach out” and it gives me the creeps every time I hear it.
I don’t “reach out.” I may “call” or “contact” or “get in touch with” - but never “reach out.”
To kill the “reach out” phrase at your office in a fun way is to “accidentally” replace it w/something racy such as:
Email #1: “Jill reached around to Jack and smoothed things over for us.”
RE: Email #1: “LOL! I would have loved to seen that!”
RE:RE: Email #1: “Oops! I meant ‘reached out’”.
You have an issue with the term "issue."
Time to reach outside of the box.
Where I am there are no problems, only ‘opportunities’.
I BLANKING HATE the phrase “Shout Out”!
‘Houston, we have an issue.’
‘Houston, we have an opportunity’ lol!
Clinton diplomacy - is now ‘our partners’ - not quite allies and not quite enemies.
‘letters of understanding’ - not quite treaties and not quite declarations of war.
Them’s the ‘dynamics’.
Sergeant, we are not out numbered we are just in a target rich environment.
Ahh, corporate buzzwords. In my time in government we used to make fun of the management types who co-opted already tired biz-speak and re-purposed them (sorry, another one!) for their own use.
A few cringe-worthy ones, mercifully on their way to the graveyard:
“Boots on the ground”
“Low-hanging fruit”
“Make me an offer”
“out of pocket” or just “OOP”
Bell Telephone advertisement
Saying that Anthony Perkins (Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho”) was crazy would be judgmental. Saying he had “issues” is accepting, tolerant and not psychologically harmful. It shows obvious sophistication and deep understanding kon the part of the speaker. It’s also a way the speaker has of differentiating himself from those grubby Bible clinging, gun toting nasty people.
SHOUT a little bit softer now.
I hate how they refer to sales pitches as “offers.”
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