Vicar went to hospital with potato stuck in bottom (says "fell on vegetable while naked")

telegraph.co.uk ^ | 11/13/08 | Staff

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

The clergyman, in his 50s, told nurses he had been hanging curtains when he fell backwards on to his kitchen table.

He happened to be nude at the time of the mishap, said the vicar, who insisted he had not been playing a sex game.

The vicar had to undergo a delicate operation to extract the vegetable, one of a range of odd items medics in Sheffield have had to remove from people's backsides or genitals.

Others include a can of deodorant, a cucumber, a Russian doll – and a carnation.

[SparkyBass]

Potato gun misfired?

[Delmont]

This could be an explanation of how hoof and mouth disease got started or even the Irish Potato Famine, one rotten potato can spoil the whole damn bunch,

[xsmommy]

I've seen metal fence stakes, tent stakes etc. do that.

he says, warming to his topic....; )

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

Maybe "Mythbusters" would tackle this one.

"Been there, done that, girlfriend." ;)

[clamper1797]

Poo-tato.

and I thought my response (hashbrowns) was bad ... good job

[IrishPennant]

No, see....he shut the blinds first, which slapped a certain, ahhh, appendage, causing him to fall backwards.

[MomofFive]

Rectum? Dang near killed him!

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

he says, warming to his topic....; )

Just so long as he doesn't break out the anatomically correct dolls, this time. That's all I ask. ;)

[CajunConservative]

Vicar in a Tutu - The Smiths

[ERJCaptain]

Thanks for ruining my day!

[null and void]

KRYTEN There's - there's - there's some kind of heartbeat up ahead, and it's beating at an incredible rate!

[KOCHANSKI leaves her seat and stands between LISTER and the CAT to see further up ahead]

CAT You mean there's a heart out there with no body? No wonder it's beating so fast.

[As Starbug hurtles along the vent, the shape of a large rat slowly resolves out of the darkness. In rears up and squeals with fright as CAT deftly swings Starbug around it]

LISTER Heyyy!

[CAT laughs happily and shoots glances around the cockpit for approval]

[A second rat slides out of the dark up ahead, facing away from the rapidly approaching Dwarfers and sniffing at the ground, unawares. With its pilots distracted the 'Bug sails into and jams in the rear-end of the rat, which squeals as it is lifted off its paws with the inertia, then carried down the vent with the force of Starbug's engines]

[The cockpit is in darkness, and the quick thudding of a heartbeat can be heard. Grimaces paint the faces of all four]

HOLLY I hope we don't get stopped by the cops. They don't like it when you're rat-arsed...

[null and void]

Don't ask!

[Vaduz]

Now that is funny very good

[xsmommy]

he is googling illustrative materials, even as we speak....

[tet68]

Going to hospital took the starch right out of the good vicar.
At least it wasn’t a sweet patato, then the head line would have been:

Stripped Vic jams yam!

[manic4organic]

There once was a British vicar
who hung curtains nude tanked up on liquor.
Whether on whiskey or rum
a spud leapt up his bum
and now he makes chips in his knickers.

[CholeraJoe]

I watched last night and they debunked the “You can’t polish a turd” idiom.

[visualops]

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

I watched last night and they debunked the “You can’t polish a turd” idiom.

NO PICTURES! NO PICTURES!!! ;)

[MinuteGal]

By a strange coincidence, I just finished reading "The Vicar of Potatofield" by Oliver Goldsmith.

Leni