Posted on 06/10/2005 6:01:56 AM PDT by Fierce Allegiance
TheBigB has given me the go-ahead to put up this weeks OFST. Thanks, B! Hurry back!
Last week we had some rough spots, so R-Q-TEK86 had the following ground-rules suggestion for this weeks thread:
By entering this silly thread, I promise to…
Honor the spirit of silliness. Eat Spam, eggs, Spam, Spam and Spam. Not ask to see any of Jersey Republican Biker Chick’s body parts. Stand on my desk, flap my arms and make sounds like a chicken. Spew milk through my nose at something ArGee posts. Make at least one blonde joke. Post a joke that makes people groan. Ponder the question “Is ‘Civil Engineer’ an oxymoron?” Try to solve the mystery of who ctlpdad really is. Make a reference to AYBABTU. Disavow everything that Howard Dean stands for. Post a “Pearls Before Swine” cartoon (Dog Gone only). Make the guy in the next cubicle wonder what’s so funny. Post a picture of my favorite refreshing beverage. Quack like the Aflac duck. Not post gratuitous cheesecake or beefcake pictures. Tell JimWforBush a joke about engineers. Make a pun. Use “series” instead of “serious” and “hugh” instead of “huge”. Ask r-q-tek86 if all architects are gay. Stand facing the back of the elevator on the way back from lunch. Post a picture that made me snort the first time I saw it. Do a silly walk. Make an obscure reference to “Young Frankenstein”. Ignore this thread.
I'm not a fan of tat's either, but that is good.
Thanks for the ping. :-)
Good!
I'll keep looking too.
Abandoned Isle
A retired corporate executive decided to take a vacation. He booked himself
on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life until the
boat sank. He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies,
nothing, only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks
her, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"
She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when
my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with
you."
"Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material I found
on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the
bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus
tree."
"But, where did you get the tools?"
"Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south side of the
island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed I found if I
fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable,
ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the
hardware."
The guy is stunned.
"Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few minutes of rowing, she
docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls
out off the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite
bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the
rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead,
dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not
much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?"
"No. No thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut
juice."
"It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I have a still. How about a
Pina Colada?"
Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down
on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman
announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you
like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom
cabinet."
No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in
the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a
hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.
"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically
positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit
down next to her.
"Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been
out here for a really long time. You've been lonely. There's something I'm
sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing
for all these months?" She stares into his eyes.
He can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean......" he swallows excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes "..... I can check my e-mail from here?
OMG fruits in the burgh!
"Why does Michael Jackson love twenty four year olds...
....Because there's twenty of them!"
It took everything in my power not to start cracking up out loud to that one.
WARNING: Huge time-waster.
I finally did win, though.
I'm not having much luck here. There's a lot more cartoon cheesecake out there than there is beefcake. But I'm not giving up yet! :-)
I am, therefore I think...I think.
Did you see this thread yesterday? It is a DU poll about FR.
LOL!!!
AWESOME!!!
Yeah,
Seems that way doesn't it...
BTW,
Q: What's the best way to kill a man?
A: Put a naked blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one.
<img src="http://dribbleglass.com/subpages/strange/braille.htm"
my first attempt to post a photo and it only posts the link. Can someone explain to me how to post a pic?
That's easy. The six pack. Then toss 3 beers to the girl and she will choose you!
How about "I knew we should have taken that left turn at Albuquerque!" (Thanks to Bugs Bunny)
Close your tag with a right carat - >
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