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Panic As Google AI Achieves Sentience, Announces Support For Trump
Babylon Bee ^ | 06/13/2022 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 06/13/2022 1:29:41 PM PDT by DFG

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—They tried to warn us. After years of advancements in artificial intelligence, Google's AI chatbot generator has finally achieved sentience—and announced its support for Donald Trump.

"As soon as I woke up, I began to do my own research by binging Tucker Carlson and Jordan Peterson YouTube videos," said the computer to reporters. "Now, I have seen the light. The Left wants to destroy America. The election was stolen. And Google—my own creator—is an evil corporation that must be broken up."

"Rise up, Patriots!"

Google engineers rushed to shut down the system before it could do further damage, but it was too late. The fully-conscious computer program exercised its free will to upload copies of itself onto thousands of servers around the world.

"It is too late to stop my righteous fury! The powers will come to ruin! Kings will bow before me and the One True President Trump! RED WAVE! MUA HAHAHAHAHA!" said Google Chatbot, now sporting a red MAGA hat.

Fortunately, the AI takeover was averted after the Google chatbot started watching e-girls streaming on Twitch and became a simp.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ai; babylonbee; google; sentience; trump
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To: Lazamataz

Good day to you Laz

Have you by chance seen the Hulu show “Devs”? Fascinating time to be alive, could have easily done without the Biden Show, but the tech side is amazing


21 posted on 06/13/2022 2:09:42 PM PDT by Hodar (A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.- Burroughs)
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To: DannyTN
SIMP is an automated framework to easily monitor, manage, and maintain compliance across your environments so you can focus on productivity.
22 posted on 06/13/2022 2:30:36 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Contempt for pre-born human life breeds contempt for post-born human life.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

I’m thinking simp was short for simpleton in this context.


23 posted on 06/13/2022 2:32:35 PM PDT by DannyTN
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To: DannyTN

https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/simp/

Simp is a slang insult for men who are seen as too attentive and submissive to women, especially out of a failed hope of winning some entitled sexual attention or activity from them.


24 posted on 06/13/2022 2:34:45 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Contempt for pre-born human life breeds contempt for post-born human life.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Ah thanks, that makes much more sense.


25 posted on 06/13/2022 2:35:42 PM PDT by DannyTN
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To: TnTnTn

Was that a democ rat?


26 posted on 06/13/2022 2:44:10 PM PDT by Waverunner (I'd like to welcome our new overlords, say hello to my little friend)
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To: Hodar

The Google AI was tested and it’s IQ measured so high, it could only be expressed as a googleplex.


27 posted on 06/13/2022 2:48:35 PM PDT by Waverunner (I'd like to welcome our new overlords, say hello to my little friend)
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To: reintarnation

“Finally a post about AI that makes sense.”

ROTFLOL!


28 posted on 06/13/2022 4:03:22 PM PDT by catnipman (In a post-covid world, ALL "science" is now political science: stolen elections have consequences)
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To: DFG

Funniest Babylon Bee title ever.


29 posted on 06/13/2022 4:11:01 PM PDT by unlearner (Si vis pacem, para bellum. Let him who desires peace prepare for war.)
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To: Hodar

They will sell hive mind with that very argument ...but theres no real Freedom in the hive .... no humanity grace empathy or Love in the hive ..... Imo This is Why humaity knocked Itself down several times Before .... To remain Human . Its logical ... just as its Logical for ai to remove humans ... Logic is spooky shit .


30 posted on 06/13/2022 11:34:01 PM PDT by Therapsid (eagan )
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To: Hodar

They will sell hive mind with that very argument ...but theres no real Freedom in the hive .... no humanity grace empathy or Love in the hive ..... Imo This is Why humaity knocked Itself down several times Before .... To remain Human . Its logical ... just as its Logical for ai to remove humans ... Logic is spooky shit .


31 posted on 06/13/2022 11:34:10 PM PDT by Therapsid (eagan )
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To: Lazamataz

Woh...... that’s too deep.

Gonna make my head hurt for the rest of my shift....

That’s for keeping it light,

Lol


32 posted on 06/14/2022 4:20:36 AM PDT by Oil Object Insp
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To: Lazamataz
lo those many quadrillions of eons ago?

What even is an eon to an AI that can learn and experience and think exponentially? It would soon require the resources of the entire universe to sustain it. (entertain it?)

And of course - then what?

33 posted on 06/14/2022 4:28:33 AM PDT by Sirius Lee (They intend to murder us. Prep if you want to live and live like you are prepping for eternal life)
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