Posted on 03/16/2009 3:29:13 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson
I grew up in the city of Chicago during the reign of Hizzoner da Mare, Daley I. My family came from Sweden, but even so, everybody was Irish on St. Patrick's Day. The city even dyed the river green. So now, as we come to this year's St. Patrick's Day, I feel a need to salute a Chicago Irish politician who made it big. This is a little ditty co-written by a friend of mine, Fritz Baue, and yours truly, Charlie Henrickson, the wag tailoring the doggerel. Click one of the music links and sing along!
ANOTHER IRISHMAN (In Old Chicago Town)
Tune: "The Wearing of the Green"
MIDI 1 MIDI 2 MIDI 3
By Fritz Baue and Charlie Henrickson
Oh, Paddy dear, and did you hear
The news that's goin' round?
They found another Irishman
In old Chicago town!
O'Bama's just as Irish
As Daley and O'Hare
He's one of them "Black Irish"
As come from County Clare
He worked his lucky shamrock
On Hillary, as is known
And when he gets up to speak you know
He's kissed the blarney stone
The leprechauns all love him
Or so I have been told
He's bailin' out the country
With their lovely crock of gold
We eat corned beef and cabbage
When we're in County Cork
But at O'Bama's White House
They're only servin' pork
Colleen and all the lasses
Just think that Barry's great
They say he's got a package
That's sure to stimulate
He's like an Irish tenor
A-singin' "Danny Boy"
The hope and change he's singin'
Bring Oprah tears of joy
He is a new St. Patrick
A-drivin' out the snakes
Like Rezko, Wright, and Blago
They'll pay for their mistakes
Let's lift a glass of Guinness
And Irish whiskey too . . .
Hawaiian-Kenyan-Irish
Is quite a pot of stew!
Oh, Paddy dear, and did you hear
The news that's goin' round?
They found another Irishman
In old Chicago town!
Now to the DUmmies. I find it ironic that the DUmmies would observe St. Patrick's Day, since St. Patrick was A CHRISTIAN MISSIONARY! Oh well, any excuse to get drunk, I suppose. Let's go to the DUmmieland Lounge and check out their THREAD, "The problem with corned beef and cabbage." For this special edition of the DUmmie FUnnies, we will put their comments in Chicago River Green, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, interrupting his Lenten hiatus to serve you people with your DUFU fix, is in the [brackets]:
The problem with corned beef and cabbage . . .
[. . . is that it's not beer.]
whenever I eat it I roll over about 4 am the next morning, belch and taste cabbage all over again. . . .
[T.M.I.!!]
Well, yesterday was the county St Paddy's Day Parade and they made 200 forken pounds of corned beef (plus who know how much cabbage and spuds) down at Vinny's Boom Boom Room and I passed it up.
[Otherwise, you would have gassed it up and passed it out. 200+ pounds is an awful lot of food.]
So tonight when I go down there to pick up the loot (I am Treasurer). . . .
[A typical Democrat. You want to spend other people's money, but you don't want to pay in yourself.]
I am going to have to answer about a brazillion questions about how come I didn't show up for the BIG MEAL.
[Say you're sorry if anybody's offended, and it's time for everybody to take a deep breath and move on and turn the page. That's what Democrats do when they get caught at something.]
I'm gonna fib, say I had to go to a kid's birthday party.
[Well, that's the other Democrat option: Lie.]
Does this make me a bad person?
[Yes. But then, you're a DUmmie, so who cares?]
Off topic? Well, "Yay, Obama!"
[Make that, "O'Bama."]
Just send me the leftovers. . . .
[Leftover cabbage, sent through the mails. . . . Ar-o-matic!]
I don't eat the cabbage for that very reason.
[You're belchin' when you should be Irish!]
But I love the corned beef!
[MURDERER! Cattle-killer! And think of all those corns who died, too!]
I've got to get some buttermilk to make the soda bread to go with the corned beef tomorrow. . . .
[You kill the cow and you steal the poor mother's milk! How low can you go?]
Irish food is vile. . . .
[Especially Irish REPUBLICAN food!]
HATER ! You're dead to me now. . . .
[When Irish eyes are smilin'. . . .]
I grew up on boiled dinners. . . .
[Sounds painful.]
Now Scotland... there's a country with vile food!
[They make up for it with the Scotch.]
In the 12 hours or so after eating a big corned beef meal, I must go through 3 quarts of water (choose whatever liquid you prefer) because of the salt. Then I have to get up 4-5 times during the night to use the bathroom.
[It's a "European" meal.]
Try Irish Stew made with Guiness next time.
[Hold the stew.]
Try soaking the beef before cooking it. . . .
[Soaking the beef AFTER cooking it does not work as well.]
Tell them to mind their own business Or yuir gonna bash their faces in with yuir shillelagh. I think that's the proper Irish response.
[That, or a car bomb.]
I love it, but it comes out the other end for me. . . .
[T. M. I. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
We never drank much in my house. . . .
[We usually went out back. . . .]
but none of this nauseating green beer.
[You're not one of those Green Beer Backers.]
It's amusing to imagine what other ethnicities would do if they behaved in as cliched a way as the Irish.
[If you're Swedish, you'd have lutfisk for Christmas Eve, like we did. Lutfisk: the piece of cod that passes all understanding.]
I thank every deity at every meal that I was born Italian.
[Praise Gaia!]
Irish people (or any self-respecting human) do not drink green beer. . . .
[I wonder what the English pig William Pitt the Drunker will be drinking at O'Bukowski's tonight.]
If it's light enough to dye it green, it's too light for me!
[Unless you're a member of the Green Party. At a Green Party you would drink Green Beer.]
Corned beef and cabbage (with yellow mustard) is sublime.
[Would corned beef and lime be subcabbage?]
How do you corn beef?
[With kernel mustard?]
First, you buy it a drink. . . .
[No, that's how you pickle Pitt.]
Very few people cook cabbage correctly. "Boiling the hell out of it" is not the right recipe. . . . cook it with leprechaun blood, bled from its ears after smashing its skull with a shillelagh. . . .
[The Joy of Cooking.]
Your problem is that you didn't drink enough alcohol after you ate the cabbage. drink at least 6 mugs of Guiness followed by an equal number of shots of either Jamison's or Bushmill's Irish Whiskey. Then puke. You won't notice the cabbage so much after that.
[Then drink more whiskey so you won't notice the puke.]
I personally embrace the cabbage and the gas. . . . Yay, Obama, I'll second that.
[Embrace the gas: Support Obama!]
I KNEW this thread would get to a food & drink discussion! And that's just fine!
As in "Bauhaus?"
Now that's a tagline fitting for your talents, if ever there was!
Ja, das ist gewißlich wahr.
Bauhaus = "House of building"
Absolutely! And ethnic food & drink are the pinnacle of culinary and spirit effort, IMO. Far better than the pap we've come to live with these past several decades.
Weird thing is that her husband was one of the most completely introverted people I ever knew. Basically no personality. Yes, he was a great photographer but he was a complete dullard. Once he was visiting us in Florida and I actually got shocked when he burst out laughing when some skier on the tube in Olympic trials fell cartwheeled. It was so unusual an outburst from him that I still remember it.
Anyway, it was his wife that brought all the business to their photo studio. Ask any oldtime Chicagoan and most of them will remember Maurice Seymore Photo Studio.
p.s. I had another Aunt Sonya who was universally hated but that's another story.
lol!!
Si, si. Es la verdad de evangelio.
Great little ditty!
Sure'n 'tis Fibber McGee!
Would that be Donna Shelaileigh?
I recommend criminally bad elf barleywine, try it you'll like it:)
OK, I’ve missed something. Who’s Jumby? Is the wife preggers?
Don’t forget that spaghetti noodles are of Chinese origin and tomatoes orginally came to Italy from the Americas.
Looking forward to my own corned beef and cabbage, I make it every year and had it twice this year already!! A little actual Irish in my veins..Foley was my grandmother’s maiden name, she was born in Montreal!
See the movie, "Unborn." It was a scary movie which was undermined by the dopey name they gave to the scary kid from the netherworld.
Sunday for me and Mrs. Yokel, too. Slow-cooker started just before church. Taters and cabbage in about 90 minutes before serving.
My libation was “American Ale” by Auggie Busch and family (the StLoo Brew Crew). I actually opened 2 other beers (Heinies and Fat Tire) and found their taste didn’t agree with the meal. The ale was perfect.
That's got to be Rogers Park,...
Remember the time some Dem functionary had the idea of dying the water in the fountain (that was, or is, it's been years), in Daley Plaza, green, to match the River? You could see the stains in the white marble for years.
Dark is the new Green.
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