Posted on 06/07/2007 6:49:15 PM PDT by buccaneer81
I’m glad it didn’t happen to me.
She is the dumbass, and I got the kids, the house and the freedom I gave up for 21 years.
My only regret is not divorcing her sooner.
I read of him though.
I think that I’d rather read more of Hemingway than I would of this silly thread.
That is one of my problems. I do not manage my reading time adequately.
I’d rather read stuff from a guy who shot himself in the head, than read crap that will make me want to shoot my own self in the head.
I read most of this, until I got bored. Men who get married a bunch of times sure have a lot of advice to give, don’t they? Glad I’m not married.
I really appreciate FRee Republic, because most of the posts and posters are so keenly objective in nature.
I know really great guys who got the shaft in court and are paying through the nose now. Completely unfair, totally outrageous. I wish they had come out swinging instead of being gentlemen.
On the flip side is my sister; talented, funny, very pretty woman who worked 3 jobs to keep the roof over her lazy-ass husband's head. While he was claiming poor, and my sis was killing herself to pay the bills, he was actually squiring his girlies around, taking them out to dinner, buying them presents, etc. He didn't have money to give her for their daughter's school clothes, but he had money to take his honies skiing! He told her she was such a fat, ugly cow, she was lucky he stayed with her!
Sis decided to change her life. Got a gastric by-pass and filed for divorce. Lost a bunch of weight, looks fabulous, and is dropping the 185 pounds of crap (soon to be ex-husband) from her life.
Sis tried to play nice for the sake of their daughter; splitting everything fairly down the middle (even though she paid most or all of the bills for their entire marriage), making concessions to end things amicably.
Just recently, she found a great guy who adores her and treats her like a queen. When POS found out, he threatened to take their daughter away from her, claiming she was an unfit mother. Isn't that a laugh? He was cheating on her for years, but he apparently didn't like the fact that he had been REPLACED.
That was it. Now it's war. She's going for the jugular, and I'm shouting encouragement all the way. She has proof of his infidelity going back years and she wants EVERYTHING.
Attorney says she has a good chance of getting it!
Great post! thanks!
According to this guy, if I get married, I’ll be old, lonely, and broke, and possibly in prison.
There are lots of us out there who take the "forever" part of the marriage oath very seriously.
My husband and I have shared almost 14 years together; lots of ups, a couple of serious downs, but overall, a very solid marriage. I love him more today than the day I married him; he is not just my husband, he is the father of our precious children...and, in my eyes, that makes him more special than any man on Earth.
He is the man God wanted for me, and I swore, before God, to be his forever. I have faithfully kept that oath, and will do so until I die.
If you have God in your marriage, and treat each other with respect and trust, you can get through anything life throws your way. All of the difficulties we faced didn't come from inside our relationship, but from obstacles the world placed in our path (health issues, etc.). Then again, we spent 3 years getting to know each other - really know each other - before we married, so there were no "surprises" after the wedding.
God bless!
The difference is that the system will eat his lunch and use it to buy her dinner. Just watch.
The system is built on the assumption that EVERY man is like the 'hole in you situation. I've been a white male my whole life, heh. That and obtaining my Sociology degree as a white male has more than adequately educated me on the history and characteristics of "systemic and culturally biased discrimination." And I can tell you that the "Friend of the Court" is BUILT to be a no-win situation for men.
Oh, sure, the laws and procedures don't SAY "the father," its just the 90% of those that get the "unfortunate" treatment are men. The 10% that are women allow the civil servants and judges to lie to themselves about how fair the system is.
Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. :-)
I know that true love and Ladies (not mere “women”) who take the Oath seriously do indeed exist, because my parents were excellent examples in such regards.
I haven’t closed my mind and heart to the possibility of meeting a sincere, sane, and ‘real’ Lady, but one’s surroundings tend to limit one’s choices and opportunities. My circumstances won’t last forever, however, and I will keep myself open to possibillties.
Thank you again for your kind words and best wishes to you and yours. :-)
Ahem ... I did not write this missive, but 25+ years ago I lived it.
Helped a lot in the second mistake I made - I kept everything! ................... FRegards
good for your sister!
My sister in law’s husband left her with two babies to raise. couldn’t get a dime of child support out of this looser. He went from state to state , working cash jobs and finally had a “slip and fall” and ended up on disability, which she did get a couple of 15$ checks from. whoooopeee!! (sarc)
Kids grow up(mom doing all the raising and supporting) and the dad secretly contacts the 17 year old online. She wanted to know her father and in her naive stupidity she kept up a contact. The father invited her six states away to live with him for her senior year in high school. My sister in law of course didn’t want her daughter to go but finally conceded.
The a-hole has the kid for a few months then decides that HE WANTS CHILD SUPPORT!! LIKE 300 $ A MONTH!!! I told sister in law that I’d go to jail first! stupid ass friend of the court thought that the fact that he owed over 40K back child support didn’t matter and she should pay. She didn’t have the money so her greedy ex proposed that she didn’t have to pay him child support if she would waive the 40K back support he owed her. She didn’t have any choice and did it....BUT MY GOD!!!! This a-hole will only have the kid for one measly year and walked away scott free!!
The system doesn’t look as though it is biased towards women to me.
men are usually the ones with the high paying careers. The women have given birth to the children, ruining their bodies and making them less appealing on the open market:) They usually have the responsibility of finishing raising the children which does put a crimp in any sort of dating.
the man can walk away and get along with a one bedroom apartment, the women usually don’t have that luxery.
men usually just keep working the job they have.
women have to go out and start a whole new career all the while trying to raise children all on their own. Most divorced men don’t seem to be all that jacked up about being there for their kids once they divorce.
at least this is what i’v seen personally.
You're right. One problem that men who sing the 'I've been wronged' tune is that they are just weak men who. We tend to get what we deserve.
As I said earlier in this thread, in the scenario the poster described, the guy should have just kicked his wife to the curb, got a lawyer, and start the process. In the meanwhile, take charge of his life and find a better woman.
Some of these guys should just see it like this: a wife who leaves you just presents you with an opportunity to date new women.
Marriage to me is like buying a new car: A depreciating asset that either becomes an old friend or a money pit over the years, depending on your situation.
Good post — mr goldfinch, (snoring on my shoulder) and I have been married 32 years.
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