Posted on 09/18/2006 6:06:49 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
Remember the movie, The American President? It was standard liberal claptrap written by Aaron ("West Wing") Sorkin. The climax of this forgettable flick was a chip-on-the-shoulder speech by President Andrew Shepherd in which he strongly supported the banning of assault weapons and handguns. That was unquestioned liberal orthodoxy eleven years ago when that movie was made. However, it now appears that the Left has not only ditched the gun control shtick but now actively advocates arming themselves. Not against criminals but to fight against EVIL Republicans. They have even recently embraced the movie, "Red Dawn" which has until recently been denounced as a rightwing flick. Now the DUmmies are embracing this movie as a blueprint for their own imagined survivalist struggle against the Republicans where they fantasize themselves as leftwing Wolverines. This complete change in attitude towards guns can be seen in this DUmmie THREAD titled, "Yesterday, I Bought a Gun." So let us now join the DUmmies as they fantasize themselves as leftist gunslingers in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wearing a bullet-proof vest, is in the [brackets]:
Yesterday, I Bought a Gun.
[WOLVERINES!!!]
It's a nice .223 mod. What did I buy it for you ask? Protection, nope. Hunting, nope. Harm to Others, Nope. I bought it for the day in my life when a war comes to my backdoor. I plan to keep it safe and very secure from my family and never intend to use it until either the Republican Army or the christians come knocking on my door.
[Of course, this DUmmie doesn't even consider the possibility of a struggle with ACTUAL Muslim terrorists.]
With that said, if they come with hostility, I'll blow their kneecaps off.
[First you have to learn how to aim.]
However, what if this "conflict" never happens, what will I do with this gun? It's simple, I'll be buried with it and a copy of the Constitution because that's what its all about, loving your country, and making sure you and yours are safe.
[You'll be buried under a pile of empty pizza cartons in a testament to your useless life in mommy's basement. Perhaps a friend will ennoble your pathetic existence by setting fire to those pizza cartons to give you a faux Viking funeral.]
For when the sword is mighter than the pen, you will live to see another day.
[Is that from "The Two Towers" or "Return of the King?"]
PS, I hope there are some ammo stores availabe during the apocolypse. Oh wait, we'll have the big black L on our shoulder so we won't be able to buy ammo.
[Even worse, you won't be able to buy toilet paper.]
They steal another election and we'll all be buying guns.
[You can then shoot yourself with a paintgun.]
I'm just saying that another round of Republican rule and we'll all have to become survivalists, 'cuz they don't seem to understand their responsibility to the public when catastrophe hits.
[Can you survive without order out pizza for a week?]
Hey, I'll tell you one other thing, there's a hippy farm about 30 miles from where I live. Hell I'll just head down there. The feds never mess with their "Hemp" production.
[Smoke all the hemp you want. Why change your lifestyle?]
Russian soldiers refused to fire on their countrymen... ---- And American soldiers, except for a few nutcases, will do so, too. In fact, it is highly unlikely that the Pentagon would follow the neocons down the path to military dictatorship. Not everyone is as crazy as the PNAC. ---- But just for the record, the American population is just about the best-armed civilian population on Earth. Those attempting to enforce widespread martial law would be faced off against 30-40 million armed Americans,.... who, after the first week, would have M-16's, too. ---- Thomas Jefferson could scarcely have imagined where history and technology would lead, but he understood human nature. 2nd amendment gun rights are not about hunting or recreation.
[I'm tempted to make the LOUSY FREEPER TROLL accusation but now I'm not so sure since the DUmmies have done a big one-eighty on the topic of gun control when they started thinking they would have to fight the EVIL Republicans.]
As far as a personal arsenal goes, I'd recommend one handgun (concealable defensive weapon,) one 12 gauge shotgun, and one rifle such as an AR-15, Kalashnikov, M-1 Garand or SKS.
[A DUmmie munitions expert weighs in.]
JOIN THE NRA NOW!!!!.....AND SHOW Them that libs and progressives beleieve in the right to bare arms.....
[Benburch believes in the right to bare buttocks.]
Lets satrt the DRA !!!
[DUmmie Rifle Association.]
But, at this point in time, there are other things to be concerned about and plan for. For instance, there's no doubt the blog-o-sphere has hurt these bastards. What happens if they decide to take it down under the guise of some free market bullshit? We all KNOW the corporate media hates the competition. One day DU just doesn't come up anymore. What multiplies our strength is the ability to communicate and get the truth out. It would be prudent to have other options available, wouldn't it ?
[Don't worry. I told Karl Rove to keep the blog-o-sphere up and running since you DUmmies are such a rich source for DUFU comedy material.]
Yep, and if you're going to use your gun to fight fascists, those fascists are likely to be in the form of a SWAT team, so you'll want to aim for the head, as the torso will be heavily armored.
[And of course the fascists that this DUmmie means are EVIL Republicans, not actual Islamofascist terrorists.]
I used to be adamantly anti-gun. No more. I haven't bought a gun yet, but I've thought about it.
[Especially after watching the "V For Vendetta" fantasy.]
I recently bought one too... It's a nice .40cal Ruger Semi-Auto, and it scares the living hell out of me. I've taken it out the the shooting range a few times now and there are no questions that it will obliterate anything unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end. I hope to God that never happens, but I'm starting to feel a sense of security when I think about the fundamentalist nut jobs taking to the streets to bring us all to Jesus... If you start pushing your religious ideology on the rest of us, or dicking around with our civil rights, you'd best skip my place...
[Another DUmmie apparently unaware of the proclivities of REAL LIFE decapitating Islamofascist terrorists. Instead he lives in a "V For Vendetta" dreamworld.]
i am also armed with a .223 M4 carbine. The perfect CQB weapon next to the MP5, but can 'reach out and touch someone' effectively at 300 meters. You may want a sidearm too, a 9mm or .45ACP, as a last ditch defense or for a suicide out in a no-win worst case scenario. In these insane times its a sane choice to have a service weapon to defend your home. It's what's commonly referred to an STHF scenario, or Shit Hit The Fan, when society collapses into turmoil from civil unrest, catastrophic disasters, tyrannical government, religious fanatics, or zombies rising from the dead.
[I recommend you go straight to that suicide scenario from the get-go.]
As for the Microwave units that will undoubtedly be used against the populace at some point, since we're all guinea pigs to them anyway, bring a roll of TIN FOIL, drop it to the ground as you hang onto the free end of the roll in front of your body - creating a shield, and not only will it offer some protection, it will also play havoc with the unit sending the microwaves, especially if a BUNCH of people aimed the waves right back at them.
[And don't forget to roll that tinfoil into the shape of a hat to wear on your head.]
Just as surely as the Muslims believe that Muhammad was a prophet, American Leftisits believe we want to force convert them all and that any Christian public expression is part of the plot. All foreign policy initiatives of the U.S. government, in their world, are designed to advance megachurch American evangelical Christianity. For instance, just before our local peace group died out, the two founders of it were quoted by a local reporter as expressing worry that we would use missionaries to forcibly convert the Iraqis.
The Left is also very scared of megachurches for some reason, and more than one professor at my local college goes on rants in pretty much every course against the one we have in town, acting as if more than 50 people worshipping Christ at a time is some sort of Mafia. Since he teaches history, he has a springboard to the subject in every course. He even whines about people worshipping with their hands up.
Especially when you consider the fact that all Sulu ever did was say "Aye, aye, Captain" when Kirk said "Ahead Warp Factor One" or somesuch.
I mean, it doesn't portray him as some decisive leader...
Red Dawn...Yes.........American President.......For all but the ending, yes also...the ending BULL!@
Good point. He came in second by the way, mostly on name recognition, though I'm sure it helped that he's an able speaker and has good screen presence.
Welcome aboard, PINGEE #922.
Welcome aboard, PINGEE #923.
Welcome aboard, PINGEE #924.
Did you guys ever read the unabridged version of The Stand? King takes a detour from the main characters and spends a whole chapter describing how a lot of the people who survive the plague die anyway because they don't adapt to the post-civilization environment. One of them is reclusive, middle aged spinster whose view of men has been warped by her mentally ill mother. She is deathly afraid of being raped, and arms herself with her father's gun, which she finds in an attic trunk. The first man she comes across makes an advance...she pulls out the gun...aims...and blows her own head off because the decades-old ammo misfires.
So folks, if you don't know how to use the gun, don't mess!
Today I looked up from my work while my wife was switching channels on the TV, and I saw footage of George Clooney in Africa on MSNBC with the words "Clooney's Dangerous Mission" at the bottom of the screen. I said to the wife, "I thought hi dangerous mission was making a movie critical of Joe McCarthy 50 years after his death."
When I was reading it a few years ago, I mentally tabbed that chapter as "Darwin's Follies."
girlangler, did you mean to direct that request to PJ-Comix, to be put on the DUmmie FUnnies Ping List?
Perversely, it's my favorite chapter in the whole book. The scariest chapter in the whole book is the one where he follows the transmission of the disease from one person to another and another...the plague section of the book is several times scarier than the rest of it, but it is a great novel.
The problem I have is that the disease would have been almost certainly identified as (a) being artificial and (b) of American origin.
The USSR and China would launch their nukes...
The US would return the favor...
And that would be that.
(Remember, this was back when strategic warhead totals were in the 10,000+ range on each side.)
For DUmmies that have used handguns, look for slide bite, evidenced by a wound on the meaty part of the right hand between thumb and index finger.
Yeah, I wasn't sure what she meant about that list request. Remember, there will be no PINGEE if it is a DRAFTEE.
NO BLOOD FOR PINGS! BUSH LIED, PINGS DIED!
Yeah, I was reading The Stand while visiting my folks once. I hadn't been there in a long time. Anyway, I had a hard time getting to sleep since the book was so scary. Late that night I woke up in a fright so I went to the refrigerator to get a drink of water. Suddenly I heard "CLOMP! CLOMP! CLOMP!" I froze in fear while backing into a dark corner of the kitchen as the clomping sound got closer. A strange creature entered the kitchen and I was in a complete panic. Then the creature opened the refigerator door and I felt relief as I saw outlined by the refrigerator light the stark nekkid body of my father who was on one of his frequently sleepwalking missions to the kitchen. He took a slug of milk from a carton, cut a loud fart, and then clomped clomped back to his bedroom without ever awakening the whole time.
Well lefties still fear McCarthy for one simple reason, HE WAS RIGHT. You know what would have been "brave"? Making a movie showing how he was right, and that there were communist agents in high ranking positions in the US. Now that would be a true risk taking movie.
Or better yet in this age of "Will & Grace", "Brokeback Mountain" and "Queer Eye" making a movie about Jeffrey Dahmer and John Wayne Gacy, and not whitewashing over the fact that these were GAY men. Or even mention NAMBLA and Gay in the same paragraph.
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