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Dems Vote to Deport Schwarzenegger
Counterjab ^ | 04/24/2005 | Chris Davis

Posted on 04/24/2005 7:34:50 PM PDT by writer33

Washington — In an embittered and highly contested vote, Democrats—along with a few Republicans lawmakers—voted to deport Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, R-CA. In his bigoted speech to the Newspaper Association of America last week, Schwarzenegger claims to have misspoken after using ill-advised, typically conservative, racist comments.

“It’s a federal issue,” Schwarzenegger said. “And the only thing I can say and add to this is, really, close the borders. Close the borders in California, and all across Mexico and the United States.”

Critics pounced, stabbing him in the back and kicking him while he’s down, and Schwarzenegger apologized the next day. He blamed faulty English for the gaffe, and said he was for “securing the borders” instead. In his recant, Schwarzenegger added, “Yesterday was a total screw-up in the words I used. Because instead of closing, I meant securing. I think maybe my English, I need to go back to school and study a little bit.”

Democrats huffed and puffed, almost blowing the house down over Schwarzenegger's alleged malapropism — "the governor's words are an embarrassment," scolded state Treasurer Phil Angelides. “Something has to be done about our vigilante governor.”

“We have a terrific relationship with Mexico," Schwarzenegger said. "I filmed four movies in Mexico and I love to go on vacation to Mexico. We have a great trade agreement with Mexico.”

Lawmakers didn’t listen to Schwarzenegger’s pleas, bringing hate legislation to the floor of Congress. “I don’t care what he (Schwarzenegger) says,” noted Dianne Feinstein, D-CA. “My vote counts and I say deport him.”

Barbara Boxer, D-CA, also jumped on the bandwagon, berating Schwarzenegger and giving a yes vote. “It sounded like there was a little swastika in those comments,” she screeched. Like father, like son I guess. “We’ve got to do what’s best for our nation and send him back to Austria.”

The fevered debate on The Hill lasted almost 15 minutes before voting commenced, happily throwing Schwarzenegger to the wolves and deporting him back to Austria. “We can’t allow these bigoted remarks to go unchallenged,” commented Olympia Snow, R-ME. “There’s a new tone here in Washington and we can’t reach out to Democrats with Republicans like this.”

“First, these menacing minutemen and now this from Schwarzenegger,” said Gov. Christine Gregoire, D-WA. “I fully support the action by Congress. I think it’s great. We’re much more diverse here in Washington.”

Despite the protests from Schwarzenegger, the U.S. Justice Department plans to storm the mansion, kidnap Schwarzenegger in the early morning hours and place him on a plane. In order to make sure we have this right,” noted Sen. Clinton, D-NY. “We’re bringing in Janet Reno to help us clean house in Sacramento.”


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Government; Humor; Miscellaneous; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: arnold; chrisdavis; dems; satire
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Chris Davis is the author of Elective Decisions and In Defense of Liberty, two political thrillers by Whiskey Creek Press.

He has published with Free Republic, Men's News Daily, The New Austrailian, Intellecutal Conservative, Enter Stage Right, Chron Watch, The Rant.us and the Starr Journal.

His book can be purchased at his link: http://www.whiskeycreekpress.com/chapters/InDefenseOfLiberty_ChrisDavis.shtml

He is a poor, starving conservative, beaten down by big business and the rich. Please by his book.

1 posted on 04/24/2005 7:34:51 PM PDT by writer33
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To: blackbart.223; speedy; HitmanNY; NYTexan; bitt; Stellar Dendrite; Glenn; Lokibob; kellynla; ...

Deport Ping!


2 posted on 04/24/2005 7:36:19 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: LoveBushLongTime; dittomom; sweetliberty; xJones; Gabz; lilylangtree; cyborg; jwalsh07; jmstein7; ..

Deport Ping!


3 posted on 04/24/2005 7:37:03 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: tapatio; Pegita; spacewarp; Byron_the_Aussie; TankerKC; GOP Soccer Mom; sinkspur; Libloather; ...

Deport Ping!


4 posted on 04/24/2005 7:37:51 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: writer33

Yes, if I was a fly on the wall...(chuckle) -- Get 'em Governator! :-)


5 posted on 04/24/2005 7:38:40 PM PDT by EagleUSA (q)
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To: EagleUSA

I agree.


6 posted on 04/24/2005 7:39:23 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: writer33

Ha! I laugh at you puny efforts to deport me human. They crushed me and melted me, and I came back, I alvays do.

7 posted on 04/24/2005 7:41:39 PM PDT by Enterprise (Abortion and "euthanasia" - the twin destroyers of the Democrat Party.)
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To: writer33

LOL! I saw that title and just rolled my eyes--sounds like something they would try to do--then looked at who the author of the piece was! Good--really good!


8 posted on 04/24/2005 7:42:57 PM PDT by luvie (Freedom is on the march. Freedom is the birthright and deep desire of every human soul.GWB 3-29-05)
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To: Enterprise

Great graphic. It really adds to the thread. Thank you, E.


9 posted on 04/24/2005 7:44:44 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: LUV W

Glad you enjoyed it, L.W.


10 posted on 04/24/2005 7:45:05 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: writer33

BTW--I've already bought the book, suck-up!!!! LOL!


11 posted on 04/24/2005 7:47:27 PM PDT by luvie (Freedom is on the march. Freedom is the birthright and deep desire of every human soul.GWB 3-29-05)
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To: writer33

Arnold is no Elion Gonzales.


12 posted on 04/24/2005 7:47:59 PM PDT by F.J. Mitchell ( Soros , confirming the fact that the love of money is the root of all evil.)
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To: writer33
"He is a poor, starving conservative, beaten down by big business and the rich. Please by his book."

Lol

13 posted on 04/24/2005 7:49:06 PM PDT by F16Fighter
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To: writer33

You're velcome human.

14 posted on 04/24/2005 7:49:25 PM PDT by Enterprise (Abortion and "euthanasia" - the twin destroyers of the Democrat Party.)
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To: writer33

Deport? Which on of you assho@@ want to be first to try? Whoops, see them run! Typical Democrat trash.


15 posted on 04/24/2005 7:50:34 PM PDT by Logical me (Oh, well!!!)
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To: writer33

Good laugh when I need it most -- late Sunday night. Thanks Chris. I swear, you and Mark Steyn can churn out a column every 15 minutes. You should start selling this stuff by the pound!!


16 posted on 04/24/2005 7:53:00 PM PDT by speedy
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To: writer33
I'LL BE BACK


17 posted on 04/24/2005 7:54:42 PM PDT by smoothsailing (Qui Nhon Turtle Co.)
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To: writer33

(AP)

In a surprise move, Chef wunderkind,Austrian Wolfgang Puck, of Malibu, Ca. agreed to post an immigration bond in the amount of 5 million dollars for Governor Schwartzenegger today.
" I am appalled by the talk about my close friend Arnold in DC, and I will close my 4 star restaurant there
in protest" said the feisty little chef. Arnold will be living in America long after those crooked politicos in Washington are just a memory Puck added " And Feinstein, tell your billionaire husband he is persona non grata at my Malibu restaurant too! "A lousy tipper,this guy Feinstein" added Puck


18 posted on 04/24/2005 8:02:14 PM PDT by international american (Tagline now flameproof....purchased from "Conspiracy Guy Custom Taglines"LLC)
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To: LUV W
BTW--I've already bought the book, suck-up!!!! LOL!

You should've. Trying to pry money out of your conservatives is like getting a Democrat to vote for a tax cut. :) Hehe!

19 posted on 04/24/2005 8:06:57 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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To: F.J. Mitchell
Arnold is no Elion Gonzales.

Good eye. Glad you enjoyed it.

20 posted on 04/24/2005 8:10:46 PM PDT by writer33 ("In Defense of Liberty," a political thriller, released in March. Buy it. I need new shoes. :))
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