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The Lint Trap: Will smoking dryer lint become the newest drug epidemic to sweep the
www.freetheseed.com ^ | 03.20.05 | Chris Haire

Posted on 03/19/2005 3:31:08 PM PST by Chris Haire

Knight-Rider) Charleston, S.C. -- Marianne Watson is your typical Daniel Island High School student. She likes shopping at the Galleria. She enjoys hanging out with her friends at Dancin’ Nancies on teen night. She is obsessed with singer Jack Johnson. But unbeknownst to her family, Marianne had a drug problem.

Her friends knew Marianne abused drugs, but troubled teens very rarely know the trouble they are in until it is too late. And in the case of Marianne Watson, the trap she fell into was well hidden. Alcohol, marijuana, cocaine, LSD, heroin – Marianne knew to avoid these drugs. As a member of the local D.A.R.E. teen street team, she was well versed in the dangers of substance abuse.

But what happens when the drugs aren’t illegal? What happens when those drugs don’t cost a dime? Even worse, what happens when those drugs are available in your own home?

For Marianne, the drug pusher was two doors down the hall from her bedroom.

For Marianne, getting high was as easy as cleaning out the lint trap.

For Marianne, her high came from smoking dryer lint. Now she's in a coma.

She's not alone. An estimated eight teenagers in the Low Country of South Carolina have been admitted to local hospitals after smoking dryer lint, leaving experts wondering if they are witnessing the birth of a dangerous new drug epidemic, one that could put the 1980s crack epidemic to shame. Even more troubling, while drug epidemics generally target inner city areas, this new high knows no geographic or socio-economic boundaries. In fact, this new high could potentially be more prevalent among the middle and upper classes than any drug epidemic previously. After all, what suburban household doesn’t have a washer and dryer?

(Excerpt) Read more at freetheseed.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: blogpimp; blogpusher; bs; crap; dopernewbie; fraud; fullofit; kittychow; liar; lie; lying; madeup; madeupstory; newbie; nottrue; tinfoil; troll; trollalert
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1 posted on 03/19/2005 3:31:08 PM PST by Chris Haire
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To: Chris Haire

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Nice try.


2 posted on 03/19/2005 3:33:05 PM PST by B-Chan (Catholic. Monarchist. Texan. Any questions?)
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To: Chris Haire

3 posted on 03/19/2005 3:33:28 PM PST by billorites (freepo ergo sum)
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To: Chris Haire

I think it's obvious who's smoking the "lint" here.


4 posted on 03/19/2005 3:35:57 PM PST by digger48
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To: B-Chan

Getting high on smoke inhalation? Lack of oxygen?


5 posted on 03/19/2005 3:38:08 PM PST by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: Chris Haire

I am reminded of the Great Banana Peel Scare of the early 70’s. Some hippies start the rumor on the street, it’s picked up by others and soon our “esteemed” Congress critters are trying to ban the importation of bananas.


6 posted on 03/19/2005 3:40:24 PM PST by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: R. Scott

Exactly.


7 posted on 03/19/2005 3:42:26 PM PST by Chris Haire
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To: Chris Haire
So-so attempt at satire.

I'll be generous and give it a 6.

8 posted on 03/19/2005 3:44:38 PM PST by Mr. Mojo
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To: Chris Haire
"kids feel bouncy....snuggly," oh pelezzze!

But, hey, I just finished washing. Wonder how much money this would go for?

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9 posted on 03/19/2005 3:50:42 PM PST by CitizenM (An excuse is worse and more terrible than a lie, for an excuse is a lie guarded. Pope John Paul II)
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To: CitizenM

That's the beauty of it. It's free.


10 posted on 03/19/2005 3:52:11 PM PST by Chris Haire
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To: Chris Haire
I knew there was some reason I have been collecting dryer lint all of these years. Silly me, I told myself I was simply collecting it to put in my mulch. IT HAS NEVER MADE IT TO THE BIN. I've got a friggin' gold mine. Woo-hoo.

Psst, hey kid, wanna buy a bag?

Yeah, I'm not the best house keeper.

11 posted on 03/19/2005 4:52:04 PM PST by Finger Monkey (H.R. 25, Fair Tax Act - do the research, contact your legislators, get this puppy passed.)
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To: Chris Haire

Is this from the onion?


12 posted on 03/19/2005 4:54:54 PM PST by Wheee The People (Oo ee oo ah ah, ting tang, walla-walla bing bang. Oo ee oo ah ah, ting tang, walla-walla bing bang!)
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To: Chris Haire

Well it's still not as strange as licking toads.


13 posted on 03/19/2005 4:57:30 PM PST by dfwgator (It's sad that the news media treats Michael Jackson better than our military.)
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To: Wheee The People

Nah, I like to make this stuff up.


14 posted on 03/19/2005 4:58:21 PM PST by Chris Haire
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To: Chris Haire
What about bellybutton lint balls? Do they have the same effect or does it depend on what type shirt you wear that day?
15 posted on 03/19/2005 7:18:33 PM PST by quantim (Victory is not relative, it is absolute.)
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To: quantim

The 411 on Dryer Lint Slang

Lint-hopping -- collecting dryer lint from lint traps at Laundromats
Snuggle Muggle -- a person who has never smoked lint
Tumble Weed -- lint collected from a lint trap; see also, tumble dry weed
Permanent Press -- high-grade lint
Colorfast -- high-potency lint laced with Clorox, characterized by colorful hallucinations
The Cleaner -- the cops; see also, dry cleaner
Dirty Laundry -- low-grade lint, gathered from various sources, most commonly pockets & belly buttons
Linthead -- a person strung out on lint
Lintels -- the sticky residue left on a lint trap after smoking
Lintel Soup -- a tea made from boiling lintels
Observing Lint -- getting high
Martinized -- getting arrested
Crimson Tide -- coughs assoc. with lint smoking, characterized by bloody mucus
Downy Soft -- high; ex: "Are you high?", "Man, I'm so downy soft."
Rolling with the Tide -- getting high
Bleached Whale -- a person passed out from smoking
April Fresh -- high; see, Downy Soft
Mr. Clean Screen -- a smoker who takes too many hits off the communal lint trap
Gainfully Employed -- an unemployed dryer lint smoker
Laundry Bag -- a plastic bag of dryer lint
Rinse & Repeat -- clean the lint trap and repack it
Feeling Fab -- high
Trapped out -- out of lint
Lint trapped -- having a bad lint trip
Ab-Fab -- stomach cramps & diarrhea assoc. with Lintel Soup
Tide Down -- getting high
Clean & Jerk -- muscle spasms &, in some cases, seizures assoc. with excessive lint smoking


16 posted on 03/19/2005 9:13:54 PM PST by Chris Haire
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To: Chris Haire

By any chance, do you write for the New York Times?


17 posted on 03/19/2005 10:49:31 PM PST by PeanutbutterandJellybean
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To: Chris Haire
Urban legend or just utter tinfoil?

Go peddle this junk someplace else.

18 posted on 03/19/2005 10:54:16 PM PST by nopardons
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To: Killborn; 506trooper

Yooooooooooooo hooooooooooooooo...here's someone to play with. ;^)


19 posted on 03/19/2005 11:27:30 PM PST by nopardons
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To: Chris Haire

Dude, you're not supposed to drink the bong water.


20 posted on 03/19/2005 11:29:45 PM PST by Petronski (If 'Judge' Greer can kill Terri, who will be next?)
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