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Keyword: satire

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  • Here's a gift idea for the liberal in your life...

    12/23/2015 10:02:22 AM PST · by The Looking Spoon · 8 replies
    American Irony ^ | 12-23-15 | The Looking Spoon
    In case you need to do any last minute shopping for the holidays, here's a modest proposal...
  • Maybe Hillary wouldn't need bathroom breaks during debates if she wore this...

    12/21/2015 3:51:34 PM PST · by The Looking Spoon · 22 replies
    American Irony ^ | 12-21-15 | The Looking Spoon
    This is the problem with the DNC burying their debates a week before Christmas. Noboby wants to see those Grinches argue about how much Christmas government is entitled to right before the big day...and then we miss moments like her bathroom break.Next time Hillary should have a pair of these.
  • ACLU, NAACP Decry Court Decision on Abortion [semi-satire]

    12/21/2015 9:15:12 AM PST · by John Semmens
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals decision upholding an Arizona law banning abortions performed because of the sex or race of the baby was assailed by spokesmen for the law's opponents as "a backward step toward slavery and oppression." NCAAP spokesperson Shakeel Infante maintained that "forcing an African-American woman to bear a baby she doesn't want negates the promise of freedom we are striving to implement in this country. Motherhood has burdens. Forcing those burdens on an unwilling woman is slavery, pure and simple." ACLU spokesperson Alexa Kolbi-Molinas agreed and added that "not only does this ruling enslave Black women,...
  • UN Officials Aghast at Unwarranted Reaction to Muslim Violence [semi-satire]

    12/20/2015 9:36:30 AM PST · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    The UN's Adama Dieng, special adviser on the prevention of genocide, and Jennifer Welsh, special adviser on the responsibility to protect civilians warned against the unwarranted reactions of non-Muslims to recent terror attacks in Paris and San Bernardino, California. "Every religion has its own idiosyncratic beliefs and behaviors," Dieng pointed out. "What may seem bizarre, incomprehensible and inexcusable to one faith may be the epitome of devout observance to another. For Muslims it is important to show ones faith by taking up arms against unbelievers. For Christians, Jews, Buddhists, or whatever, to object evinces a shameful intolerance." Welsh concurred and...
  • Death of Republican (parrot) party.

    12/19/2015 9:05:41 PM PST · by pa_dweller · 10 replies
    Day by Day Cartoon ^ | 12/20/15 | Chris Muir
  • Bergdahl to Face Court-Martial [semi-satire]

    12/19/2015 1:01:25 PM PST · by John Semmens · 6 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    This week, the US Army announced that Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl will stand trial on charges of desertion and "misbehaving before the enemy." Bergdahl was returned to the US in exchange for the release of five terrorists in 2014. Bergdahl spent five years with the Taliban after leaving his military post in Afghanistan in 2009. At the time of the exchange, President Obama welcomed Bergdahl home saying that he had "served with honor and distinction." Press Secretary Josh Earnest denied that the Army's decision to court-martial him invalidated the President's earlier praise of the man, saying that "in our country a...
  • Obama Admin Defends Gitmo Releases [semi-satire]

    12/19/2015 10:16:36 AM PST · by John Semmens · 3 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    Reports that nearly all of the terrorists the Obama Administration has released have rejoined the jihad against the West left the Administration unfazed. In fact, that only 191 of 196 of the individuals released have joined the ranks of ISIS, al-Qaeda, Hezbollah and the like was touted as "relatively successful." "I've always believed that it is better to let 100 guilty men go free than to imprison one innocent man," said Defense Secretary Ashton Carter. "If we're keeping score here, we see that we only let 191 guilty men go free in order to free five innocent men. So, it...
  • Even Obama has caught Star Wars fever!

    12/18/2015 4:54:51 PM PST · by The Looking Spoon · 8 replies
    American Irony ^ | 12-18-15 | The Looking Spoon
    A couple of Photoshops from years past...
  • Sanders Campaign Breach Called "Most Serious Threat Ever" [semi-satire]

    12/18/2015 2:41:20 PM PST · by John Semmens · 14 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    Due to a temporary lapse of a "firewall" in the Democratic National Committee's (DNC) database, the Sanders campaign was able to access confidential information on the Clinton campaign. Discovery of the breach has led the DNC to block further access by the Sanders campaign. While blocking Sanders' people from accessing data on registered Democratic voters is regarded as a serious setback to the Senator's chance of winning the Party's presidential nomination, the Clinton campaign is not satisfied the penalty is severe enough. "Sanders' covert spying into the strategy of Secretary Clinton's campaign is the most serious threat ever to this...
  • Breaking: Obama to Ban Guns in Movies, TV and Video Games

    12/14/2015 12:22:44 PM PST · by conservativejoy · 64 replies
    Mr. Conservative ^ | 12/14/2015 | staff
    It's no secret that Obama is on a mission to destroy the Second Amendment, and his latest strategy to grab guns can only be described as extremely disturbing. According to American News, Obama is planning an executive order that would use censorship to ban the use of guns in Hollywood films, television shows and video games. Sources in the White House say that Obama is planning to make Hollywood a "gun-free zone." "We are on a very slippery slope when anyone denies the right of screen writers to use guns in scripts and the right of actors to keep and...
  • Hillary Campaign Denounces Benghazi “Smear” [semi-satire]

    12/14/2015 1:10:06 PM PST · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    In a recent interview on ABC TV, Democratic presidential contender Hillary Clinton denied that she ever told the mourning family members of the four Americans murdered in Benghazi in 2012 that she blamed a video for their deaths. Unfortunately, those family members unanimously tell a different story. Tyrone Woods' father remembered Clinton promising that "the filmmaker who was responsible for the death of your son will be arrested and punished." Sean Smith's mother and uncle said Clinton told them the same thing. Glen Doherty's sister was especially offended by what she characterized as "a gratuitous falsehood. The video story was...
  • State Department Defends Refugee Vetting Survey Instrument [semi-satire]

    12/14/2015 8:30:08 AM PST · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    State Department spokesman John Kirby ridiculed Congressional attempts to "interfere with the President's immigration policies as unhelpful and unnecessary." Kirby specifically chided efforts to restrict Administration plans to transport refugees from Syria to the United States if they can't be properly vetted. "We already have a vigorous screening process in place," Kirby asserted. "Before any refugee is admitted he must first answer questions designed to detect potential terrorists--questions like 'Are you a member or representative of a terrorist organization?' And ' Do you seek to engage in terrorist activities while in the United States?' A yes answer to any one...
  • Administration Admits CO2 Cuts Futile [semi-satire]

    12/13/2015 7:49:15 AM PST · by John Semmens · 4 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    This week at the United Nations Paris summit on climate-change, U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry admitted that "even if every western nation reduced its carbon emissions to zero—a clearly impossible accomplishment—global CO2 will continue to rise." The reason is that the growing emissions from the less-developed nations will easily overwhelm whatever the West does. Still, Kerry pressed for western nations to make the commitment "because it would be a noble gesture. By sacrificing our prosperity we make reparation for the centuries of exploitation and oppression we have inflicted on our victims. Ideally, this sacrifice would earn us gratitude, but...
  • New Law to Regulate Dark Matter

    12/12/2015 2:44:44 PM PST · by huckfillary · 31 replies
    Artful Dilettante ^ | December 12, 2015 | Artful Dilettante
    In what amounts to stunning acknowledgement of its very existence, and a reversal of existing policy, Congress yesterday passed legislation by a wide margin granting sweeping federal regulatory authority over dark matter. Obama has already promised to sign the legislation which he termed “a small step in the right direction.” The vote culminated months of secret negotiations and political horse-trading. Up till now, each state has been free to regulate dark matter in its own way and of its choosing. The law now prohibits independent state action on dark matter, making it the exclusive province of the federal government. Tenth...
  • Administration Defends Initial Moves Following San Bernardino Terrorist Attack [satire]

    12/12/2015 7:59:54 AM PST · by John Semmens · 11 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    December 2's murder of 14 and wounding of 21 at an office holiday party by Syed Rizwan Farook and his wife Tashfeen Malik in San Bernardino, California was immediately recognized as terrorism by the FBI. Nonetheless, orders from the White House forbade the investigators from publicly acknowledging this. Presidential Press Secretary Josh Earnest defended this suppression of critical information "as part of the President's broader strategic goals. Tragic as the event may have been for those involved, their interests cannot be allowed to supersede these goals." Among the broader strategic goals Earnest mentioned "was the necessity of insulating the Administration...
  • Colorado ACLU Honcho Says Trump Supporters Should Be Shot [semi-satire]

    12/12/2015 12:01:43 AM PST · by John Semmens · 7 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 13 Dec 2015 | John Semmens
    In a post to his public page on Facebook, Loring Wirbel, a board member of the Colorado ACLU and co-chair of the Colorado Springs chapter, justified shooting anyone who supports the idea that Donald Trump should be elected president. "Not too long ago Republican presidential candidate Jeb Bush was asked if he would be willing to travel back in time and kill Hitler in his crib," Wirbel recalled. "Gov. Bush quite sensibly said yes. Well, Donald Trump is our era's Hitler and we wouldn't have to travel back in time to take the action necessary to prevent him from ushering...
  • ISIS Surrenders in face of Climate Change Conference

    12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST · by ArGee · 10,942 replies
    Vanity | 12/10/2015 | ArGee
    Raqqa, Syria Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris. "This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no...
  • Star Wars Is Garbage

    12/11/2015 2:44:59 PM PST · by Borges · 89 replies
    Breitbart ^ | 12/11/2015 | MILO YIANNOPOULOS
    With Star Wars, liberal Hollywood got it all wrong. They get everything wrong, of course, but this movie franchise really takes the biscuit. They turned the heroes into villains, and the villains into shining beacons of virtue. With a new film on the horizon, I feel duty-bound to warn you about the desperate shortcomings of this particular entertainment phenomenon. If we are honest with ourselves, the real wretched hive of scum and villainy is Skywalker Ranch, where George Lucas and his band of morally dissolute bastards created the Star Wars universe, a blight on western civilisation and culture.
  • Donald Trump wants to close up the Internet (ZOT!)

    12/07/2015 10:09:55 PM PST · by UncleRicosFootball · 355 replies
    The Daily Dot ^ | 12/7/15 | Patrick Howell O'Neill
    Hours after Donald Trump suggested the U.S. ban Muslims from entering the United States, the leading Republican presidential candidate said America should also consider “closing the Internet up in some way” to fight Islamic State terrorists in cyberspace. Trump mocked anyone who would object that his plan might violate the freedom of speech, saying “these are foolish people, we have a lot of foolish people.” “We have to go see Bill Gates,” Trump said, to better understand the Internet and then possibly “close it up.”
  • What the newspapers might have looked like if Obama was president during Pearl Harbor...

    12/07/2015 2:19:44 PM PST · by The Looking Spoon · 28 replies
    American Irony ^ | 12-7-15 | The Looking Spoon
    This graphic from The People's Cube reminded me of this mock newspaper I created 2 or three years back now...with each passing year Obama and the left have made it more and more accurate.