Free Republic

Pope Francis said today that he would set up a commission to study whether or not he can find more ways to confuse and frustrate the living crap out of people, revealing an openness to re-examining the church’s long-held insistence on not speaking off-the-cuff. His move was hailed as a breakthrough by those in the media who have clamored for years to be given more stuff to speculate on, and who cite research showing that a pope whose speeches were scripted and thought out produced nothing for the media to report on, and therefore, pointless. But the idea will face...

Enjoy!

Why are figures at National Review and other places so easy to parody? This is the subject of my upcoming four-volume treatise on how to lose a culture war with class and décorum, so I don’t want to give away too much here, but suffice it to say I don’t think that the problem with respectable conservatism is just that they’re afraid of being called racist or sexist or homophobic. They certainly are afraid of that, yes, but I think that the deeper problem is they’ve fully internalized a whole raft of premises about race, about gender, about “sexual orientation”...

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a scientific marvel reportedly funded by the Koch brothers, Ted Cruz and John Kasich announced at a press conference Tuesday that they have fused into a single candidate, in what is being seen as a last-ditch effort to deny Donald Trump the Republican nomination. The new candidate, named Jed Crusich, reportedly came into being by merging the bodies and essences—and voting bases, as the plan certainly goes—of the two former candidates Cruz and Kasich. Also fused are their delegate counts, bringing Crusich to 707—within striking distance of Trump’s 845. Crusich, whom Donald Trump has already dubbed “Cheatin’ Jed”...

Men and women are different. They have different reproductive parts. Different hormones. Therefore they've tended to use different bathrooms. Different locker rooms. Because, well... they're different! But what about those gender-confused individuals who aren't quite sure if they're a Tommy or a Tammy? What happens to them? Fortunately we found one brave Bill, who would journey to the capitol to become Jill. Thank you, Schoolhouse Rock! VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcUJgbWrM64

“This skit was outright sacrilege. They know if they did this to Muslims they’d have to be put into the witness protection program,” the singer-actor said. Pat Boone is calling out NBC and Saturday Night Live for allegedly being anti-Semitic, anti-Christian, cowardly, “diabolical” and even demonic for a skit over the weekend that parodied God’s Not Dead 2, the actor-singer’s latest movie. In God’s Not Dead 2, Melissa Joan Hart plays a public school teacher who is persecuted for answering a student’s question about Jesus. In the SNL skit, a trailer for a movie called God is a Boob Man...

As the national debate whether people should be allowed to use bathrooms according to their chosen gender identity continues to swell one transgender woman makes a revolutionary, and costly proposal to settle the argument. Charlie Shimpner, former chair of Transgender Humans United for Gender Silliness (THUGS) was excommunicated from the LGBTQ community after a writing a Facebook post suggesting the transgender community should accept the creation of alternative bathrooms for "transgender-Americans." The post went viral in a matter of hours and ignited a petition on Change.org for Facebook to create a "remove from Facebook button.' Said Shimper, "I thought long...

LOUISVILLE, KY—For the third time in as many gatherings, the Together for the Gospel Conference was marred by an outbreak of turbulence as tensions rose over differing hermeneutic approaches to Scripture. “The dispensationalists feel like they’ve been given short shrift again,” said Dr. John Dawsen, as a Crossway pen whizzed by his ear. “Combine the grammatical-historical and redemptive-historical feud and inter-complementarian squabbles, and you have a recipe for contention.” Clad in a Straight Outta Westminster t-shirt and sporting a teardrop tattoo by his left eye, Charles Lyman said, “It’s not my fault they can’t read their Bibles. Next time they...

If you’ve ever stayed up late at night, there on your futon, restless, staring at your popcorn ceiling, wondering what a Trump vs. Sanders town hall/debate would look like… then sleep well tonight, friends. We’ve got you covered. Behold: YOUTUBE LINK: https://youtu.be/9In0Xf8HH4k Finally we have some answers on what Bernie Sanders will do regards jobs. Well…we have the most we’re going to get out of him. Cut him some slack, he didn’t earn a paycheck until he was 40. At least he gave us some clarity on where he stands on China and TPP. Right? Schools? Jobs? Yes, frankly, all...

April’s issue of MAD magazine will examine just why individual strands of President Obama’s hair decided to turn gray. The parody illustration — which will be included in the magazine’s upcoming issue due out on newsstands April 19 — is titled, “A Strand-by-Strand Examination of Obama’s Gray Hairs.” The graphic was authored by Desmond Devlin and illustrated by Sam Sisco. Click the image above to enlarge. Below is just a small sampling of some of the “strand-by-strand” analysis of each of Obama’s gray hairs:     Hair #9804 — Why It Turned Gray: As a Constitutional scholar, he knows that his numerous violations of the Constitution...

During what campaign staffers describe as a "senior moment" Democratic presidential candidate Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont picked up a comb that was sitting on a table at his campaign headquarters and used it on himself. "This has been a crazy campaign, but that was by far the most insane thing I've witnessed so far," said campaign staffer Chip Beaverton. "He looked, I don't know, his hair was nice and even. He looked, um, respectable? As crazy as that is to say, it's nothing compared to what happened next." According to witnesses at the scene Senator Sanders calmly walked out of the...

I am letting you be among the first to know. It is true. I am leaving the Catholic Church. I want you to know that this has not been a decision made in haste or without serious and intense research and consideration. But I can no longer remain in a church that I no longer believe in. Let me explain. I will be writing more about this soon, but for now let me just say there are five main reasons why I am leaving the Catholic Church: 1. I believe the sole rule of faith for Christians has to be...

Took a break from this stuff for a while and during that time I got an idea to try something new. Hope you guys like it. --- While at a campaign stop a bald eagle confuses Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump's hair for a nest and proceeded to make a home on his head. Initially viewed as a threat offers by members of the audience to shoot the bird clean off his head were rejected by Trump, who ultimately welcomed the bird to make his home on what he deemed to be prime real estate. "I've been so focused on the campaign...

LOUISVILLE, KY—By a nearly unanimous vote, the General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church (USA) voted to overlook or explicitly endorse a number of additional sins in what is being perceived as an attempt to slow its rapid pace of membership decline. As balloons came down, the PC(USA) commissioners danced in the aisles to the Kool & The Gang 1980 party standard Celebrate and some attendees openly wept for joy as the denomination announced their official endorsement of pride, gossip, sorcery, covetousness, theft, and sexual immorality as a general category. “Finally,” sobbed self-described “open gossiper” attendee Rebecca Arnett. “I no longer...

Published on Feb 28, 2016 From the producers who brought you "The Producers," #Trumped is a new musical starring Matthew Broderick, Nathan Lane, Cloris Leachman and the unlikely candidate himself, Donald Trump.

(with apologies to Meat Loaf) And I would do anything for Trump I’d toss away my vote, like that I would do anything for Trump He’ll always lead me on with his circus act But I’ll never forget how very angry I feel Right now, no way And I would do anything for Trump, but I won’t do facts No, I won’t do facts Anything for Trump Oh, I would do anything for Trump I would do anything for Trump, but I won’t do facts No, I won’t do facts And some days he acts so crazy And some days...

The Honeymooners, this is a hoot. Probably posted seeing how many hits it has but decided to try it again.

I'm just so thankful to be an American with a uterus today, because federal agencies have really got all the bases covered for me. (Which is a relief because who has got time to use reason? Also, science is hard. Let's go shopping.) The CDC issued a nuanced, thoughtful report this morning with the brilliant recommendation that card-carrying members of the x-chromosome club ought to either be using contraception throughout the entirety of their childbearing years, or teetotaling. Thankfully, being a simple suburban housewife with little capacity to make reasonable, well-researched choices for my own health and wellbeing and that...

Planned Parenthood Staph Member of the Year (Planned Parenthood undercover tapes parody. "Staph Member") Video only on link.

NAF Conference - Renee Chelian - Michigan Abortion Provider These are the actual words Renee Chelian's said while speaking at the National Abortion Federation Conference. The video can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/studentsforlife/videos/10153248053067927/ Video only on link.....