Free Republic

“I do feel that if my [opponent] continues to scrape the bottom of the barrel for objections, he is in danger of getting splinters under his fingernails...” -William Wilberforce, “Amazing Grace”

i’m a writing consultant at a fully-accredited private christian college, and recently a freshman approached me for help writing an essay. when i asked him what his thesis statement was he responded,

“What’s a thesis statement?”

public education is da bomb! s/c

ironically, his essay was about how unqualified Palin was to be VP..

“welcome to the hotel CALLLIFFFOORRRNIIAAAAAAAAA...” folks, give it up for the next william dung!.. oops, i mean “hung...”

=)

seacrest... OUT!

ya know, as much as oBOMBa detests the 2nd amendment, i have to believe he’s got some firepower of his own. what else could could leave such a gaping hole in his foot? =)

let’s just hope he has enough ammunition to last him until November 5th...

“McCain is going to win NH, a state where he performed well and Obama performed poorly in the primaries.”

McCain won NH in the primaries because Democratic voters from Mass crossed the border and voted for him (thus prompting Operation Chaos on the Republican side). something tells me those voters will stay home this time around...

Richard Mellon Scaife:
-funder of the American Specatator’s Arkansas Project
-boss of Christopher Ruddy, investigative journalist who exposed the Vince Foster cover-up

People, people! Operation Chaos, anyone??

Think of it this way: if Rush Limbaugh were the publisher of the Pittsburgh Tribune Review, who do you think HE would endorse?

OC strikes again... =)

Interestingly, Mitt Romney was on Hannity and Colmes last night and Sean mistakenly commented, “...and i didn’t see your hand raised on the global warming question, either.”

Mitt just kept smiling and didn’t bother to correct Hannity. That was the last straw for me. stick by your position or don’t run for POTUS. It’s that simple...

“In October, A FARMER from Zhenping County, in north China’s Shaanxi Province, claimed he had snapped some photos of a tiger in the forest near his home.”

lol! hold up for a second... so rural farmers in red china are running around with kodaks on their off-hours, snapping pics of the wildlife?? riiiiigggghhhhttt...

if she really wants to stop the “murder,” she ought to sell all her 800 dollar surfboards and provide an alternative way for these fishermen to support their families. you can bet THEY don’t get welfare for just deciding not to work... if some hollywood upstart went gliding by in her 400 dollar wet suit to scare away my livelihood, i think i’d shove a pointy stick in her direction, too...

people, will you look at the source? it’s CBS! has anyone considered looking at the original context of thompson’s quote? The fact is, when Fred Thompson made his comment about not taking anything off the table, he didn’t know the specifics and was playing it smart (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,297228,00.html). he was caught off guard by a question, he honestly admitted that he didn’t know the details, and responded by neither blindly supporting or attacking it until he knew more. it’s just common sense that if you don’t know the particulars of a subject, you don’t blindly endorse or condemn it. don’t just buy this crap that CBS is dishing out. they’re trying to make thompson look like a flip-flop politician by not giving the context of his quote, and you’re playing right into their hands. what we should be gleaning from this story is that thompson is a darn good politician.

so the turtles go around the edges of this thing, and motorists will have TWO chances to hit the little buggers. nice...

hmm, i wonder how many rape, burglary, and attempted murder victims were included in this pole...

cause of death: failed surgical procedure to remove cancerous growth, performed by self.

Dudden’s version supplies some choice couplets missing in the text above.

“Rejected”

A stranger stood at the Gates of Hell
And the Devil himself had answered the bell
He glanced at him from head to toe,
And said “My friend, I’d like to know
What have you done in the line of sin
To entitle you to come within,”
Then Franklin D. said with his usual guile
As he gave the Devil his winning smile,
“When I took charge in ‘33
A Nation’s faith was mine you see
So I promised this and promised that
And calmed them down with a Fireside chat.
I put padlocks on their banks
And called the Congress a bunch of cranks.
I spent their money on fishing trips
Fishing from decks of their battle-ships.
I gave men money with W.P.A.
Then raised their taxes and took it away.
I killed their pigs and burned their crops,
Would raise their wages then close their shops
And double-crossed both old and young
And still the fools my praises sung.
I brought back beer, then what do you think,
I taxed it so high they couldn’t drink.
I gave them money with government loans,
When they missed a payment I’d take their homes.
When I wanted to punish the folks you know,
I’d put my wife on the radio.
I payed them to let their farms lie still
And imported foodstuffs from Brazil.
I curtailed crops when I felt real mean,
And shipped in corn from ‘Argentine’.
Now when they’d worry, stew or fret
I’d get them chanting the alphabet.
With the A.A.A. and N.R.L.B the W.P.A. and C.C.C.
With all these units I got their goats
And still I crammed it down their throats.
When organizers needed dough
I closed the plants for the C.I.O.
I ruined jobs and I ruined health
And put the screws on the rich man’s wealth
And some who couldn’t stand the gaff
Would call on me and how I’d laugh.
I ruined the country, its homes and then,
Placed the blame on Nine Old Men.”
Now Franklin talked both long and loud.
The Devil stood and his head was bowed.
At last he said, “Let’s make this clear,
You’ll have to look elsewhere, you can’t come here.
For once you mingle with this mob,
I’ll have to hunt myself a job.”

The poem, “Rejected,” is in The Assault of Laughter: A Treasury of American Political Humor, Edited and with an Introduction by Arthur P. Dudden (New York: Thomas Yoseloff, 1962), 499-500, attributed to “Anonymous.”