Posted on 09/25/2014 8:25:58 AM PDT by Morgana
1. The reasons pornography is not wrong.
Pornography isn’t wrong because sex is bad or the body shameful. It's wrong because sex is good and the body magnificent! As Christians we must never forget whose idea sex was in the first place. It was not thought up by Hugh Hefner or by Cosmopolitan magazine but by God! In fact, God's very first commandment to humanity in the Bible is to “be fruitful and multiply” (Gen 1:28)! And as philosopher Dr. Peter Kreeft noted, “I do not think he meant for us to grow oranges and invent calculators.”
Pornography is wrong because it removes sexual intimacy from its natural context, turning it into a commodity to be bought and sold. It has been rightly said that the problem with porn is not that it shows too much but that it shows too little—too little of the human person.
Pornography reduces the mystery and beauty of a man or woman to a collection of body parts to be used rather than recognizing them as persons to be loved. It reduces the great mystery and sanctity of human sexuality to a trivial activity that need not be of any real importance.
2. Pornography is not just a man’s issue.
While it is certainly true that men have cornered the market on visual pornography, it’s not true that women don’t also struggle. One survey revealed that 34 percent of female subscribers of Today’s Christian Woman online newsletter admitted to intentionally accessing Internet porn.
Because pornography is predominantly consumed by men, many women who struggle with pornography feel an even greater sense of shame and isolation. One young woman I know put it this way:
For over seven years, I was addicted to hardcore pornography, masturbation, and lust—and I am a woman. Often we hear that women may struggle with fantasy and romance novels, but porn—porn is a guy thing. One of the most shaming statements I ever heard was, "Women just don’t have this problem." I started to lose hope after I heard that. How do you argue with the ‘fact’ that only men struggle with porn? It is sad, because this mindset is causing so much damage to women. It causes many women to question their sexuality and wonder if they are homosexual because they are involved in a sin "only men" get caught up in. It isolates them, silences them, keeps them trapped in this sin and drives them further away from freedom and into the darkness.
If you or a woman you know struggles with pornography, be assured that you are not alone. Help is available, and healing is possible. You might begin by visiting the website Beggar's Daughter.
3. Porn stars don’t enjoy what they do.
When I inquired of a friend of mine, a former porn star, if this was the case, she said, “Well, there are several reasons why girls get into the porn industry, but a hardcore sex drive isn’t one of them. I know, because that’s what I used to tell people in interviews.” Another former porn star put it this way:
Sex-packed porn films featuring freshly dyed blondes whose evocative eyes say ‘I want you’ is quite possibly one of the greatest deceptions of all time. Trust me, I know. I did it all the time, and I did it for the lust of power and the love of money. I never liked sex. I never wanted sex, and in fact I was more apt to spend time with Jack Daniels than some of the studs I was paid to fake it with. That’s right—none of us freshly dyed blondes like doing porn. In fact, we hate it. We hate being touched by strangers who care nothing about us. . . . Some women hate it so much you can hear them vomiting in the bathroom between scenes. Others can be found outside smoking an endless chain of Marlboro Lights. . . . But the porn industry wants YOU to think we porn actresses love sex. They want you to think we enjoy being degraded by all kinds of repulsive acts.
Pornography “immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world” (CCC 2354). One such illusion is that the women in the porn industry enjoy making pornography. While this may be a convenient illusion for those seeking to justify their pornography use, the reality behind the fantasy is another story entirely.
For an eye-opening and detailed insight into the world of pornography, get my two-CD set, The Ugly Truth. On the first CD I interview a former porn star, on the second a former Playboy producer. I truly believe that anyone who listens to this with an open mind will never be able to truly justify pornography again.
Many years ago I had some camera equipment and did amateur photography. There was this one “stuck up” girl at work no one could get near, but she kept shying up to me and the camera, mugging whenever she could. Now for the “Dear Penthouse” moment. She was a friend but she got her own apartment and wanted to show it to me. It took her all of 3 minutes to be naked and mugging for the camera on her bed. I learned that day that girls LOVE the attention a camera brings. Girls would literally jump I front of the camera at every opportunity. I was doing scenic shoots in England and loving the countryside but it turned out I had more photos of girls than I had of countryside. Puppies and babies maybe chick magnets but cameras are the supermagnet.
I’ve got about 10 screen plays partially written. Non of them are porn.
It's still his responsibility as the head of the marriage, whether you like it or not.
The outcome of the woman's response is not always guaranteed, but he is still responsible to try and work at the relationship himself, and he is accountable before God as the man, just as Adam was in the garden.
Their eyes weren't opened until after HE ate. Sin entered the world through Adam.
Too bad, but foisting the responsibility off on the wife, the woman who is the weaker vessel, is blame-shifting and an indication of issues in the man's heart and mind.
I don’t get that. Someone gets a camera out, and I’m GONE!
Never heard of Jimmy Evans, but a significant number of reputable Christian marriage experts don’t have much nice to say about LaHaye’s book.
Leman’s ‘’Sheet Music’’, Penner’s ‘’The Gift of Sex’’ and Nelson’s ‘’The Book of Romance’’ are far, far better.
I also remember years ago, Dr. Laura being very critical of married men who viewed porn on line. Her view changed dramatically when she got a letter from a married man who was denied sex with his wife and expressed the frustration and depression the rejection caused him; especially since he would never consider having an affair. After that letter, her first question to a woman calling in about her husband’s porn habit became, ‘’How easy is it for your husband to have sex with you, and how often do you initiate sex with him?’’ Most often, the silence was deafening. At that point, Dr. Laura would make the simple, but honest observation, ‘’How can you blame him if you are refusing his sexual advances?’’
Not saying it is true in every case, but married women sometimes must accept some responsibilty if their husbands are using porn.
metmom,
You need to read Song of Solomon if you think the resposibility is only on the husband; or do you think Song of Solomon is only an allegory about God’s love of His children?
Your views about the sexual relationship within marriage do not appear to be very Biblical.
Do you think it is a sin for a wife to withold sex from her husband except by agreement?
What are the criticisms of LaHaye’s book?
FReepmail if you think there’s a need. I’ve read the book and so am familiar with the content so if it’s better to address it that way, do that.
Absolutely.
How so?
Genesis 3:17 "Because you have heeded the voice of your wife,... "Cursed is the ground for your sake; In toil you shall eat of it All the days of your life.
Adam was the covenant head and because he did not rule his wife correctly but gave into her, tried to make her happy (maybe even for some smoking hot sex) sin entered the world. But your canard that because Adam was the covenant representative Eve is blameless is patently false. She was also cursed and part of that was that she would desire to rule over husband but he was given the authority. Now authority does not translate to culpability or would you blame Christ for the sins of the church? Her most often area of trying to rule her husband is in the bedroom, she reneges on her vows and then holds her husbands sexuality for ransom. Shew makes demands promising to bloom sexually if he will only... But she already made a vow to not defraud to have and hold and to submit to her husband: her body is not hers but it belongs to her husband, yet she uses it for leverage. Some husbands who do not wish to be eunuchs will let her have her frigid power-play and call her bluff. She wants no sex - fine he will find satisfaction elsewhere while still providing and protecting her. He is the head but can only act it if he does not acquiesce to her in her defrauding.
You see what you call blame shifting is what makes you the weaker vessel, because it really is blame avoidance. You avoid your own blame and then blame another, just like a liberal. Justifying the sin not the sinner by making the man the scapegoat for women. You blame the husband for the husband's sins and you also blame him for the wife's sins, you call him to be the head but in the same breath you cut off his authority at the knees.
Me, too! I hate my picture taken. There are extremely few pictures of me. I am usually the one behind the camera.
“It’s the mans job to be the provider and protector of the family “
And not just his but other families as well. Taking advantage of someone, for any reason, is simply not moral or the manly thing to do.
I make needlepoint refrigerator magnets that say JESUS.
I’ve had a few ideas (non porn as well) rattling around in my screwed up brain.
Watch more cat videos. The fur collects on the inside of your skull and muffles the rattling (DAMHIKT).
What happened to your tagline? Everyone loved it!
I have no idea. Didn’t even notice it was gone till you mentioned it.
If it was me, I’d know precisely which teenager to blame.
I have one screen play that is entirely about a “sign” that is poorly worded and easily misinterpreted by both the violator and the enforcer. Put on film today it would work out to about 1 hour. I want it to be 1 hour and 45 minutes. So I am stuffing it with filler. I am almost ready to sell it. I can’t say more.
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