Legal Tragedy for Unemployed Divorced Men & Fathers

[ImFightingMad]

I am writing this to make this Legal Tragedy better known and also in hope that someone could help the thousands of us in this tragic situation.

Like many Americans at this time, I have been laid off. This in itself is bad enough for most Americans, but those of us that have been divorced face a Legal Tragedy that is against The Constitution and all moral concepts. Men are almost exclusively affected by what I am about to tell you. This shows the discrimination of the courts and the laws in this country.

Since I have been laid off, I am only “earning” unemployment insurance, which is only 16.6% of my previous gross income. I therefore cannot pay the alimony and child support that the courts ordered in my divorce in Florida. I do not even have enough money for my own expenses. The courts in Florida are looking at finding me in contempt of court because of non-payment. They would therefore put me in jail along with countless others for the same reason. This makes no legal or moral sense in many ways:

1. If I was still married and got laid off, would the courts care, of course not! The family would have to do what they could to survive. But, since I have been divorced, and there is no relationship anymore, I’m supposed to support them over supporting myself, otherwise go to jail. How does this make any logical, moral or legal sense? Why is it that since I am divorced I have a greater financial responsibility than I ever did when I was married? Why should all of my rights be taken away because I am unemployed now, and yet my ex-wife is suppose to maintain the same or better lifestyle as when I was employed? This again, would not be the case if I were still married. This shows that divorce laws take precedence over basic human rights and are stronger laws than marriage itself, which is a bond with God.

2. If I’m in jail, how am I supposed to find a job? After being in jail, it would be very difficult, if not impossible, to ever find a good job again!

3. This type of incarceration was abolished with the 13th Amendment. Which prohibits Involuntary Servitude. Also 8 USCA-56 prohibits Peonage.

Why should my life and other’s be completely destroyed just because we were ever married and now unemployed?

Isn’t the fact that I, and many others have lost our jobs enough of a tragedy in itself? How does completely destroying the rest of our lives solve anything? In this situation, what could any of us ever do to help ourselves?

I was extremely involved in the 2000 Presidential election, supporting George Bush. I lived and worked in Austin, Texas, but I was still a registered voter in Florida. The government and country that I so dearly loved and put so much energy into, has now let me down.

Please Help!

[Robert_Paulson2]

yes and we have a coven of them here.

[Robert_Paulson2]

agreed, bud, but what can be done about it?
bush ain't gonna rattle the soccer mommies via ashcroft.

the legal system gets 1/3 of it's dough from handling the fallout of divorce.

Women's groups and a LARGE number of "conservative" women support this stuff wholesale.

the media do their deadbeat dad's report twice a month, and the soccer divorces literally soak their shorts at the joy of ever more potential income... while our elected officials sharpen their steely knives in anticipation of some new right they can take away from the no longer wanted "deadbeat daddies" driver's licenses, passpports, professional licenses, even a second spouse's income or inheritance from the death of HER parents.

This is now a bedrock principle of our criminal justice system.
(STARE DECISIS - Lat. "to stand by that which is decided." ) guarantees this will NOT change in our lifetime.

I see that NOTHING can or WILL be done.
It's politically correct to maintain the status quo or go even further. We created a new subclass of american... and failing their adaptation to the new status, we have created a new criminal class where there was none before.

I would say thank you bill clintong, but newt and the republicans pushed the majority of this through via the "welfare reform act"...

Newt Gingrich at the time was hundreds of thousands behind in his child support.

[wardaddy]

we all know with what the road to hell is paved with....we've been steadily paving it since the Progressives 130 years ago.

[Phaedrus]

My ex-wife and I have the perfect relationship -- we don't speak. I bought her off "family support" some years ago, so she's no longer a financial drain. I hadn't seen her for about 10 years until I attended my son's wedding. Didn't say a word to her (and left my .45 at home, so I would not be tempted) but I did notice she had put on 50-100 pounds (couldn't really tell under her "tent" dress). She's now a Grade A slob, drinks too much, eats too much. I call her my Jabba-The-Hut ex-wife. I do feel sorry for the poor schlupp who married her.

[longtermmemmory]

Remember child support can be back modified to the date of the petition and in some cases to the date of the original order.

The important thing is to petition immediatly when your job changes.

Which county are you in?

[gogeo]

....isnt it possible that not ALL men are admirable and wonderful? and that not ALL women are evil witches?

Not only possible, but likely.

[Phaedrus]

Her complaint, "[My husband] is too boring."

The untold story. This culture's dirty little secret.

[gogeo]

i am sure that there are some very vindictive mothers out there who do try, and succeed, to impoverish the father. it is unfortunate that grown men and women can't get over themselves long enough to negotiate reasonable support.

It's only possible to be reasonable with reasonable people. My frustration is not aimed at my ex-wife per se, because she is who she is. My anger is aimed at the family law system, which takes a bad situation and makes it unbearable. I'm a responsible father, and have never been one day late on payment...or visitation...for over 11 years. If I told you about my experiences, you'd think I was exaggerating.

[familyop]

"yes and we have a coven of them here."

I know. That's why I'm moving the fatherhood advocate
hordes in here (and for further education of some of
these men who are new among us). We're going to meet
them at the Convention and do a lot of talking to our
congressmen until then.

In other words, we put up a good vote in 2000, and we're
movin' in for 2004. It's time for our Party to start
listening to us instead of continuing to listen to the
opposition in sheep's clothing. All feminist chicks
are pagans to some extent or other. ...which reminds
me that we need to push Elizabeth Stanton's revisions
against Christianity (Stanton, "Woman's Bible," also
defending by Anthony) back out of the churches, too.
They're infested. Leadership's too feminized.

[Robert_Paulson2]

posted to you "develop a vehicle that runs on solar cells"

---

A top priority for today's budding feminists?

Is it me or was that post "spectacularly ridiculous?"

Sorry I can't quite figure why that was posted to you... I am confused and I didn't even inhale...

[Rutabega]

A woman lives with her two kids so her rent cost is divided by three. --you said

So, I should send my three and five year olds out to work to pick up their part of the rent?--me

The courts figure the husband must pay half the rent.--you

So, isn't that better than paying two thirds?--me

Hmmm. . .emigrate to Sweden, my ex only pays $117 per child--and this is to include food, daycare, clothes, etc.

[RobRoy]

>>It's only possible to be reasonable with reasonable people. My frustration is not aimed at my ex-wife per se, because she is who she is. My anger is aimed at the family law system, which takes a bad situation and makes it unbearable. I'm a responsible father, and have never been one day late on payment...or visitation...for over 11 years. If I told you about my experiences, you'd think I was exaggerating.<<

That is EXACTLY my take on the whole thing. Every word of that statement would be true of my situation as well.

Unfortunately, our story is beyond just common - it's epidemic - and our culture is most definitely just STARTING to pay the price.

[RobRoy]

...except for me it was only six years.

[RobRoy]

I don't believe I should have to pay ANYTHING towards the raising of children who were forcefully removed from my care, protection and responsibility. And if the government didn't have the power of the Gun, I wouldn't have.

Heck, I wouldn't have let them take the kids at all. If I had known my ex wanted out that bad, I would have simply shown her the door.

[Rebelbase]

The nutty post was a blanket statment to everyone. That chick is a loon.

[Rebelbase]

"Also find out who the other lawyers in your area DON'T want to go up against..."

If you can see the problem before the spouse gets an attorney, a good, pre-emptive strike is to find out who the nastiest, bull dog attorneys are and pay them for a 1/2 hour consultation on your situation.

That way you have already established a relationship with that attorney and the spouse will have to find someone else.

You might spend $1000 tying up the best attorneys in town, but its money well spent.

[PatrioticAmerican]

No secret. She's just a slut looking for a good time and is afraid that life is going by too fast.

[zoesmom]

unfortunately, exaggeration tends to be unneccessary regarding the vindictiveness of ex-spouses.

although i sometimes sound like a bitter feminazi, i believe the same things when the roles are reversed, and the father has custody of the children. my brother is in this situation. he has not received a dime in child support in 6 years for his 2 sons. his ex can work full time, but won't, and hiring a lawyer doesn't make sense because all the money he'd spend on the lawyer can better be used for food, clothing, etc. there's no sense in spending a few thousand to get a couple hundred dollars a month. it would take several years to recoup the lawyers' fees.

what me and my ex eventually did was put our differences aside for the good of our daughter. i took the initiative and that was probably one of the hardest things i've ever done. what i found is that he finally became willing to contribute and participate when my attitude changed to one of reasonableness and willingness. i changed from being the heavy handed dictator to a sort of "facilitator". instead of telling him how it was going to be i requested his help in decision making and made him a part of the process. he now understands that he can, and does, play an important role in our daughter's life, and he is now much more willing to contribute financially. considering the pain and financial hardships of the past, what is most amazing is that his current wife and i are now friends and "partners" in raising zoe. in fact, my fiance, my ex, his wife, and zoe and i are a team. we consider ourselves to be a blended family and we have gotten together for dinner and family meetings.

i don't think any of us has ever had it so good. growing up sucks sometimes, but the payoff is definitely worth it.

it was sooooooooo hard to shove that much of my own ego aside and work on relationships with them. maybe that's why i sound so unsympathetic, because i know that doing the seemingly impossible can often be accomplished.

i hope you have a great day and that your ex someday becomes reasonable.

[null and void]

Oooooooooo. You're evil! Where were you when I needed you?

[Pukin Dog]

Your post #532 is spot on.