Posted on 11/23/2002 7:02:03 AM PST by Tina Johnson
Let it never be said that men of uncommon motivations cannot find something over which to agree, and eventually threaten the country at large. On the matter of the sports utility vehicle, the Evangelical Environmental Network has linked arms with other lesser Republicans and environmentalists in direct opposition to the SUV, making their point with an ad campaign simply called “What Would Jesus Drive?” to begin airing soon in Detroit, Iowa, Missouri, North Carolina and the author’s home State of Indiana. Reverend Jim Ball, who is directly involved with the campaign, explained himself thus: “We take seriously the question ‘What Would Jesus Do?’ ‘What Would Jesus Drive?’ is just a more specific version. What would he want me to do as a Christian? Would he want me to use public transportation?” The Savior couldn’t be reached for comment, so there’s no immediate word as to whether or not He would just simply allow grown adults to exercise the free will they’ve been given, kind of like … what they do right now, actually.
Think your life sucks? Try squeezing 750 words out of this intellectual turd, without 500 of them being how the Bible states He and the apostles were all in one Accord, about how it’s obvious He would drive a Crown Victoria, and so forth. Asking yourself what Jesus would do in a given situation is a sticky enough proposition on its face because it puts one in the position of trying to think as He would think; how He would spend $25,000 – assuming He would choose to have $25,000 to start with – is stickier still, because it puts Jesus in the role of, you’ll forgive the expression, a common consumer, as if He would have nothing better to do upon returning to the world than shopping for something to drive. (“Lo, though I return to … Holy Cow, look at that Expedition!”)
When this story broke, my first thought as a non-Christian was, “Now wait a minute. If every sperm is supposed to be sacred, how else are people expected to haul all of their kids around if not large, and in some cases fuel inefficient, vehicles?” Would Reverend Ball prefer good Christians haul their families around in wooden wagons behind their small to mid-sized cars? Of course not. One guesses he would prefer the auto makers dedicate themselves to better fuel efficiency standards without federal prodding, which I would also prefer, which I believe most reasonable people would prefer.
But only the feds can force manufacturers into higher standards, and President Bush seems reluctant to stand for it. So absent that, what else should be said? How about that when one buys a SUV, he’s deliberately choosing a vehicle that uses more gasoline, and is therefore playing directly into the exact same Arab hands that are plotting against us, both to our faces and behind our backs. True enough, and once again, every right minded person would agree that if Man can be talked into going to the Moon based on a mandate no greater than That Old Womanizer’s inauguration speech, we can certainly dedicate the next decade to developing alternative fuels.
But again, you cannot force the feds into pumping money into alternative fuels. So absent that, what else can be said? How about that sometimes when one takes to the road in a vehicle that large, he often comes to have certain feelings of invincibility, which can lead to reckless driving, car accidents and perhaps deaths? Good point, so communities can expand or strengthen penalties for such idiotic and childish behavior, perhaps to the point of jail time.
But you cannot force people to be responsible adults. So absent that, what else can be said? This: Shut up. Whatever arguments can be offered against the SUV (and large trucks), there is at least one that trumps them all, the market. The market provides for those who want large vehicles, with which people can haul around their families, or tow boats and / or watercraft, or move heavy product to and from job sites, and many other of the often necessary things you simply cannot do with the underwhelming force a Yugo provides. Should there come a day when the SUV goes the way of the Studebaker, that would be a proper exercise of the market, as well. As one executive said, “If [the consumers] wanted cars with fins, we’d be making cars with fins.” But they don’t. They want SUV’s, and should have them. Whatever advances toward the ends of independence from anti-American oil producing countries should be a priority, but not forced down the throats of the consumers.
First, Jesus drove a compact, economy model in John 12:15
15. "FEAR NOT, DAUGHTER OF ZION; BEHOLD, YOUR KING IS COMING, SEATED ON A DONKEY'S COLT."
Next, Jesus will be driving sort of a "monster truck" model (with what might be called today as some righteous "Road Rage") as foretold in Revelation 19:11-16:
11. And I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse, and He who sat on it is called Faithful and True, and in righteousness He judges and wages war.
12. His eyes are a flame of fire, and on His head are many diadems; and He has a name written on Him which no one knows except Himself.
13. He is clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God. 14. And the armies which are in heaven, clothed in fine linen, white and clean, were following Him on white horses.
15. From His mouth comes a sharp sword, so that with it He may strike down the nations, and He will rule them with a rod of iron; and He treads the wine press of the fierce wrath of God, the Almighty.
16. And on His robe and on His thigh He has a name written, "KING OF KINGS, AND LORD OF LORDS."
Of all the immoral acts going on in the world today and they make a huge issue out of this? What a waste of time and energy. We have people starving to death all over the world. We've lost over 2 million of our bretheren to slaughter and starvation in the Sudan. We have rampant genicode going on in the abortion mills in this country, and this is just the tip of the immoral iceberg. And they are worried about THIS??
It would appear to me, that this group puts the environment above G-d.
And He would have a dawg inna back ov the truck. And bondo on two ov the fenders. N a gun rack with at leas a couple ov fishin rods in it. He was, after all, a Fisherman as well. N a Cat Diesel hat jes ta complete the look.
He could keep his long hair -- they's a lotta that round here. But He'd hafta lose that robe. No pockets. It'd be bib overalls, the sturdy kind with copper rivets n a lotta pockets. N a tool belt, ov course. N a chaw ov tobacky, Red Man, nat'rally.
N, ev'ry bit ov this is Biblical, cuz the Good Boy sez He was a carpenter.
Glad I could be ov theological assistance ta the Good Reverend.
Congressman Billybob
Click for "Below the Radar -- The Other Republican Victory" (first column run on UPI)
Example: He maybe telling this Pastor not to drive an SUV. But, He never told me that. We live in the U.P. where we recieve over 200" of snow a year on average. Now, would Jesus want me to endanger my family and drive a small car, over a 4 wheel drive? I don't think so, plus He's never mentioned it to me. Now, if I lived in an area where there was no reason to have one, that MIGHT be a different story. Except, I should NOT impose on anyone else what G-d is dealing with ME about. This is not the 10 commandments. Nor love thy neighbor as thyself. This is personal, only to apply to me. When I stand before G-d on judgement day, He's not going to be asking me what someone else did. He's going to be asking me what I did.
If Jesus lived in Israel, he would pick an armor plated Hummer...
No, but I am offended by this crude (and lewd) language.
We also want them to function the same but not run on gas. So, what's the problem? Get busy guys.
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