USO Canteen FReeper Style....Monday Mail Call ....... July 22,2002

FRiends of the USO Canteen FReeper Style and Snow Bunny

[ST.LOUIE1]

"What do you think a Wolf would say? LOL!"

Wild guess here, Wolfie -
(head thrown back) - ArrrrOOOOOOOOOOO !!! LOL!!! Exactly!

Line up, ladies..:)))

Methinks the line will be a very short one. : )

As long as you're in it.....

...I'll be satisfied. : )

[tomkow6]

Is Kneezles home yet? I got some JOKES for him!

[blackie]

Now, you know, no two lips are alike... :o)

[SassyMom]

He's home, I'll go get him. LOL Are they CLEAN jokes????? hmmmmmmmm?????????

[tomkow6]

You home yet?

[tomkow6]

How to tell if your Pilot is Drunk...

10. All the in-flight meals are missing their dessert squares.
9. In between "May I" and "have your attention" there's a 45 minute
pause.
8. He's constantly yelling, "Take that, Red Baron!"
7. Shuttle from New York to Boston includes stopover in Colombia
6. His co-pilot: Robert Downey Jr.
5. For the last hour, he's been riding the beverage cart like a rodeo
cowboy.
4. Keeps coming on the P.A. to point out clouds that look like his old
high school teachers.
3. His wings are pinned to his bare chest.
2. When you fly over international date line, he yells, "Dude! We're,
like, time traveling!"
1. When he exhales, the oxygen masks drops.

[SpookBrat]

Joey USAF......Hey now, it wouldn't be fair for you to take AntiJen flying with you, leaving the rest of us on the ground. I want to fly too. But I absolutely will NOT, ever, no way Jose, forgetaboutit, won't even consider it......never, ever, ever jump out of a plane.....even with a parachut that promises to open. Joey, you are one of my favorites too. *wink* Give your cousin a great big hug from us for sending you our way. What a great family you guys must come from, with so many patriotic members serving our country. That speaks well of your mothers and fathers. God bless you and your wonderful family. I'll keep you in my prayers that you may return home to them soon. Please take care of yourself and stay out of harms way. All my love, Spooky

[tomkow6]

Patient: "Doctor, I keep thinking I'm Mickey
Mouse. And other times, I think I'm Donald Duck."

Psychiatrist: "How long have you been having these
Disney spells?"

[razorback-bert]

That is a mighty cute little calf.

[SassyMom]

ROFLMHO.......You are too much!!!!! hahahahahahaha

[tomkow6]

An old guy came home in the middle of the day to find his young, blonde
wife standing in the middle of their flooded deluxe apartment wearing
only a G-string and high heels.

"What happened here?" he asked. "The entire apartment is flooded!"

His wife said, "I think the waterbed burst." Just then a naked guy
floated by.

"Who's that!" demanded the husband. "I dunno," his beautiful bride
responded.

"Would you believe a lifeguard?"

[LadyX]

I would pay for LOTS of kisses, Wolfie..:)))

Here's some for you for starters, free of charge:

[tomkow6]

A man is sitting in a plane which is about to take-off , when another man
with a dog occupies the empty seats alongside. The dog sits in the middle
with a seat all to himself. The first man is looking quizzically at the dog
when the second man explains that they work for the airline.

The dog handler says to the first man Don't mind Rover he is a sniffer dog,
the best there is, I'll show you once we get airborne, and I set him to
work. Eventually, the plane takes off and when it levels out the handler
says to the first man Watch this.

He tells the dog "Rover, search". The dog jumps down, walks along the aisle
to the back of the plane and sits next to a woman for a few seconds, it
then
returns to its seat and puts one paw on the handlers arm. He says "Good
boy", and turns to the first man and says, That woman is in possession of
marijuana, so I'm making a note of this, and the seat number, for the
police
who will apprehend her on arrival. Fantastic! replies the first man.

Once again the man says to the dog "Rover search". This time he sent the
dog
down to the front of their plane. The dog sniffs about, sits down beside a
man for a few seconds, returns to its seat and places both paws on the
handlers arm He says "Good boy", and turns to the first man and says, That
man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of this, and the seat
number. That's marvellous, I never seen anything like it! says the first
man.

Once again he sends the dog to search the aisles. He goes up and down the
plane and after a while sits down next to someone, and then comes racing
back, jumps up onto the seat and this time craps all over the place. The
first man is surprised and disgusted by this, and asks What the bloody hell
is going on?

The handler replies "Oh crap, He's just found a bomb!!

[Entropy Squared]

I feel silly asking a Canadian this... but I have a link to e-mail Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan, do you? If not, tell me and I will send it to you when I get home. Perhaps you might want to post it here at FR and see if we can encourage them to visit our Canteen.

I feel embarassed to admit it, but I don't have that link. Please post it or freepmail it to me.

[COB1]

This is a sample of the lips available in the kissing booth for men:

Now, it's up to you to guess who they belong to!!

[blackie]

Those lips are okay, to be perfect, they should be a little relaxed and parted about 9/16 of and inch... :o)

[Kathy in Alaska]

That's the one tom! Quite striking. And so apropos for the company you keep.

[JustAmy]

Love Your Sibling As Yourself

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year-olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked,
"Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."

[ST.LOUIE1]

I would pay for LOTS of kisses, Wolfie..:)))

Wow! Just....Wow!! : )

Here's some for you for starters, free of charge:

Watch yourself....Wolfie's on the way!

[SpookBrat]

Scotty USMC......Dearest Scotty, I try to keep these notes simple, yet sincere, without getting too personal about my own life. I lost my father too, but at least I got to know him a little bit. Your story really spoke to my heart today and I've had you on my mind all day long thinking of what I might say to you. I didn't grow up with my father, I barely knew him (until I was older). I had a step father who didn't like me. I have always felt "fatherless" and still do at times. I get very sad sometimes and someday I don't think I'll ever get over it. Then one day, I found a verse in Psalms and haven't been the same since. It sort of healed me a little, and whenever I get sad and feel bad about not having a father, I remember this verse in my head.

Psalms 68:5-6.....God is in his holy temple. He is a father to those whose fathers have died. He takes care of women whose husbands have died. God gives lonely people a family. He sets prisoners free, and they go out singing.

So whenever I get to missing my dad and feeling like a 33 year old orphan, I remember that verse. God is my father and I have a promised inheritance. I don't know if you are a religious person or not, so I hope I don't offend you. If you aren't a religious person, I want you to know you have a family here. I'm sorry life has to be so hard sometimes. I can only imagine the heartache for your poor dear mother and grandmother. If they are still with us, give them lots of love from us. What a fine man you grew up to be, even with the tremendous loss you all suffered. I'm very proud of you. Thank you for serving our country. I'm thanking your father in my heart now, for his service and ultimate sacrifice for FREEDOM. He is with you. He is proud of you. God will keep you safe.

I also want you to know, your father did not die in vain. His sacrifice will NEVER be forgotten in my family or on this board. We have Vietnamese cousins in our family who can say your father didn't die in vain. And as a matter of fact, there are two Vietnamese children playing in my home at this very minute who will tell you, by words from their grandmother (who lives next door) that your father did not die in vain. They all thank him and appreciate him.

Take care of yourself. I'll be thinking of you. Sorry this was so long. God bless you dear Scotty. We love you!!!!!!!! All my love, Spooky

XOXOXOXOXO<--------those are for your beautiful mother who raised a wonderful man.