Posted on 11/26/2016 4:13:39 AM PST by RoosterRedux
Last month, when the battle for Mosul began, Islamic State "caliph" Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi reportedly promised four extra Houris (supernatural, celestial women designed for sexual purposes) – atop the other 72 promised by the prophet Muhammad – to all jihadis who die (are "martyred") fighting the infidel forces, according to Arabic media accounts.
Al-Baghdadi did this during an extra-"fiery" sermon wherein he recounted 15 hadiths and three stories dealing with the Houris in the context of the original Muslim conquest of Mosul, circa 637, at the hands of Muhammad's companions (the sahahba). After promising his followers that "blood will run like rivers in the [forthcoming] battle," al-Baghdadi declared: "All, without exception, will enter paradise as martyrs. Moreover, you will enter paradise with four more Houris than other martyrs. For just as you stand by me now, so will they stand by you, or under you, or above you, so that you might forget what will happen to you by way of violence, death, and degradation in this war."
(Excerpt) Read more at americanthinker.com ...
WARNING: If you have an erection lasting more than 4 celestial horis, please call your imam.
The first 72 houris must be pathetic if terrorist murderers need four extra houris to be satisfied. I wonder if the first 72 all look like Hillary Clinton with no makeup, and those last four are a very small step up to an angry Nancy Pelosi.
Ignorance and the uneducated can be sold on anything, hey when you die I promise you 72 virgins in paradise.............OK where do I sign up
Sooooooo, these muslims are not looking forward to being at peace with their god after they die? They are expecting lots and lots of sex?
Man, you've been watching too many late night TV commercials!
LOL
So what are they going to do if neutered?
LOL!
Where is Nancy Pelosi when you need her.She’s every jihadi’s dream.
What is the muslim version of “Harcourt Fenton Mudd!!!!!!!” ?Now with 76 speakers instead of the traditional 72......
Imamagra?
“The first 72 houris must be pathetic if terrorist murderers need four extra houris to be satisfied. “
In sales talk this is, “Now how much would you pay? But wait! There’s more. Blow your self up now and receive, absolutely free four additional houris! Act now! Operators are standing by!”
This ignores the basic economic reality of “marginal value”.
Think of it in terms of pork chop sandwiches. You are offered 72 pork chop sandwiches to eat for lunch, as reward for shoveling out the contents of a cesspit. Seeing you slacking off after a few hours of shoveling, they offer to sweeten the deal with four more porkchop sandwiches, if you pick up the pace and get that cesspit emptied.
You are hungry, so look forward to the first four sandwiches, but after that you realize it will get harder and harder to eat the other 68. But you manage to slowly pack them away during lunch, after which you are bloated.
So what is the value to you of a bonus of four more pork chop sandwiches?
Houries
Quranic description[edit]
In the Quran the houris are called “companions”, described as being “restraining in their glances” (chaste),[7][8] with “modest gazes”,[5] “wide and beautiful/lovely eyes”,[4][7][9] “eyes like pearls”,[4] “splendid”[2] and “physically prominent”.[10]
Shia scholar description[edit]
To Shia scholars, the most important fact of the description of the houris is that good deeds performed by believers are recompensated by the houris, which are the physical manifestations of ideal forms, that won’t fade away over time, and who will serve as faithful companions to those they accompany.[11]
Sunni descriptions[edit]
Other details of the houris that have been pointed out by Sunni scholars include that the houris would not urinate, defecate, become pregnant or menstruate.[12] It has also been said that all houris are “transparent to the marrow of their bones”,[13][14] “eternally young”,[15] “hairless except the eyebrows and the head”,[15] “pure”[14] and “beautiful”.[14]
It was actually a translation error. It’s not ‘virgins’, but actually ‘Virginians’. Not gonna turn out like they expect...
Law of diminishing marginal utility.
I wonder how Islam is going to react to the coming introduction of female sex robots.
-—houris are “transparent to the marrow of their bones”-—
The robots are silicone. If the silicone is molded in a pure clear state, the transparency may actually make them acceptable.
The ‘72 virgins’ bit is a mistranslation form the Old Syriac - the language of Mohammad - which promised martyrs riches - including the most valuable commodity of the time: white raisins; indeed 72 would make a man very wealthy. Houris apparently are a bonus not sanctioned by Mohammad, but by the Al, the Mad “Big” BaghDadi.
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