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Apology Thread
7/23/2010 | vbmoneyspender

Posted on 07/23/2010 8:47:03 PM PDT by vbmoneyspender

In the old days, when someone wanted you to apologize it was for something you had done to them. And the way it worked was they would ask you for an apology and you would tell them to go screw themselves. But we live in a new age where apologies are done differently. Nowadays, the way apologies work is that you demand that someone you don't personally know apologize to someone else that you don't personally know. This is another form of modern outsourcing and, as such, has become quite the rage in the more technologically sophisticated areas of the United States.

As a result, in order to keep up with the times, I am creating this Apology Thread and starting it off with my own demands for apologies from people I have never met. First, I demand that George Lucas apologize to Star Wars fans for writing and directing Stars Wars Episodes 1, 2 and 3 and that he further apologize to movie fans in general for producing Howard the Duck. Second, I demand that Norm Coleman apologize to the good people of the state of Minnesota for losing to Al Franken in the 2008 senatorial race. And because this race had national implications, Norm Coleman may want to consider expanding his apology to include the citizens of all these United States. Third, I demand that Madonna apologize to Kabbalah worshippers for joining their religion and thereby making a mockery of it.

Now that I have issued my apology demands, I would like to invite my fellow freepers to issue their own apology demands to people they don't know.

And lastly, because I don't want this post to end on a purely negative note, I would like to personally thank Mitchell Mortaza for founding the Women's Lingerie Football League. Mitchell, if you are reading this, I just want to say "Never Give Up! Never Surender!"


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: apology; chat; napl; notnews; vanity
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To: Dr. Eckleburg
While on the subject, I'd like whoever made Ellen the spokesperson for Cover Girl Make-up to have their head examined. She's the husband, for Pete's sake. Husbands don't wear make-up.

I have to admit, I really liked this particular zing.

221 posted on 07/24/2010 9:27:38 PM PDT by Christian_Capitalist (Taxation over 10% is Tyranny -- 1 Samuel 8:17)
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To: shibumi
Jimmie!!!!!

[Uh...uh...Jimmie?]

222 posted on 07/24/2010 9:27:59 PM PDT by Salamander (If you're gonna go down, go loud! Go strong! Go proud! Go on! Go hard or go home!)
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To: Salamander; Vendome

What? Somebody gonna slap me down?

(Please! Please, let Sal do it. Bring the crop! Puhleeeeeze!)


223 posted on 07/24/2010 9:28:49 PM PDT by shibumi (Pablo, wily, clever and detractive as all get out!)
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To: shibumi

The masochist says “Hurt me!”

The sadist says “No.”

>:-]


224 posted on 07/24/2010 9:30:29 PM PDT by Salamander (If you're gonna go down, go loud! Go strong! Go proud! Go on! Go hard or go home!)
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To: shibumi; Salamander

There you go Sal.

Roll him and spindle him! Make him feel like a cheap newspaper!


225 posted on 07/24/2010 9:31:21 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: Vendome
Naaah...I'm gonna throw him a bone.

[He's drooling, now. Pavlov was an evil genius]

226 posted on 07/24/2010 9:36:15 PM PDT by Salamander (If you're gonna go down, go loud! Go strong! Go proud! Go on! Go hard or go home!)
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To: Salamander

Ouch!

Stop...don’t stop...stop...don’t....


227 posted on 07/24/2010 9:40:10 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: Salamander

Holeee....?


228 posted on 07/24/2010 9:40:50 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: Vendome

That’s why I dig her sooooo much!

(That, and she’s just about the only person around here who understands me when i say what I *really* think - which is rarely posted in open forum.)


229 posted on 07/24/2010 9:45:31 PM PDT by shibumi (Pablo, wily, clever and detractive as all get out!)
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To: vbmoneyspender
Well, they've apologized to Uncle Albert, so I guess I'm good:

Go on. Click on it. You know you want to.

230 posted on 07/24/2010 9:50:30 PM PDT by Richard Kimball (We're all criminals. They just haven't figured out what some of us have done yet.)
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To: Vendome

That’s what she said.

;-D


231 posted on 07/24/2010 9:50:38 PM PDT by Salamander (If you're gonna go down, go loud! Go strong! Go proud! Go on! Go hard or go home!)
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To: shibumi

To paraphrase the Big Bopper, “Oh, baby, I know what you like!”

;]


232 posted on 07/24/2010 9:52:27 PM PDT by Salamander (If you're gonna go down, go loud! Go strong! Go proud! Go on! Go hard or go home!)
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To: Richard Kimball

I can’t believe I did that.

I’m sorry Uncle...


233 posted on 07/24/2010 9:59:46 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: Salamander

I thought that’s what he said, shibumi... LOL


234 posted on 07/24/2010 10:01:18 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: shibumi

You’re really sick man, just sick.

Don’t change. LOL


235 posted on 07/24/2010 10:02:10 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it.)
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To: vbmoneyspender

I apologize to my funny bone for not seeing this thread sooner.


236 posted on 07/24/2010 10:06:11 PM PDT by Brytani (There Is No (D) in November! Go Allen!!! www.allenwestforcongress.com)
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To: Vendome; Salamander; shibumi
He looks like a pretty big guy.

Hey, shibumi is at his ideal weight!



If he was nine feet tall ...............

237 posted on 07/24/2010 10:06:34 PM PDT by Eaker (Pablo is very wily)
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To: Vendome; Salamander
No chance.



"We fear change!"

238 posted on 07/24/2010 10:09:54 PM PDT by shibumi (Pablo, wily, clever and detractive as all get out!)
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To: Eaker

Seven foot four, actually.


239 posted on 07/24/2010 10:10:43 PM PDT by shibumi (Pablo, wily, clever and detractive as all get out!)
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To: Eaker

Oh, by the way.

I am rather huge, but I can still bench press my weight.

*Without* arching my back. (Which, in my case, would be a real bad idea anyway.)


240 posted on 07/24/2010 10:13:56 PM PDT by shibumi (Pablo, wily, clever and detractive as all get out!)
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