The Chuckabee Facts ("Fact: Chuck Norris is so painful to watch that...")

idsnews.com ^ | 1/8/2008 | Chase Cooper

[DogByte6RER]

The Chuckabee facts

Chase Cooper

IDS

1/8/2008

Chuck Norris doesn’t endorse – he tells America how it’s gonna be.” So says Mike Huckabee , anyway, in a campaign ad featuring his biggest endorser, Chuck Norris. In the ad, Norris and Huckabee, who is known increasingly in conservative circles as the “Huckster,” go back and forth for 60 agonizing seconds telling “facts” about each other, performing a skit patterned after the “Chuck Norris facts” seen in Facebook groups and chain e-mails. Here are a few “Huck Chuck facts” that you may not know about:

Fact: Chuck Norris is so corny that ethanol producers believe him to be a vast, untapped source of alternative energy.

Fact: Mike Huckabee calls himself a Republican, but functionally he’s a pro-life Democrat. He’s a big government, tax-and-spend proponent of the Nanny State, who supports a nationwide smoking ban, government-sponsored wellness programs and more government regulation of private industries, such as minimum wage increases. He also has a grossly liberal record on illegal immigration.

Fact: Chuck Norris is so painful to watch that nine out of 10 Americans would rather take a roundhouse kick to the face from him than sit through an episode of “Walker, Texas Ranger.”

Fact: Mike Huckabee granted over 1,000 pardons and commutations during his 10 years as governor – roughly one clemency every four days. In 17 years, Huckabee’s three predecessors – which included Bill Clinton, by the way – granted only 507 clemencies combined. The Huckster’s clemency recipients included violent criminals who reputedly “got religion” in prison. Should this man have the power of the presidential pardon?

Fact: Chuck Norris is so pathetic that Jack Bauer tracked and killed him in only 21 hours, then took a three-hour nap.

Fact: According to the Arkansas Leader newspaper, Mike Huckabee, while governor of Arkansas, raised more taxes than Bill Clinton did while governor of Arkansas. His tax record is so bad that even the members of the Arkansas Republican Assembly chose to endorse Fred Thompson rather than Huck. When the Club for Growth, a prominent conservative anti-tax organization, sharply criticized his tax record, Huckabee responded by calling them the “Club for Greed.” There’s nothing greedy about the concept that the money you’ve earned belongs to you.

Fact: Chuck Norris is such a bad actor that even Keanu Reeves flips the channel whenever he sees Chuck on TV.

Fact: Mike Huckabee has little to no foreign policy experience. When confronted with this fact in an interview with Don Imus on Dec. 4, the Huckster stated, “I may not be the expert that some people are on foreign policy, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.” If he likes Holiday Inn Express so much, I’d much rather he sleep there than at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

Fact: A Huckabee nomination would be disastrous to the conservative movement, the Republican Party and the United States of America, and the Democrats would almost certainly take the White House, regardless of who they nominate. If conservatism is to be advanced in the next four years, the Republican Party needs to chuck Huck – soon.

[Jane Austen]

His flip flop on “anchor babies” showed him to be also a blatant liar. He and Hillary are winners of the fasts flip flops in this election.

[HAL9000]

Thanks for a very thorough reply and some good ideas.

I must challenge one item, though. In January 2004, the plaintiff attorneys did file a motion with the Supreme Court asking it to find the state in contempt, and requesting that the entire public school system be shut down in relief.

The court did not grant the shut down request, but instead appointed the special master and set a deadline for compliance and left the shut down as a option in case the deadline was not met.

So that is my recollection of the case: a shut down was a definite possibility. The court seemed ready to impose a drastic solution if the legislature failed to act by the deadline.

Please let me know, at your convenience, if my recollection of the matter is inaccurate.

[Badeye]

Fact:

All Chuck Norris has done is make movies we’ve all seen for four decades, and made millions of dollars. Much of which he’s used for charity work.

Fact:

Chuck Norris had a prime time television series that was wildly popular during its run, is in syndication, and always had good guys and bad guys, with a moral to the story at its conclusion. We sorely lack that today in prime time you may notice.

Fact:

I think Huckabee is a pro Life Democrat hiding in Republican clothing...but trashing Norris is counter productive, given he’s done more for kids alone than anyone that might check into this forum.

[FishTale]

"Fact: Chuck Norris is such a bad actor that even Keanu Reeves flips the channel whenever he sees Chuck on TV."

Ouch!

[Mr Rogers]

So the state-local tax burden increased by 10% under Huckabee.

Not horrible, but hardly an impressive record. And of course, it was ‘for the children’.

I don’t want my Federal taxes to go up by 10%, so I’ll skip voting for the Huckster.

[numberonepal]

Chuck Norris is badass.

So true, but he ain't all that smart when it comes to politics. Unless I've mistaken him for a true conservative Patriot (which I apparently have), Chuck's got a little commie in his heart.

[Mr Rogers]

It would be shameful not to back him up vs. McCain.

I'll take "neither of the above".

[numberonepal]

- PRO-LIFE
Gotta give him that, but his approach is all wrong. He (along with other short-sighted and dim-witted folks) think one sweep of the pen will end Roe V Wade. They are dead wrong and will make little head-way in ending the murders.
- PRO-1st Amendment
I’ll buy that
- PRO-2nd Amendment
I’ll buy that too
- PRO-10th Amendment
I’ve yet to see evidence of this. In fact I’ve seen the contrary in his nanny state politics. I believe that Huck has an inherent belief that government can forcefully influence the behavior of citizens outside force and fraud charges.
- ANTI-GLOBALIST
What does this mean? Does it mean he wants to isolate America from the rest of the world, or that he would rather America not worry about what the rest of the world thinks?
- PRO-ISRAEL (no to land giveaways)
I’ll buy that, but am not familiar with his stance
- PRO-MARRIAGE
OK
- SMALL GOVERNMENT Fiscal Conservative
Bull Spit! I do believe the former governor created and supported new commie nanny state programs while in office.
- PRO-AMERICAN BUSINESS
Supporting the Fair Tax is evidence enough for this but not quite comprehensive. I wonder what he thinks about OSHA and other anti-freedom government departments.
- PRO-OPPORTUNITY
I’m not really sure what that means. Pro-opportunity for whom or what?
- PRO-WAGE EARNER
Like not only supporting a minimum wage, but advocating for an increase in said pilfering of private business. Chalk another one up for Karl Marx.
- PRO-Individual Healthcare Empowerment
That sounds kinda commie to me. Do you mean that Huck advocates people buying their own insurance and them NOT having to pay for others? If so I’m on board with that.
- PRO-Private/Home Education
Sounds good to me, but is he opposed to the US Dept of Education? Because if he is not, then you have another hole in your 10th Amendment proclamation above.

I also notice you didn’t mention anything above about foreign relations outside globalism and Israel. What will the Huckster do about the muzzies, or China, or Russia? This is the single largest issue that faces America today and we need to know more from Huck about that. So far his statements on foreign policy are a bit on the sophomoric side.

[steve8714]

You forgot PRO- Illegal alien.

[numberonepal]

whereas Fred Thompson takes the Democrat Stephen Douglas position on the fundamental topic of the Right to Life.

I thought you were all for strong 10th Amendment support.

[HAL9000]

this is a non-sequitor. Having seen this same game played out in other states, its clear you are making excuses for tax hikes.

I'm not making any excuses, I'm just telling you the facts of the Lake View case, where the court gave Huckabee virtually no choice in the matter. That was the political reality of the situation.

If we did things your way, Huckabee would have been found in contempt of court, with the possibility that the school system would have been forced to shut down for a while. That might be an acceptable outcome to you, but it isn't to the citizens of Arkansas.

[numberonepal]

You forgot PRO- Illegal alien.

So did I in #88. Thanks for reminding me.

[steve8714]

Code of Silence is Norris’ best work. Ever.

[Badeye]

He’s made quite a few ‘good’ popcorn movies.

I always get irritated when I see an American thats ‘self made’ getting trashed. Not to mention a Veteran.

[Teacher317]

I’ve read that the “record surplus” he left was mostly due to the policies of the previous governor and the state congress.

[WOSG]

lol. Where were you when the Mitt-bashers were blaming Mitt for court-ordered gay marriage, need that explanation that court orders arent to by defied...

I understand that the courts do this, but they ordered equity in funding not a general tax increase - as I said, I’ve seen it in other states and its all in how you handle the challenge. You can go the liberal way (raise taxes) or the conservative way (rework the budget to hold line on overall spending). So I wouldnt be hard on Huck if he tried other options and was left with no choice. But he DID have other, more conservative, choices than simply beg for more taxes. He would NOT have been held in contempt of court if he went in and said “Because of the education funding crisis, we have to make some budget cuts in the ArKids program.” or found other ways to keep spending in check so that the funding equity issue could be addressed while keeping the budget under control.

And btw, its not like this was Huckabee’s only tax increase so even if you forgive him for this tax increase, he’s on the hook for many more. He had a large number of them, which put together significantly increased the tax burden on the state.

Here in Texas Rick Perry and the Republican leadership faced a crunch the same year and found $10 BILLION in spending cuts over a 2 year period, to get us through the 2002 budget crunch. How did they do it? They did unpopular (with the liberal MSM) things like tighten eligibility for the Schip program (reup every 6 months instead of every year), slim funding of colleges, keep the general bureaucracy slimmer, cut where they could. What they did NOT do is raise general revenues. That is simply the WRONG way to go.

In Massachusetts, same deal, budget crunch - Mitt Romney made hundreds of line item vetos that cut almost a billion dollars, kept overall spending below rate of inflation. Government burden on the economy shrunk under his Governorship, and he used his veto pen alot.

For All Four Of The Fiscal-Year Budgets That Crossed His Desk, Governor Romney Used The Line-Item Veto Power More Than 800 Times. Over the course of four budgets, Governor Romney made over 300 line-item reductions, 350 line-item eliminations and struck language 150 times. (Chapter 26 Of The Commonwealth Of Massachusetts Acts Of 2003, Governor’s Veto Message, 6/30/03; Chapter 149 Of The Commonwealth Of Massachusetts Acts Of 2004, Governor’s Veto Message, 6/25/04; Chapter 45 Of The Commonwealth Of Massachusetts Acts Of 2005, Governor’s Veto Message, 6/30/05; Governor Mitt Romney, Memo To The Senate And House Of Representatives Of The Commonwealth Of Massachusetts; Fiscal Year 2007 General Appropriations Act Veto Items: Line Item Accounts, 7/8/06)

- Beacon Hill Institute Executive Director David Terck: “He Vetoed Hundreds Of Millions Of Dollars In Spending.” WALL STREET JOURNAL’S PAUL GIGOT: “Was Governor Romney willing to use his veto pen to do that in Massachusetts?” BEACON HILL INSTITUTE EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR DAVID TERCK: “He most certainly was. He vetoed hundreds of millions of dollars in spending.” (Fox News’ “Journal Editorial Report,” 3/31/07)
http://www.mittromney.com/News/Press-Releases/Romney_Record_Line_Item_Veto

The Huckabee record shows NONE of that kind of fiscal stewardship. He grew the state payroll bigtime, he grew the govt healthcare welfare program, etc. The shortfall in education was only $400 million. This is why Cato ranked him so miserably and gave him an F. NOBODY SAID GOVERNING CONSERVATIVELY WAS EASY. Huckabee, alas, didn’t even try. ... because he is NOT a conservative.

[AnalogReigns]

Over the last 2 months I have seen almost no “hit” pieces—defined as obvious unsubstantial dirt spread by political opposition—on Romney. Yet at the same time dozens of stories without a lot of merit are out “ahhah”-ing Huckabee. Romney is outspending Huckabee something like 8 to 1. It doesn’t take a lot of cynicism to know exactly where the dirt is coming from, that is the operatives of the squeakey-clean way-too-good-to-be-real ex-governor of America’s most liberal state.

The reason the dirt is not out about Mitt, is that the Rockefeller Republican establishment is behind him...and he has the bucks—while his opponents don’t.

Romney is a pro-business economic “conservative” from New England, which makes him a moderate at best anywhere else (but California). Huckabee is a social “conservative” from the old state-southern-Democrat dominated deep South...which makes him a moderate on other issues everywhere else. Neither one is anywhere near Ronald Regan, despite Romney’s pompadour. Guliani is liberal, except on law enforcement and defense, and Fred Thomson—a real conservative—is old and tired—whose heart is clearly not in the campaign(reminds me of Bob Dole), and really doesn’t have a chance. McCain’s claim to fame is whenever it is to his advantage to stick it to his own party—professing to be the righteous crusader—while eviserating the 1st Ammendment with McCain-Feingold.

We have no real viable Reaganesque conservatives—which is why the RINO attacks need to stop—even against those as flawed as Huckabee, or even Romney.

[AnalogReigns]

All well and good—Thompson is the only true Conservative in the race. However, so far, he’s barely in the race, and his heart clearly doesn’t seem in it—and frankly, he appears lethargic, old and tired—not good traits for any campaign—let alone for the toughest of all.

McCain gave us a direct contradiction to the 1st Amendment in McCain-Feingold. He also seems to love to stick-it to his own party whenever its to his advantage. No one can argue with his courage of 35+ years ago, it’s the record since I have trouble with. McCain is right though, calling Romney “the candidate of change...”

All I can say though, as soon as Huck began to rise in the polls, shazamm, suddenly, drip-drip-drip, little story after little story questioning his integrity and level of conservatism began to surface—a classic indication of opposition campaign dirty tricks. The only guy with the money and inclination to go negative like that is the pretty boy from Mass.

I’ve worked in politics, and actually taken courses in effective political campaigning. One of the classic techniques of negative campaigning is to slowly, secretively, through a variety of sources, release little negatives about your opponent. None of them taken separately can do much damage. But, after weeks of drip-drip-drip-dripping, the effect on public perception can be the same as a huge negative story....

This is exactly what is being attempted on Huckabee, and no-one seems to have the discernment to notice.

Is he a Reagan-conservative? No. And no viable candidate is. Geo. W. Bush certainly is not. We don’t have that choice. I just don’t like a wealthy candidate’s money, and the GOP political establishment (no real conservatives there either), to manipulate real conservatives’ opinions.

[WOSG]

“Over the last 2 months I have seen almost no “hit” pieces—defined as obvious unsubstantial dirt spread by political opposition—on Romney”

You are not paying attention then... literally dozens of drive-by hit pieces launched against Romney just on FR, and lots more on other blogs etc. And now on the campaign trail and even in the debates; McCain and Huckabee campaigns and supporters seem to be the most vehement at it.

Last week a hit on Romney accusing him of implementing gay marriage here on FR. Even thought Romney came out strongly against the Mass supreme court ruling immediately, was consistently against gay marriage, for the FMA, worked to stop it in Massachusetss (but was undercut by others); still these hitpieces. We know that it is unfair because any decent lawyer can tell you the court defined gay marriage as part of the definition of marriage under the law. It’s been rehashed an reposted many times - untrue and unfair...

“It doesn’t take a lot of cynicism to know exactly where the dirt is coming from,” It seems that Huckabee wants the right to dish it out by cry foul when its incoming. Yeah, that’s a great way to get a candidate who will be a sure-fire LOSER to Hillary in November. A candidate so weak he begs not to be vetted.

“The reason the dirt is not out about Mitt, is that the Rockefeller Republican establishment is behind him...and he has the bucks—while his opponents don’t.” - The liberal Rockefeller Republicans were funding Rudy not Mitt. The dirt on Romney is more than out there, unless you are under a rock.

Romney has gotten the thinking conservative endorsements - Sen Jim DeMint, Robert Bork, Gov Matt Blunt, Paul Weyrich, National Review, ACU chair David Keene, and many other conservatives have lined up behind Romney. Meanwhile the moderates and liberal Republicans who were behind Rudy now have - McCain.

Romney has more unfair and unsubstantiated cr*p thrown at him than any other candidate, and on top of that has to contend with folks who hate him merely for the crime of being a Mormon.

Romney is far more of a fiscal conservative than Huckabee, the record and his agenda is clear on that.
As for “We have no real viable Reaganesque conservatives” I would agree, but by far the best of the top 3 - Huckabee, Romney, and McCain - is Romney. He at least is sticking with the main Reagan agenda, he has great executive accomplishments, skill and capability.

PS. Bork’s endorsement of Romney and note his comment on Romney and gay marriage:

Joining Romney for President, Judge Bork said, “Throughout my career, I have had the honor of serving under several Presidents and am proud to make today’s endorsement. No other candidate will do more to advance the conservative judicial movement than Governor Mitt Romney. He knows firsthand how the judicial branch can profoundly affect the future course of a state and a nation. I greatly admired his leadership in Massachusetts in the way that he responded to the activist court’s ruling legalizing same-sex ‘marriage.’ His leadership on the issue has served as a model to the nation on how to respect all of our citizens while respecting the rule of law at the same time.”

Judge Bork continued, “Our next President may be called upon to make more than one Supreme Court nomination, and Governor Romney is committed to nominating judges who take their oath of office seriously and respect the rule of law in our nation. I also support Governor Romney because of his character, his integrity and his stands on the major issues facing the United States.”

Welcoming Judge Bork’s support, Governor Romney said, “For decades, Judge Bork has been a leader in moving the conservative legal movement forward. As one of our nation’s premier conservative jurists, he has been an important voice for our conservative values in Washington. I look forward to his counsel and working with him on the most important judicial matters facing our nation today.”

[WOSG]

“All I can say though, as soon as Huck began to rise in the polls, shazamm, suddenly, drip-drip-drip, little story after little story questioning his integrity and level of conservatism began to surface”

That’s simple: Before Huckabee was viewed as a serious candidate, nobody paid attention to his obivous flaws. Just like Ron Paul’s newletter that had anti-semitic ravings would be on the front page of the NYTimes only *if* he was a frontrunner.

Who cares about Huckabee’s Jimmy Carter like views on foreign policy ... unless he suddendly has a chance at the White House?
Who cares about Huckabee’s resume inflation, his ethical scrapes in Arkansas, his thin skin with the press, his tax hikes, his commutation and pardon spree including the infamous Wayne Dumond case? It all DIDNT MATTER until the idea of Huckabee actually WINNING the nomination and representing our party nationally became a real possibility.
Who cares about the fact that Huckabee’s son killed a dog ... if he’s not going to be President anyway?
Who cares that Huckabee’s record doesn’t match his rhetoric today?

Now all the skeletons are coming out of the closet. They HAVE to, NOW, because if we don’t do it, HILLARY WILL do it. And Huckabee will get destroyed in the general election.

Btw, the campaign you describe is the campaign that McCain and Huckabee have been waging ... against Romney. Go figure.

“This is exactly what is being attempted on Huckabee, and no-one seems to have the discernment to notice.” Please have the discernment to notice that Huckabee is the worst possibe candidate we could put forward.