Tell your child the truth. He may not understand but he will someday and you will never have an incident when he realizes that he was lied to and feels betrayed.
Tough spot. Prayers for you!
Posted on 04/17/2007 6:30:34 PM PDT by randyclark
I am much more of a lurker than a poster, but I have always respected and appreciated the thoughts of fellow conservatives here. I had to put down my German Shepherd recently, and my son of 2 1/2 years has been looking for him from time to time. I ask for any advice, as I try to keep this calm and reassuring for him. My son referred to him as the "black dragon" due to the size, jaw, and tail. The dog was 100 lbs of absolute loyalty, teeth and fur to my family. Thanks in advance to you all.
Randyclark, if your son ask what happened to Black Dragon, I would say, "well, I don't know what happened to him but he left his son for us to take care of" and I would start playing with the new puppy. The new puppy doesn't have to be a German Shepherd, could be any breed. I love little dogs.
Tell your child the truth. He may not understand but he will someday and you will never have an incident when he realizes that he was lied to and feels betrayed.
Tough spot. Prayers for you!
Get him a puppy. At 2 1/2 he does not know what death means and the new puppy will feel the void. I have been there and do that too. Good luck and God Bless.
So sorry for the loss of your canine friend.
Thanks, Victoria. These things are hard enough for adults to handle . . . they can really turn a small child’s world upside down.
Excellent advice. Children must learn that their pets do die but to explain it so beautifully is what is important. Remember to tell the child we NEVER REPLACE the last pet. We will always remember him. We just give a new pet a brand new family to love and for us to love and take care of each other. They will understand eventually.
Cynthia Rylant has written two books for children about pets in heaven. They are titled Dog Heaven and Cat Heaven. They are quite sweet stories.
Gotta finish some work here.
Nighty night.
Good to see you this evening. Sweet dreams!
Break the news carefully. I would recommend watching the movie “All Dogs Go To Heaven” with him, so that he will know that his friend is in a good place, even if he is no longer with the family.
A new dog will not soothe the loss as much as giving him confidence that his friend is okay.
Did he like to hug or kiss the dog as a lot of children that age do? If so, pictures are powerful reminders of the ones we loved. Just print out a picture of the dog, frame it, put it by his bed, then at bedtime say a little prayer with him or just tell him a story with the dog as a character, then let him kiss the dog picture goodnight. I just lost a 16 yr old terrier, and I posted a picture of her on the fridge door. Tears swelled in my eyes for the first month every time I looked at that picture of her...now it just makes me smile.
I decided my son was too young and delicate for the truth so, in a panic, I embellished a bit. Yes, I lied. You see, my son loved this little stray that wandered into our yard. I told him Elvis had been hit by a car and was in the hospital.
I knew all along what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn't bear to tell him the truth. My husband had actually buried the dog before my son came home. My son kept asking to see his puppy. I had to tell him that his friend didn't make it and that he had died. The poor boy was in such anguish over the loss of his beloved pet.
He'd heard of a local pet mortuary that cremated pets and wanted to have Elvis cremated. Oh boy. Now I was in a mess. Well, I explained what cremation was and explained that he'd only be getting the ashes of his pet. He didn't care. He wanted something to hold on to.
I did a cruel thing. At the time, in my mind, it wasn't cruel. I was only trying to keep my son from finding out the details of the death. I filled a small bag full of ashes from our fire pit and placed them in a box for him.
Dear God, how awful I felt. First, I killed his puppy. Then I lied to him. I compounded the lie by deceiving him into thinking I'd actually given him the remains of his dog. I was bound for hell for sure for doing this to my little boy. But, in the back of my mind, I justified it by telling myself that he was only 4; that he'd eventually forget Elvis and move on when we got another puppy.
You know what? He's never forgotten. He's 11 now and he still has that bag of ashes in his room in a "special place" along with pictures of him and his dog.
For the sake of your own conscious man, tell your boy the truth!!
I believe it's time for me to confess as well.
Sorry, I’m very much a Christian, and I’m a grandmother many times over, but the thought of “doggie heaven” has comforted me through the loss of many dogs over the years.
Yes, Pet...can I have a “Y!” LOL!
I think that is way too advanced and beyond the understanding of a two year old and in the unlikely case they do understand may well only upset them.
I also want to say to Randy that it's unfortunate there are a**holes on this, as on any other forum, that never let an opportunity go by to say something petty, mean, hurtful and designed to make someone that already feels lousy and upset - maybe so upset they did not express themselves very well in their vanity post or comment - to make them feel even worse. I not referring to Raven of course, but to people who post things like "teach him to lurk as well". Ungenerous of me, but to them I can only say I hope you get the same treatment the next time something miserable happens to you, as it surely will.
That’s really a nice story, isn’t it?
I sure hope it’s true. There are several old and dear friends I’ll meet there.
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