Recovering Freeper in Need

Freepmail | August 28, 2006 | unknown

[RobFromGa]

Dear Rob,

"Cheated" twice with a couple beers a couple times over the last couple days, though, nominally, it'll be three weeks "clean" on Tuesday. This adds to guilt, but is the only way I can get myself relaxed enough to keep from bawling out of extremely-uncool and undeserved self-pity.

I'm under great medical observation, and a crapload of antidepressants [x,y, and z].

Tell me, Rob, what it is I'm recovering "from" and why, since this world is such a [messed up] place? When I was a drunk, sure, I'd be moody in the mornings, productive at work (and I NEVER drank during the day), and everyone's friend once I got home. Now it's just constant depression and having to face a [messed] up world (with way too many liberals in it .

I'm a very proud, spiritual Christian, but I'm even too ashamed to pray, at least at length, since both He and I know that I am the problem.

The real abstraction here is if this horrid beautiful watery place is better with or without my presence. That last sentence isn't a "cry for help - please hug me I'm hurting, Oprah" throwaway - it's a serious question about which me is better: the happy, intoxicated, likely-to-be-shorter-lived friend of everyone, or the stoic, medicated, spooked, depressed sober me who no one will ever trust again since he had such "deep issues".

What I need is reason/cognition/rationalization, and maybe I'll increase my [x] or extend it for a couple more weeks.

You're an Internet pal, trustworthy by sheer virtue of being a Conservative, and, your advice and wisdom is easier to follow exactly because I do NOT know you personally.

If you don't mind redacting my screenname, feel free to poll/ping the Recovery List. I'll "come out" when I'm ready, I promise.

God Bless You and have a great week,

[SeaBiscuit]

Great thread, inspirational to anyone, no matter how long they've been sober. Thanks for posting this.


For me, I need repeat these 3 reminders for emphasis and regularly because I tend to forget how self-centered, controlling, fearful and distrustful I can be.

I can not do it alone.
I can not do it alone.
I can not do it alone.

Let go.
Let go.
Let go.

Let God In.
Let God In.
Let God In.

Unknown, your on the right track, keep talking about it everyday with others who understand. We can't do it perfectly, but we can practice everyday. Your not alone.

[fatima]

Get in patient care and don't leave early like my son did.He died Aug 2nd.His name is Ed.I will pray for you FRiend.

[RobFromGa]

I am so sorry to hear that Ed was consumed by an addiction. It happens to a lot of people. Thanks for sharing that with us, maybe it will help our FRiend to see what the end result can be.

[angkor]

Some friends who were "old timers" in AA even back in the 70's had nasty nutritional deficiencies by the time they got to the program.

They were big advocates of balanced vitamins (nothing too whacky and guided by a nutritional physician), vitamin B therapy, and changing the diet to more proteins and vegetables and less carbs (esp. sugars).

Seems pretty conventional these days but they looked pretty healthy for folks in their 60's who'd done 30 years of hardcore boozing.

[angkor]

"Divert your drinking money to membership at a good gym. If there are several in your area shop around and find the one you like best."

Or buy a FitnessQuest 1100 HR/A elliptical trainer which has about a 3x2 foot footprint, can be wheeled around the house easily, and will give a very nice sweat drenched workout in 20 to 30 minutes. $400, UPS shipping included, and it takes about 30 minutes to assemble from the box. I did a lot of research and this was the best of the ellipticals under $1,000, and I'm happy with it.

Now, although it does an excellent job of chasing away the blues, I do confess that sticking to a regular routine is still spotty for me (I've had it for 6 weeks so far).

But I don't have to fight myself to get to the gym either, the elliptical is less than a 20 second walk from anywhere in the house.

Highly recommended.

[Salvation]

Prayer Ping!

Please notify me via FReepmail if you would like to be added to or taken off the Prayer Ping List.

Please post your prayers to RobFromGa;

[RobFromGa]

thanks, our FRiend won't know what hit him... :-)

[RobFromGa]

I still take about 5 things every morning--
One-A-Day multi
B Complex +C
Fish Oil
Flax Oil
Ginkgo Biloba

[Knitting A Conundrum]

Prayers for our FRiend....

[FJ290]

"The real abstraction here is if this horrid beautiful watery place is better with or without my presence."

God put you here for a reason. He values you. He loves you. Your life MEANS something to Him and to the world.

Prayers for you!

[RobFromGa]

Reminds me of that commercial:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-394499539397023780&q=exercise+ad+funny&hl=en

[Hardastarboard]

I'll refrain from my usual smart@$$ comments here. Note that recovery from alcohol addiction is a process. It takes time. How your friend feels now may not be how he feels later. What I'm saying is that he seems to be trying to figure out how he'll cope as "the new me". I would say that "the new me" that he sees now isn't "the new me" he will become.

Alcohol is a mood-altering drug, the long-term effects of which take a while to wear off. He needs to give it some time before deciding whether he can cope or not. After detox and treatment, he may find the world a much brighter, better place after all.

Be aware that I only know of this academically, not from personal experience. Doesn't my comments any less true, but it does make my understanding more limited than it would be.

[Hot Tabasco]

Geez Rob, I have no advice to offer this Freeper friend other than for him to talk to his pastor directly and ask for guidance. He is obviously hurting and feels that his church (I'm assuming he has one) will forsake him but assure him that his Church is there specifically for his salvation if he can only accept it..........

[Chode]

i'm nobody to give advise, sooo... Prayers Up.

[LowOiL]

Tell Him God gives him time to heal... to use it... one day at a time...

[tiki]

Prayers offered.

[wjcsux]

I have had good luck with Celebrate Recovery. I got involved with them after the X decided to run off several years back. Celebrate Recovery is a Christian based program that is really good.

[syriacus]

I'm even too ashamed to pray, at least at length,

The short version of the Serenity Prayer is a prayer that has been a great help to members of my family. We have often had to remind each other to use it, even though it works so well, because it is often answered so quietly.

Many prayers for our Recovering Freeper.

[Jackknife]

Two things that helped me kick a 10 yr. heroin addiction .......

First, and most important, I went back to my trust in God (after many years astray). This has been the only way.

Second, whenever I had the slightest desire to use, I made it a point to remember ALL of the BAD things that resulted in my addiction. These are so numerous, and distasteful, that they would immediately overshadow any good physical/emotional feelings that came from getting high.

Sounds simple, but it's not (without God ......)

I'll keep our fellow FReeper in my daily prayers.

[cgk]

Sending my prayers to our fellow FReeper, which in turn means FRiend. Prayers for strength & courage through God, your friends & loved ones... and (yourself)... to face the trials which seem to come every minute of every day. God Bless.