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WHEN INSULTS HAD CLASS
Email from various | Unk | Assorted

Posted on 08/06/2006 4:28:00 AM PDT by SLB

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." - Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know." - Abraham Lincoln

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." - Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play, bring a friend... If you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"I cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... If there is one." - Winston Churchill, in reply.


TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: budgie; charlietheparrot; godsgravesglyphs; parrot; quotes; unitedkingdom; winstonchurchill
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To: SLB

Wonderful!


161 posted on 08/06/2006 11:34:07 AM PDT by krunkygirl
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To: Past Your Eyes; don-o
From MCRD San Diego on hearing a recruit refer to himself in first person -
"I"? Are you an "I" ball? Well why don't you just wink yourself into oblivion?
162 posted on 08/06/2006 11:36:20 AM PDT by MrEdd (More cheep than a flock of baby chickens.)
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To: SLB

Just within the last few weeks, I read this somewhere but cannot attribute appropriately:

"The fact that you don't have kids can be explained by both Natural Selection and Intelligent Design."


163 posted on 08/06/2006 11:39:35 AM PDT by Stegall Tx (Aim small, shoot small.)
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To: skepsel

No, this one really wasn’t near as tough as he liked to believe he was – and it was a Transportation boat unit.


164 posted on 08/06/2006 11:40:48 AM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink)
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To: fish hawk
I once read a story about Sir Lawrence Olivier where a young method actor (someone we know but I can't think of the name now) was going out and getting drunk and acting up because he had a part in a play like that. Olivier told him: " dear boy, have you ever heard of ACTING?

That was when Hoffman and Sir Lawrence were working on 'Marathon Man', fish hawk.

Hoffman, well schooled in "Method" acting, decided to stay up throughout the night previous to shooting the "Is it safe?" scene. Showed up on set looking like three miles of bad road, which elicited Sir Lawrence's infamous barb.


Jack.
165 posted on 08/06/2006 12:51:06 PM PDT by Jack Deth (Knight Errant and Disemboweler of the WFTD Thread)
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To: kstewskis; kassie; lysie; Carolinamom; Raquel; Victoria Delsoul; Molly Pitcher; Miss Marple; ...
Was it Will Rogers that said,

"I'd never join a club that would let me in as a member."

166 posted on 08/06/2006 12:54:50 PM PDT by Northern Yankee ( Stay The Course!)
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To: Stegall Tx

"The fact that you don't have kids can be explained by both Natural Selection and Intelligent Design."


LOL! That's a good one.


167 posted on 08/06/2006 1:24:02 PM PDT by jocon307 (The Silent Majority - silent no longer)
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To: Northern Yankee

That one was by Groucho Marx I think.


168 posted on 08/06/2006 2:48:53 PM PDT by Carolinamom (Moderation in pursuit of justice is no virtue. ---Barry Goldwater)
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To: Northern Yankee; kstewskis
Groucho Marx said it, who by the way said so many hilarious things among them:

“Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men, the other 999 follow women.”

“Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.”

169 posted on 08/06/2006 2:51:28 PM PDT by Victoria Delsoul
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To: appeal2; backhoe
Another Dr. Sam zinger:

"A woman preaching is like a dog walking on its hind legs. One does not wonder at its being done well, but that it is done at all."

Or . . . "Much may be made of a Scotsman, if caught young."

Read his biography by Boswell. It's as full of his wit as a pudding of plums.

170 posted on 08/06/2006 3:04:40 PM PDT by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: linda_22003; backhoe

Montagu didn't stand a chance against the street fighter Wilkes.

171 posted on 08/06/2006 3:08:30 PM PDT by AnAmericanMother ((Ministrix of Ye Chase, TTGC Ladies' Auxiliary (recess appointment)))
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To: Jack Deth
Thank you. I couldn't remember the details but did remember the story. Aloha
172 posted on 08/06/2006 3:11:34 PM PDT by fish hawk (Terror : in a cave in Afghanistan. Treason: in a cave-in , in the Democratic Party)
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To: SLB

bttt


173 posted on 08/06/2006 3:37:43 PM PDT by tje (Cold hearted orb, that rules the night....)
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To: SLB

"Every time you think, you weaken the nation." - Moe Howard to (in 3 different Three Stooges shorts) Curley, Larry, Shemp.

"Stand still, thou shittin' aud bovril." - from one of James Herriott's books, quoting an "aud" farmer.
(Sorry, I used the word shit and I wasn't referring to the Clintons.)


174 posted on 08/06/2006 4:04:37 PM PDT by Past Your Eyes (Some people are too stupid to be ashamed.)
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To: outofsalt

Come on. Hoffman made loads of movies and IS a great actor. Give credit where credit is due.....distilling his works down to 2 flicks while forgetting Little Big Man, Midnight Cowboy, etc., just isn't fair to the judged or the judges.


175 posted on 08/06/2006 4:22:32 PM PDT by Loud Mime ("Countdown": A documentary about Keith Olbermann's dwindling IQ.....)
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To: Carolinamom; Victoria Delsoul
That's right!

I stand corrected.

176 posted on 08/06/2006 4:30:07 PM PDT by Northern Yankee ( Stay The Course!)
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To: Victoria Delsoul; kstewskis; Carolinamom; kassie; lysie; Raquel; Molly Pitcher; Miss Marple; ...
Another great story occurred after/or during the Revolutionary War, when Thomas Jefferson made his way to France.

As he stayed at an Englishman's house as a guest, he asked to use the bathroom. (Not sure where they were at that time...)Anyway they had purposely put a picture of George Washington in the bathroom to insult the guest. When Jefferson came back into the room the host asked how he felt about having a painting of General Washington in the bathroom.

Jefferson smiled and said, "Well... if that doesn't make an Englishman defecate I don't know what will."

177 posted on 08/06/2006 4:37:55 PM PDT by Northern Yankee ( Stay The Course!)
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To: All
One from my father: "If you had another brain it would rattle."

And one from me: "You learned everything you know by listening to yourself discuss subjects you know nothing about."

178 posted on 08/06/2006 5:12:44 PM PDT by sig226 (There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who do not.)
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To: Allegra
I didn't see enough from Mark Twain. I must admit that I cheated and used the Internet. Still, they are from Twain:

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's I mean.
179 posted on 08/06/2006 5:33:02 PM PDT by ChessExpert (MSM: America's one (Democratic) party press)
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To: kabar
Great book that one.

Folks used to ask me what kind of a Republican I was. I'd tell 'em I was from the P.J. O'Rourke wing of the Party. You know, the one where you've actually got a chance of getting laid....

L

180 posted on 08/06/2006 5:37:55 PM PDT by Lurker (I support Israel without reservation. Hizbollah must be destroyed to the last man.)
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