Posted on 11/05/2004 11:52:42 AM PST by iheartusa
There is an unspoken taboo in our society where if you admit that having kids wasn't quite what you thought it would be and that if you could do it all over again that you would have chosen NOT to have kids, that you are a monster, an evil, despicable monster. The truth is a large percentage of parents HATE being parents. They will never say it out loud and they can't even admit that to themselves because "only an evil demon" would come to that conclusion, they think. However, underneath it all, underneath all the B.S. is the truth that we all know: Children are overrated. For every precious moment where the little brat does something special, there are 1,000 moments where they drive you crazy. They literally tear your life upside down. Marriage, sex life, your wives appearance, your social life, the list goes on and on and on. Oh yeah, the worst part is yet to come - the teenage years. I could write volumes on this subject. The reason people have children is because of this unwritten societal norm where the standard is to get married and immediately begin to produce offspring because "that's the thing to do". Here's another fact for you if you're interested in the subject: the highest points of martial satisfaction are: 1) after the kids leave and 2) before the kids were born. Look it up, it's true.
I decided not to have kids or a wife... And haven't regretted it one bit!!! I look at all my sorry faced friends straining to make ends meet, having the endless honey do lists, soccer games, Dr bills, bitching, whinny little brats, debt up their asses!!.....and me....well I focused on work and saving money and have no debt, date all different kinds of women, no strings attached, buying a brand new custom house that my friends and family can only dream about, and will be able to retire at 45..... Yea, I may grow up old and have no one but look....most of you will be divorced and so broke after raising kids, alimony, child support, kids college...that you will have nothing to show for it when you are 65 and still have to work till your are dead......sorry thats reality. My relatives have given up asking. They know better. Then someone always pulls me aside and says, "I would love to have your life".
I think most people end up having kids because 1) They're too stupid to know how to use birth control properly and/or 2) They have an idealistic, completely unrealistic vision of what parenthood entails. People imagine dressing their daughter in pretty clothes, or playing catch with their son. They don't think about being awoken at 2 a.m. by a sick, screaming kid who just threw up all over the bed, and who doesn't give a shit that you have to get up for work in four hours. They don't think about the mortgage company threatening to foreclose, or the electricity being shut off, because the husband can't pay all the bills on one income. More people should think about these things, and fewer people should be having children. Parenthood should be left to those few couples who are willing to take the good with the bad.
NoMarriage.com manual will help you determine if you are ready and want to have children in the near future.
The author is a child-hating clod. Period.
Just how in the heck does this empty shell of a man think we should give his opinion credence? He has no experience.
That fool will die too. Alone.
I think there are some people God did not intend to have children so they could be free to complete a certain mission on this earth that having kids would prevent.
That said, this guy does have such and I-I-I, me-me-me perspective to it all that it doesn't sound like he is on anything like a mission from God.
My brother felt exactly like this guy until he had kids himself. Now he can't imagine life without them. He's the most doting Dad you'll ever see.
I have no kids myself because I can't find a woman able to see me in a romantic light, but that's a whole different thread...
I've seen this charge often, and I don't get it. If he actually did have kids and neglected them to go out partying or whatever, then yes, that would be selfish. But he recognizes that he wouldn't make a good parent, and therefore chooses to not have kids. While his tone is a bit negative, he's fundamentally made the responsible decision.
He's not just saying he hasn't chosen to have a family. He's angry and upset with people who do, and thinks people in GENERAL should not be having families. He's condescending towards people who do. That rankles.
i.e. Lines like this:
I think most people end up having kids because 1) They're too stupid to know how to use birth control properly and/or 2) They have an idealistic, completely unrealistic vision of what parenthood entails.
I like kids fine and enjoy playing with my nieces, but hubby and I are enjoying the romance of being a couple (nearly 12 years!)
I say that when your money for your care runs out and you have no kids or family or church to turn to for your care when you get old and sick, we take you to the Trail's End Euthanasia Center. Selfishness should not be rewarded.
Why is he so embittered then? He should be thrilled.
A good case for not having kids is simply not wanting them.
There are some people who for whatever reason aren't interested in children, and that's fine by me. I don't think you're less of an adult, or an evil selfish person for not wanting kids. I have an aunt who has no children, but she loves me and her other nieces and nephews very much. When someone in the family needs support or a place to crash we all know we can count on our auntie. There are bad and selfish people who have kids and there are bad and selfish people who don't. Being a parent does not make a person morally superior to everyone else.
They are selfish egotists...
Darwin weeding out the unfit.
I hate kids! I hate how rotten they are! I hate how they confound and outwit me at every turn! I hate their toothless grins as they realize that, yet again, they have put one over on me!!!!
I hate it when I say they can call me any bad names, since their little brains can't upset me, but I insist that they must NEVER call me 'Mr Stupidhead,' and they spend all day calling me Mr Stupidhead!! GRRRRRRRRR!!!!
And I hate it how they come over to me and untie my sholaces and then look me in the eye and grin, even though I have told them to never do that!!!!
One close friend's daughter (I had the lack of wisdom to become her Godfather years ago before I knew how rotten she would grow up to be) is only age 13 and fully 6' tall, and I hate it how she taps my head rapidly (I am 5'8") like Benny Hill used to do to little Jackie Wright, even after I told her never to do that!!!
Awww...I suppose I love children a whole lot! ;-)
I actually have no problem with the state not subsidizing anyone in their old age. Take care of yourself, whether you have children or not.
Anyway, a person who has not had to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars raising kids will probably be in a pretty good position to take care of themselves when they get older.
If you don't have kids, you don't get any social security checks.
Hear Hear! also I want everything I have put into it back including my employer's match that I never got to see plus interest on all of it.
Hey Soros:
Is this your latest website?
Wake up that trying to destroy the family in the United States is a losing cause. You have done the exact opposite and brought familiy values and morals front and center.
Get a life and stop trying to take the lives of those in the bellies of pregnant women.
Check it out, he's convinced that "a large percentage" of parent wish they'd never had kids, but he himself has no clue, as he's childless. I would say that almost all parents I know would do it all over again if they could.
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