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What is it about "Marriage."
Free Republic | 12/4/03 | ArGee

Posted on 12/04/2003 9:53:48 AM PST by ArGee

Now that the Massachusetts Supreme Court has ruled it unconstitutional (in that state) to deny marriage to homosexual partners there is a lot of noise about how politicians are reacting. Most of the nine dwarves have declared that they oppose homosexual "marriage" but support "civil unions" that look exactly the same on paper. (President Bush has stated that he supports a maintaining our traditional understanding of marriage without giving us any specifics.)

Does anybody remember the duck test? Civil unions are marriage. This is a semantic shell game. Now, don't get me wrong. I understand Democrats and their semantic shell games. They're caught because most Americans don't support homosexual marriage. But many, if not most, Americans support some kind of civil unions.

If I understand this, Americans are against homosexual marriage, but they are in favor of homosexuals being married in everything but name. Therefore the politicians have to follow the people they want to lead, and come out against homosexual marriage.

Can any FReeper help me understand what's in that name? What is it with marriage that makes it impossible to call a relationship involving sex, shared property, joint custody of children, inheritance rights, and shared benefits marriage?


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; Philosophy
KEYWORDS: bush; candidate; dwarves; homosexual; homosexualagenda; language; marriage; prisoners; samesexmarriage
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To: ArGee
If you'll call it bloogey, then I support that 100%. The problem is that you are looking at one thing, then calling it something else that ALREADY has a meaning.

My particular point on this issue and many others is that WORDS HAVE MEANINGS and we shouldn't randomly reassign the meanings of words just because we think it's nice to do so.

I'm not arguing the pluses and minuses of gay unions. I'm saying that for hundreds of years marriage has meant the union of a man and a woman for the purpose of starting a family together, and I don't want that long-standing definition to be watered down by "new English".

Words have meanings.

21 posted on 12/04/2003 10:48:46 AM PST by jwrogers
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To: ArGee
"I really don't understand how one can support civil unions while being against marriage."

You're right - it's the same thing. It's just that the words make people feel better. Sort of like when pro-aborts use the term 'fetus' to make them feel better about baby killing.

22 posted on 12/04/2003 10:50:08 AM PST by MEGoody
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To: ArGee
I'm trying to get at the origins of marriage. This is a concept that has served civilization for thousands of years, but is now being questioned because a few people feel left out.

I'm supposing that in the early years when villages were small and distant, and marriages were arranged, or at least planned when there were only few boys and girls of proximate age available to be joined at any particular time, the purpose was to keep the tribe going. Religion was the set of civil laws (separate from the physical laws) that kept rule and order in place for fear of a higher punishment. Marriage was a way of designating that a woman was "off limits" to others if an ordered society was to exist and sustain.

Today's concept of homosexual marriage arose (again in my opinion) from workplace discrimination and harrassment laws. The argument at the time was that heterosexual couples could freely discuss their weekend activities, such as when taking children to sports events and parties, while gay workers were not similarly free to discuss their activites (perhaps they were even still "in the closet" at the time). Heterosexual couples could discuss going out with their wives/husbands, have family pictures on their desks, etc., while gay couples did not feel similarly free to express their own social arrangements. In fact, heterosexual displays of their familial arrangements were (and are still) so much the norm that they don't even feel that what they do is an overt expression of their sexuality, even though their sexuality is implied by their displays of family. Gays were simply asking for the same ability to express their familial arrangements as commonly, and as taken for granted, as heterosexuals do.

The idea that what they have is "marriage" is an attempt to equivalize their relationship with heterosexuals, when history is against that concept. Perhaps the answer is to decouple religious marriage from civil unions and require that all couples appear before a judge to obtain a civil union regardless of religious marital status, in other words, no longer make legal a church marriage. People of religious faith would still have their church/synagogue weddings, but would also have to separately seek a civil union in order to obtain legal status.

-PJ

23 posted on 12/04/2003 10:50:11 AM PST by Political Junkie Too (It's not safe yet to vote Democrat.)
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To: ArGee
nothing, it is a shell game which will eventually move the "m" word into the religion only arena. The only civil anything will be "unions" under the guise of seperation of church and state.

Once the "m" word is banished then the institution of marriage, with its broad common law legal interpritations of mother and father raising children, will be banished from the legal realm.

The STATUTORY construction of civil unions will then take over with it narrow government given interpritations. Civil unions which are based on two people who want to have sex together, where children are a fashion accessory. The legally narrow defenition of civil union for all can be politically manipulated the same exact way as targetted tax cuts. A broad institution can not be socialily manipulated since it exists outside of statutory construction.
24 posted on 12/04/2003 10:50:25 AM PST by longtermmemmory (Vote!)
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To: Darkbloom
"Was it the state's fault that some people didn't WANT to marry a member of their own race?"

What in the world has that got to do with the issue at hand?

25 posted on 12/04/2003 10:51:51 AM PST by MEGoody
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To: CJ Wolf
My company instituted civil unions of any gender coupling. All that was required was a notarized affidavit stating that the relationship existed for longer than six months and that the couple was cohabitating.

-PJ

26 posted on 12/04/2003 10:52:32 AM PST by Political Junkie Too (It's not safe yet to vote Democrat.)
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To: CJ Wolf
"What kind of case do I have here, it seems discriminatory."

It is. It also discriminates against the guy who wants to call his dog his 'life partner.'

27 posted on 12/04/2003 10:53:51 AM PST by MEGoody
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To: ArGee
You can provide a legal structure for your relationship to friends, pets, and inanimate objects and call them whatever you like. Even wear white and orange blossoms in your hair. Nobody's stopping you.

But marriage is a thousands-year-old institution with ancient layers of meaning--it is folly to think that you can, on a whim, force a wholesale change in it without paying a serious price.

Think of changing the metric system, or even trying to get rid of the worthless penny. And these infants think they can presto-changeo, what's in a piece of paper, no bid deal...

28 posted on 12/04/2003 10:57:29 AM PST by Mamzelle
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To: Gorjus
Actually, they're not. Marriage is an institution created by God (religious authority). Civil unions are an institution of the state (secular authority).

Based on this, I would think Americans would be for chucking the state's involvement entirely (as someone else just suggested above your post). But I don't hear them saying that. Maybe that is what I'm missing.

I do believe the only reason that the civil institution exists is because of the religious institution. But I also believe there is a civil reason to maintain it. Therefore I would argue against civil unions and marriage for homosexuals.

I guess I would agree with you if that's what I heard the candidates and polls saying. And maybe they are but I just missed it.

Oh, and I agree with you 100% on the heterosexuals destroying marriage long before the homosexuals asked for the "right."

Shalom.

29 posted on 12/04/2003 10:58:34 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: Jaysun
My point was that people are supportive of "civil unions" and not homosexual marriage because they are misinformed.

But why didn't that misinformation cause them to embrace homosexual marriage?

Shalom.

30 posted on 12/04/2003 10:59:59 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: ArGee
Nobody played word games. Why is the homosexual situation different?

Because word games is all they've got! It's the only way that they can make their argument seem reasonable! The Liberals love to use semantics (pro-choice, free education, progressive). The idea of "civil unions" is from the left. The problem that you're having is this: You're trying to take an idea from the left and apply reason to it!

Even if someone thinks that a civil union and a marriage are two different things (I do not) they're left to admit that the Government's promotion of traditional marriage is then invalid. Isn't it?
31 posted on 12/04/2003 11:01:25 AM PST by Jaysun
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To: Scenic Sounds
But, politically, that difference can make all the difference in the world!

It sounds like you're suggesting the conclusion that I had rejected out-of-hand.

Are you saying that the American public (remember, the Dims are only following the polls) are intentionally deluding themselves in the hopes the problem will go away?

It makes more sense to me for them (the public) to say "big deal, let the fags marry."

Shalom.

32 posted on 12/04/2003 11:01:39 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: Gorjus; ArGee
Marriage as a state institution exists to provide for the future of society. It is in society's best interest to encourage, even subsidize, marriage as that is the absolute best environement to raise children.

Children of course are the next generation of the society, without them the society fails (see shakers). It is the duty of any society to provide itself the best next generation (yet another reason why palestinians will never amount to much, they sacrifice their future)

Only a union of a man married to a woman is the best environment for raising children.

A 'homosexual' union cannot produce children and is a harmful environment for children. Therefore it should never be encouraged or even allowed

A union of a man and a woman who are sterile would still serve as an excellent enviornment for children if they choose to adopt. This makes them worthy of subsidy.

Argee, The only reason for someone to support 'civil unions but not 'homosexual marriage' is that they are lying to themselves. They are 'homosexual' enablers but don't want to admit it.

We've gotten so wussy about offending people and treating others nicely that we are afraid to stand up and say "I don't care who you want to sleep with, It's not a marriage unless its a man and a woman" so we try to mollify our bruised sense of political correctness by supporting 'civil unions'

33 posted on 12/04/2003 11:03:04 AM PST by John O (God Save America (Please))
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To: jwrogers
I'm saying that for hundreds of years marriage has meant the union of a man and a woman for the purpose of starting a family together, and I don't want that long-standing definition to be watered down by "new English".

Neither do I. But I think if we call it "civil union" because we want to preserve the meaning of "marriage" even though it is the same thing for different people, we will have done precisely what you want to avoid.

People will probably simply cease to use the term "marriage" and they will all become "civil unions."

Shalom.

34 posted on 12/04/2003 11:03:27 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: Political Junkie Too
homosexuals are only about sex.

Marriage is about raising children.

period.
35 posted on 12/04/2003 11:06:08 AM PST by longtermmemmory (Vote!)
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To: Political Junkie Too
Today's concept of homosexual marriage arose (again in my opinion) from workplace discrimination and harrassment laws.

You may have a point, although I think G-d ordained marriage or man would have never put up with it. But homosexuals have already won the ability to talk openly about their relationships. They have won to the point where the majority support civil unions - even the majority of Christians.

Have you heard that the debate over the Defence of Marriage ammendment is about wheter to include or exclude a clause banning civil unions? And that's among the religious.

Once again, this doesn't explain our attachment to the word "marriage." It walks, talks, and quacks like a duck. I understand the church being against homosexual marriage. But I don't understand the church being in favor of homosexual civil unions. Can they really be saying 'the Bible is against homosexual marriage, but not against state sanctioned civil unions?' I can't make it add up.

Shalom.

36 posted on 12/04/2003 11:08:07 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: ArGee
Well, I don't really know how all this is going to wind up playing out, but I do understand the reasons for which we sometimes come up with new terms that are the functional equivalent of old terms and different in name only. "Distinctions without a difference" can function to make proposed changes more palatable sometimes.
37 posted on 12/04/2003 11:08:51 AM PST by Scenic Sounds (Pero treinta miles al resto.)
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To: longtermmemmory
Once the "m" word is banished then the institution of marriage, with its broad common law legal interpritations of mother and father raising children, will be banished from the legal realm.

You do know, don't you, that the abolition of marriage is the homosexual activists' real target.

But you recognize the "m" thing and the "c u" thing are the same thing, and so do I. I am missing why the "m" word needs to be banished rather than re-defined.

Shalom.

38 posted on 12/04/2003 11:10:08 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: Mamzelle
But marriage is a thousands-year-old institution with ancient layers of meaning--it is folly to think that you can, on a whim, force a wholesale change in it without paying a serious price.

I agree. That is why I am against civil unions.

What I am trying to understand is why doing exactly what you say we should not do, but giving it another name, will avoid that price.

They have a sexual relationship. They have children. They are a family. They have common property. They have joint bank accounts. They are benificiaries on each others' life insurance properties. One gets benefits from the employer of the other. Each is a member of the others' extended family and they both visit together at holidays.

Aren't they married?

Shalom.

39 posted on 12/04/2003 11:13:12 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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To: Jaysun
You're trying to take an idea from the left and apply reason to it!

You could have me there. But I was really trying to understand polls that say most Americans, even most Christians, support civil unions but not marriage for homosexuals.

Are Americans really just plain stupid to not see they are the same thing?

I reject that notion.

Shalom.

40 posted on 12/04/2003 11:15:26 AM PST by ArGee (Scientific reasoning makes it easier to support gross immorality.)
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