~<>~<>~Junk Mail Blues~<>~<>~
We're all victims. We even may at some time have been the unwitting perpetrators. What am I talking about? Internet chain mail born of hoaxes and urban legends.
You know, the poem that tugs at your heartstrings, with an urgent message at the end to forward it to "everyone in your mailbox" so that some benevolent corporation will donate money towards a much-needed operation for a sweet little child. Or, the email that arrives ALL IN CAPITAL LETTERS SHOUTING THAT PEOPLE ARE BEING KILLED BY THE BOATLOAD BY VICIOUS, TOILET-DWELLING SPIDERS!!!!! Or the one that has a lukewarm joke or silly story that demands forwarding to "10 or more people because then you will see the most wonderful pop-up window - I swear, I've never seen anything like it!" Ever fall for that one? I did - about 7 years ago…once.
It seems that there is something about all of these sympathy or urban legend based emails that appeals to our curious nature. To be more blunt, we want to believe them. Otherwise, with Websites such as Urban Legends and Folklore and Urban Legends Reference Pages (Snopes) wouldn't have thrived as much as they have over the past few years. Each of these Websites does nothing more than to research and ultimately debunk the scores of rumor, hoax and urban legend-based emails floating around and wasting bandwidth.
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This is a recent email hoax circulating with fervor:
 "IS THIS A COINCIDENCE OR SOMETHING ELSE? Bin Laden and Saddam should have read up on The Muslim passages... The following verse is from the Quran, (the Islamic Bible) Quran ( 9:11) -- For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced; for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah; and there was peace. (Note the verse number!!!!!)"
Did it get your attention? Make you stand up and take notice? Or, more importantly, did it make you even more angrier about a horrible event that changed the life of every American? Sure. Those are the components of a junk email that will never die.  I wish I had a dollar for every time that the one above has hit my mailbox. It has never once left mine for anyone else's. Why? Whenever I receive something that has been forwarded so many times there are more "<<<<<<<<"s in it than whiskers on Santa's chin, I immediately check one, if not both of the two Websites listed above. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, the very same email that I am checking up comes up as a hoax, rumor or urban legend.
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Remember this one?
"You won't believe this photo of an 87 lb. cat in Ontario Canada!!!!!"
That's right. I *didn't* believe it. So, I looked it up and found it on the above-mentioned sites as a huge (pardon the pun) hoax. It's not hard to figure out, anyway, if you look closely. How many of you can hold 87 lbs. without the sign of the least bit of effort? More importantly, how many cats would stay that rigid while being held in that manner?
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That photo definitely belongs in the same "Hall of Shame" as this one:
I was *almost* fooled by this one. The shock and horror of September 11 was still raw. On closer inspection, what gave it away was the way the sun was hitting the airplane. The angle is not anywhere near that of how the sun is lighting the man in the foreground. Also, coupled with the fact that he is dressed for a temperature of freezing or less when it was quite warm the day of the attack, something really begins to stink in Denmark.
By the way, not all forwarded, sensationalized mail is phony. I was caught quite by surprise last week when I was the recipient of the following:
"Fwd: Good News !!!!!! SHOP AT SEARS IT IS ALL ABOUT HOW YOU TREAT THE PROTECTORS OF OUR LAND.
"I assume you have all seen the reports about how Sears is treating its reservist employees who are called up? By law, they are required to hold their jobs open and available, but nothing more. Usually, people take a big pay cut and lose benefits as a result of being called up...
"Sears is voluntarily paying the difference in salaries and maintaining all benefits, including medical insurance and bonus programs, for all called up reservist employees for up to two years. I submit that Sears is an exemplary corporate citizen and should be recognized for its contribution.
"I suggest we all shop at Sears, and be sure to find a manager to tell them why we are there so the company gets the positive reinforcement it well deserves.
"Pass it on."
I was so certain that this was another junk chain mail that I smugly went to the Urban Legends Website to debunk it and admonish its sender. Much to my surprise, I found out, by checking both sites, that this is true. I also found a list of many other companies practicing the same good deed. It warmed my heart to read that and also to pass the information on to others.
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Do yourselves and your email buddies a favor. Whenever you are the recipient of an email that makes a sensational claim, a "secret the government doesn't want you to know," something that should be forwarded to "everyone you know," something that if you forward it some deep-pockets entity will pay you for your efforts, or better yet, pay someone else, please hit the "Delete" button and send it to eternal rest in cyberspace. If you're not sure that it's a phony claim, look it up on the Snopes or Urban Legends and Folklore Websites.
We are all victims of spam. Let's not unwittingly propagate its ugly first cousin - junk chain letters.
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