Posted on 12/23/2010 7:15:45 AM PST by Colofornian
In 1844, there were approximately 26,000 members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Yet, when W.W. Phelps penned a song of tribute to his beloved, fallen Prophet, he promised that "millions shall know Brother Joseph again."
SNIP
Now known not only to the millions of members of the LDS Church, but also by countless more around the world, Joseph Smith has taken a unique and respected place in American and religious history.
SNIP
An advance copy of the CD was presented to President Thomas S. Monson...
SNIP
He reminisced about serving as a mission president in Toronto, "the only area outside his own, where Joseph Smith taught." He also noted that he's always appreciated the fact that Joseph Smith was born in the season in which we celebrate the birth of Christ. "I think very little happens by coincidence," he said. And at this season, he's happy that our thoughts can be drawn to Joseph Smith. "He gave us everything."
(Excerpt) Read more at mormontimes.com ...
From the article, citing the current Lds "prophet": He also noted that he's always appreciated the fact that Joseph Smith was born in the season in which we celebrate the birth of Christ. "I think very little happens by coincidence," he said. And at this season, he's happy that our thoughts can be drawn to Joseph Smith. "He gave us everything."
Ah. More Mormon substitutional idolatry.
Smith gave Mormons "everything?!"
*************
Time to weigh in on the nominees for Top 2010 "Merry Smithmas" FREEPER threads...from ones that show...
...Where Mormon apologists & Lds leaders are, in effect, trying to change the second verse of O Come, O Come Emmanuel by inserting Joseph Smith in place of Jesus Christ into Isaiah 11:1 as the "rod of Jesse" [click on first link below]...
...To where the previous Lds "prophet" started off his 1997 article greeting at Christmas to focusing on four graphs on Joseph Smith (due to his Dec. 23 birthday) [Click on second link below]...
...To where Joseph Smith is identified as the "Rose of Sharon" [click on third link below]
Oh. And BTW. Harry Reid is really and truly (no foolin') one of those officially sanctioned Lds home teachers!
Per this Salt Lake Trib 2009 article -- Harry Reid: A Mormon in the Middle: ”Today, Reid, with his security escort in tow, likely will be making his HOME TEACHING ROUNDS after his ward's three-hour service. Anyone who questions his Mormon credentials should see that, says Jim Vlock, his home-teaching companion.
LOTFL! Thanks for the laughs. Mormonism and its heretical twisting of the Gospel richly deserve this kind of mockery.
So I encourage all to invite a Mormon to your Christmas Eve (or Christmas Day) service to fill this vacuum!
I've read many other Lds blogs where they've openly discussed this vacuum as it pertains to Christmas and Easter (same thing happens where no special Easter weekday services...and some Lds wards recognize Easter in a special way -- others don't).
Re: "disconnect" -- don't take my word for it...even the Lds church-owned Deseret News ran this BYU Study in April of this year:
BYU study: Disconnect between Mormons and Easter
The full article on the website is nice.
The follow-up posts are mostly classless and clueless as is usual in an obsessed anti-Mormon activists thread (excluding this post).
Merry Christmas!
But I still think my list is a pretty good summary of who Joseph Smith was and is and will always be.
And the saddest part is, the list is by no means complete.
Twas The Night Before Smithmas
12/02/2009 - by elee
‘Twas the night before Smithmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was tithing, not even a mouse;
The recommends were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that the Bishop would actually care;
The Sunbeams were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Sacred Groves danced in their heads;
And mamma in her Garments, and I in my baker’s cap,
Had just settled down for a pre tithing settlement nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a large minivan, and eight tiny “volunteers”,
With a black suit-wearing driver, so resign-ed and thick,
I knew in a moment it must be The Bishopric.
More rapid than cumoms his Elders they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
“Now, Spencer! now, Tanner! now, Brigham and Monson!
On, Sterling! On Nephi! on, Talmadge and Huntsman!
To the top of the steps! And on to the door!
Now pester them! Pester them! Pester them all!”
As dry Wonderbread that before the Congregation does fly,
When they meet with an objection, scream “anti’ to the sky,
So up to the house-top the Elders they flew,
With the sleigh full of Shame, and The Bishopric too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each cheaply shod foot.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney The Bishopric came with a bound.
They were dressed all in black, from their heads to their feet,
And their clothes were all tarnished with Cheerios and defeat;
A bundle of tithing receipts he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a scheister just opening his pack.
His eyes — how they scorned me! his smile most unfriendly!
His sneer like a wolf, his words meant to shame me!
His tight little mouth was drawn up like a sphincter,
I could tell just by looking, he weren’t no drinker;
The end of a pen he clenched tight in his fist,
And his knuckles encircled it like a man with a beef;
He had a fat face and a “too much Jell-O” belly,
That shook, when he seethed like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, all full of himself,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A glare from his eyes and a twist of his pen,
Soon clued me in that I had much still to dread;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
Perused all the records; then turned with a jerk,
And raising his arm, up high, to the square,
And jerking his head, he loudly declared;
You’re apostate! You’re evil! But we’ll still take your money.
Pay it up soon, or we’ll brainwash your Honey.
That being said, he turned like a jerk,
And giving his posse the “Pay Lay Ale” yelp
Away they all waddled, like self-righteous whelps.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he lurched out of sight
Happy Smithmas to all and to all a good-night!
The have a three hour service?
I ain’t down with that. I’d leave after an hour and get some lunch.
Just to be clear, there were three hour services in my church from time to time but my ADHD kicks in around 45 minutes and I waited until first prayer and call for dedication before leaving.
Same thing all night pray-ins. I’d do it for a while and go home to bed.
Merry Christmas!
I enjoyed a few of your caucus posts this week.
Have a wonderful time with your family and friends.
Smith is a false prophet.
SNIP
Mormonism is a tool of satan.
SNIP
I know you have to excerpt but I do hate me some snips.
Oh, SNAP, I have just said the “H” word in the religion forum.
The only time I spent 3 hours in a church service was about a year ago, when we had an ordination service for new Deacons. Even at that, we had a break for lunch that some of the ladies had prepared in the basement. Even with the break, my old butt got seriously tired of sitting.
Recently we changed the format of Wed. night Bible study/prayer meeting, previously we had it in the main auditorium, we moved it to the basement and now have cake, cookies, coffee and hot chocolate and sit at tables arranged in a square.
Don't go for cookies or coffee during prayer and you're ok. It's very informal and attendance is picking up. Service starts at 6:00 P.M. and we have people getting there about an hour early.
Attendance is picking up
I recall the Wed service was less formal.
Didn’t have cake or cookies and my Mom wouldn’t let us eat them anyway.
They succeeded in killing Joseph, but he had finished his work.He was a servant of God, and gave us the Book of Mormon.He said the Bible was right in the main, but, through the translators and others, many precious portions were suppressed, and several other portions were wrongly translated; and now his testimony is in force, for he has sealed it with his blood.As I have frequently told them, no man in this dispensation will enter the courts of heaven, without the approbation of the Prophet Joseph Smith, Jun.Who has made this so?Have I?Have this people?Have the world?No; but the Lord Jehovah has decreed it.If I ever pass into the heavenly courts, it will be by the consent of the Prophet Joseph.If you ever pass through the gates into the Holy City, you will do so upon his certificate that you are worthy to pass.Can you pass without his inspection?No; neither can any person in this dispensation, which is the dispensation of the fulness of times.In this generation, and in all the generations that are to come, everyone will have to undergo the scrutiny of this Prophet.They say that they killed Joseph, and they will yet come with their hats under their arms and bend to him; but what good will it do them, unless they repent?They can come in a certain way and find favor, but will they?
--JOURNAL OF DISCOURSES, vol. 8, p. 224
The follow-up posts are mostly classless and clueless as is usual in an obsessed anti-Mormon activists thread (excluding this post).
A PARABLE
One day as he was standing admiring this house, he was approached by a very nice-looking gentleman who said to him: "I have noticed you frequently admiring this fine old house. I happen to be the agent for the owner, and I am authorized to sell it, if I can find a buyer." This was, of course, good news to the man, since the more he had looked at the house, the more he wanted it for himself and his family.
The agent took the man into the house and showed him through it, and everything the man saw made him want the house even more. The house was beautifully designed and built, with skill and imagination, in a style which was no longer very popular among most people, but which he and his family had always found attractive. He could picture in his mind how happy and comfortable his family would be there. It seemed that his fondest dream was about to come true. The man bought the house.
Before the man moved his family into the house, he asked the agent about the usual inspections, for termites, dry rot and other possible structural problems. The agent told him that everything had been inspected thoroughly by his staff. "You can take my word for it: this house is sound and solid. It is the finest house in the city!" The man thought for a moment that he should ask to see the inspection reports, but the agent was the kind of person that inspired trust and confidence, and the man had a strong feeling deep in his heart that the agent would not try to deceive him about something so important.
The man and his family moved into their home, and it was even more lovely and comfortable than he had imagined. They invited their friends and relatives to visit them, and they were able to entertain them graciously and hear their guests' praises of their beautiful home.
One evening his brother was visiting. The brother was a meddlesome and sometimes unpleasant person, but the man tried to be gracious to him because he was his brother.
"This is a very lovely old house you have," said the brother.
"Thank you for the compliment," replied the man.
"How is the foundation? Sometimes these old houses have structural problems."
"Don't worry about that," responded the man. "Everything has been inspected and is in good order."
"Who inspected it?"
The man began to get irritated with his brother. "It's really none of your business, but I'll be happy to tell you. The seller's agent had it inspected."
"Did you examine the report yourself?"
This was really going too far, the man felt. But he answered anyway, "I didn't have to. The agent read the reports and told me that they were in order."
"How can you trust the agent that much?" the brother asked, shaking his head.
"I pity you if you have to go through life without trust, without belief, without relying on the goodness of others! Sometimes you just know in your heart that you can trust someone."
The brother said nothing, but got up to leave. "I'll maybe poke around a little outside and look over your foundation. I'm not an expert, but I do have some experience with these things."
"I do not give you permission to go nosing about my house or grounds. You are just looking for something that will give you an excuse to find fault with my home and to spoil my enjoyment of it!"
"I assure you that I am only motivated by my concern for you as my brother. I will not cause any damage." And with that, he left the house.
As he looked around the grounds and examined the house, he had to admit that it was beautiful. But he also knew that paint could hide many problems. Near a corner, in the back, he found a small, almost invisible door that appeared to lead into the basement. It had been sealed shut with a half-dozen screws. He went back inside and asked the man: "Are you aware of the door into the basement which has been sealed shut?"
"Of course I am aware of it!"
"Why is it sealed shut?"
"Because there is absolutely no need for anyone to go into the basement. There is nothing there."
"Have you ever been there?"
"No, of course not! Why would I want to go down there? I'm sure that it's just dank and musty, and there's nothing there."
"I think it would pay to take a look, to check the foundation."
"Absolutely not!" shouted the man. "This is MY house! It is MY basement! I have no interest in going there, and I forbid you to do so! I told you that the foundation has already been inspected. Now please leave me in peace!"
Rather than argue with the man, the brother left. But the sealed door continue to bother him, and the basement which it concealed. A few weeks later, when the brother knew that the man and his family were going to be away for a day or two, the brother took a screwdriver and a flashlight to the man's house and carefully opened the sealed door.
He had to stoop to enter the dark basement. The man had been right: there was nothing down there, except the posts and beams and braces that held up the house. As he crept among them, lighting his way with the flashlight, he noticed that the beams and posts had thick coats of paint. Everything was covered with paint. He took his pocket knife and scraped away the paint in a few spots, and where he had removed the paint, instead of solid wood he found a lacy, delicate framework of worm holes. He scraped away paint from some of the other structural members, in all parts of the basement, and found that the wood fiber was missing in all of them, either having been eaten by worms or termites, or having crumbled with dry rot. He was horrified. Not a single beam or post or brace could be relied on. He wondered what could be holding up the great weight of the house. It seemed to be only the paint which was covering up the rot. He almost imagined he could feel the house settling, having removed the little bit of paint, and he urgently wanted to escape. He found his way to the door, and closed it carefully after he was again in the sunshine. But his mind was troubled.
As soon as the man and his family returned, the brother came to see him. "I have some terrible news for you," he said. He confessed that he had entered the basement, contrary to the man's order. "But I know you will forgive me when I tell you what I found." He then told the man that his entire house was in danger of falling down because of the worms, termites and rot in the structural members in the basement.
But instead of thanking his brother, the man flew into a rage. "You are telling me this only to rob me of the pleasure I have in living in this beautiful house! How can you attack me like this? How can you say such terrible things about a house that is so beautiful? You obviously are my enemy. You are jealous of me because of my house. You have made up these lies with the sole purpose of trying to destroy my happiness and to cast aspersions upon my house, the agent who sold it to me and the people who inspected it and pronounced it sound. Get out! And because you have become my enemy, I never wish to see you again!"
The brother tried to calm the man. "I assure you that I am not your enemy. I am acting only with your good at heart. Why would I want otherwise?"
The man would not be calmed. "You are trying to destroy my love for this house. Therefore you must have an evil motive."
"Please," said the brother. "Come down with me to your basement, and I will let you see with your own eyes what I have found."
"I am not interested in seeing anything that you have to show me. You are obviously such an evil person that you would stoop to any level to deceive me into believing your lies. You have probably planted phony evidence in my basement. You would twist and misinterpret anything I found so that it would appear to support your filthy lies about my house. No! I will not go into the basement with you! I don't care about your delusions, and I don't have the time to humor you."
The brother was puzzled by the man's obstinacy. He couldn't understand why he wouldn't at least look in the basement himself. Perhaps, by replacing the beams, or by taking other measures in time, the house could be saved. But if nothing was done, the house would surely collapse, sooner or later, perhaps injuring someone.
Seeing that he could not help, the brother left, sad that he had been unjustly labeled an "enemy."
In spite of the man's confidence in the soundness of his house, his brother's words did trouble him for a few days. Finally, he could no longer resist the temptation, and he took a flashlight and crept through the small door into the basement. He looked around and saw where his brother had scraped the paint away to expose the fragile, rotten timbers.
He was furious! Why had his brother done this? He went upstairs to a cabinet and got a bucket of paint and a brush, and carefully repainted all the places that his brother had scraped away. "There!" he said, as he screwed the door back into place.
He decided that he would not tell his wife and family what had happened, because it would only disturb them and spoil the love and pleasure they enjoyed, living in such a beautiful house.
--Richard Packham, 1995
The follow-up posts are mostly classless and clueless as is usual in an obsessed anti-Mormon activists thread (excluding this post).
Not to disappoint you...
He was chubby and plump, all full of himself,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
THE BOOK OF JACOB
THE BROTHER OF NEPHICHAPTER 224 Behold, David and Solomon truly had many wives and concubines, which thing was abominable before me, saith the Lord.
25 Wherefore, thus saith the Lord, I have led this people forth out of the land of Jerusalem, by the power of mine arm, that I might raise up unto me a righteous branch from the fruit of the loins of Joseph.
26 Wherefore, I the Lord God will not suffer that this people shall do like unto them of old.
27 Wherefore, my brethren, hear me, and hearken to the word of the Lord: For there shall not any man among you have save it be one wife; and concubines he shall have none;
28 For I, the Lord God, delight in the chastity of women. And whoredoms are an abomination before me; thus saith the Lord of Hosts.
29 Wherefore, this people shall keep my commandments, saith the Lord of Hosts, or cursed be the land for their sakes.
30 For if I will, saith the Lord of Hosts, raise up seed unto me, I will command my people; otherwise they shall hearken unto these things.
31 For behold, I, the Lord, have seen the sorrow, and heard the mourning of the daughters of my people in the land of Jerusalem, yea, and in all the lands of my people, because of the wickedness and abominations of their husbands.
32 And I will not suffer, saith the Lord of Hosts, that the cries of the fair daughters of this people, which I have led out of the land of Jerusalem, shall come up unto me against the men of my people, saith the Lord of Hosts.
Or even HERE:
1 Timothy 3:2-3
2. Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,
3. not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money.1 Timothy 3:12
A deacon must be the husband of but one wife and must manage his children and his household well.Titus 1:6
An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.
THE
DOCTRINE AND COVENANTS
OF THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER-DAY SAINTSSECTION 13251–57, Emma Smith is counseled (commanded) to be faithful and true; 58–66, Laws governing the plurality of wives are set forth.51 Verily, I say unto you: A commandment I give unto mine handmaid, Emma Smith, your wife, whom I have given unto you, that she stay herself and partake not of that which I commanded you to offer unto her; for I did it, saith the Lord, to aprove you all, as I did Abraham, and that I might require an offering at your hand, by covenant and sacrifice.52 And let mine handmaid, Emma Smith, areceive all those that have been given unto my servant Joseph, and who are virtuous and pure before me; and those who are not pure, and have said they were pure, shall be destroyed, saith the Lord God.53 For I am the Lord thy God, and ye shall obey my voice; and I give unto my servant Joseph that he shall be made ruler over many things; for he hath been afaithful over a few things, and from henceforth I will strengthen him.55 But if she will not abide this commandment, then shall my servant Joseph do all things for her, even as he hath said; and I will bless him and multiply him and give unto him an ahundredfold in this world, of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, houses and lands, wives and children, and crowns of beternal lives in the eternal worlds.
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