Rev. Craig Groeschel, the founder of LifeChurch, which manages mysecret.tv, said the accounts of anguish and guilt that have poured into the Web site have stunned him and affirmed his belief in the need for confession.
Posted on 09/03/2006 5:43:44 AM PDT by NYer
(Sept. 1) -- On a Web site called mysecret.tv, there is the writer who was molested years ago by her baby sitter and who still cannot forgive herself for failing to protect her younger siblings from the same abuse." />
There is the happy father, businessman and churchgoer who is having a sexual relationship with another man in his church. There is the young woman who shot an abusive boyfriend when she was high on methamphetamine.
Then there is this entry: “Years ago I asked my father, ‘How does a daddy justify selling his little girl?’ He replied, ‘I needed to pay the rent, put food on the table and I liked having a few coins to jangle in my pocket.’ ”
About a month ago, LifeChurch, an evangelical network with nine locations and based in Edmond, Okla., set up mysecret.tv as a forum for people to confess anonymously on the Internet.
The LifeChurch founder, the Rev. Craig Groeschel, said that after 16 years in the ministry he knew that the smiles and eager handshakes that greeted him each week often masked a lot of pain. But the accounts of anguish and guilt that have poured into mysecret.tv have stunned him, Mr. Groeschel said, and affirmed his belief in the need for confession.
“We confess to God for forgiveness but to each other for healing,” Mr. Groeschel said. “Secrets isolate you, and keep you away from God, from those people closest to you.”
LifeChurch, which is 10 years old, tries to draw back those who may have left the faith, Mr. Groeschel said. The church hews to a conservative theology on homosexuality and abortion.
Its nine sites, in Arizona, Oklahoma, Tennessee and Texas, draw a total of 18,000 people to weekend services. LifeChurch also has a “virtual campus” online, and it relies on technology to bind together its “campuses” through endeavors like broadcast sermons.
Still, mysecret.tv represents the first time the church has had an interactive Web site tied to its sermons, in this case a series that Mr. Groeschel began last month on the need for confession.
“I can’t tell you how many hundreds of times people have told me that ‘I’m going to tell you something, Pastor, I’ve never told anyone before,’ ” Mr. Groeschel said. “I realized that people are carrying around dark secrets, and the Web site is giving them a first place for confession.”
The Internet already offers many places to confess, from the dry menu of sins at www.absolution-online.com to the raunchy exhibitionism at sites like www.confessionjunkie.com and www.grouphug.us. It is impossible to know whether these stories, like much on the Internet, are sincere or pure fiction.
One of the best-known sites is postsecret.blogspot.com, an extension of an art project in which people write their secrets on postcards and mail them to an address in Germantown, Md.
Mysecret.tv may be singular because it gives people at LifeChurch an easy opportunity to act on the sermons, said Scott L. Thumma, professor of the sociology of religion at the Hartford Institute for Religion Research.
“It’s not what you typically expect when a pastor delivers his weekly sermon, and you hit the back door and forget what he said,” Professor Thumma said. “Here it takes on a life of its own, and the folks that are here are not just those who go to LifeChurch.”
Since its inception, mysecret.tv has received more than 150,000 hits and more than 1,500 confessions, Mr. Groeschel said. Absolution is not part of the bargain, just the beginning of release.
“There’s no magic in confessing on a Web site,” Mr. Groeschel said. “My biggest fear is that someone would think that and would go on with life. This is just Step 1.”
The confessions are often just a paragraph or two. Some are eloquent, almost literary. Others are long, rushed and without punctuation, as if the writer needed to get it all out in one breath.
The starkness of the tersest confessions is jolting: “I have verbally and physically abused my wife.”
Another, referring to a spouse, said: “I tell you I love you everyday. Truth is I do love you, but I’m not in love with you, and I never have been. I just don’t want to hurt you and feel worthless.”
Many women speak of their regrets over having had abortions.
Other writers say they cannot shake the recurring nightmare of being sexually abused as children. Most were abused by relatives, neighbors and friends. Some went on to abuse younger children in their families. They state simply how their parents often did nothing to help. A few wonder where God is in all this.
“When I was 7, I was sexually abused by a guy,” a girl wrote. “Then, when I was 13, my mum did the same thing to me. Now I am 16 and scared. My doctor put me in a mental home. Sometimes, I think where is Jesus and why’s he not helping me.”
Because the site is anonymous, the staff at LifeChurch cannot reach out to those who are in danger of harming themselves or others, Mr. Groeschel said.
Professor Thumma pointed out that the resources section of the site could be improved. It now lists mostly religious books rather than mental health services.
Perhaps the most important activity the Web site has is letting people know that they are not alone in their suffering, Professor Thumma said. It harkens to the now rare practice of “testimony time” at evangelical churches, he said, when “you could hear stories about people overcoming problems, stories of hope, so that you felt you weren’t the only one struggling.”
Among those changed by the confessions is Mr. Groeschel himself.
“Knowing that so many people I see every week on the outside look so normal, and yet inside there is so much pain, that has been surprising,” he said. “When you hear about it in their own words, it’s hard to bear.”
Rev. Craig Groeschel, the founder of LifeChurch, which manages mysecret.tv, said the accounts of anguish and guilt that have poured into the Web site have stunned him and affirmed his belief in the need for confession.
For this reason, our Lord instituted the Sacrament of Reconciliation, where sins may be cleansed and forgotten.
There's a reason that Christ instituted the Sacrament of Confession/Reconciliation.
As an Episcopalian, I dutifully recited the "General Confession" every Sunday of my life . . . but I never 'got anything out of it' so to speak. When I left the confessional after my first confession in the Catholic Church, I was walking on air. The tremendous relief of having done something positive to get right with God is unbelievable.
. . . try it, you'll like it!
"When I left the confessional after my first confession in the Catholic Church, I was walking on air. The tremendous relief of having done something positive to get right with God is unbelievable."
In Orthodoxy, we regularly address, in the Liturgy, Christ as "Physician of our souls and bodies". The Church is a hospital for sick souls and the Mysterion of Confession, private, personal, one on one with the priest, is among the most powerful tools The Church has to cure us of the deadly consequences of sin.
Truth be told, its probably my favorite sacrament and it pleases me that many protestant groups are adopting it (along with fasting and various other lesser devotions).
I've heard stories of non-Catholics going to RC confession.
Years ago a friend asked me why Catholics confess sins to a priest instead of directly to God. I quoted him the scripture from John 21:21-24 “Again Jesus said, “Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you. And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.” I asked him two questions: First - Where was the only other time in the Bible that God breathed on man? The answer is when God breathed life into Adam. He agreed that this was something special. I told him we believe that Christ was creating his priesthood. The second question was about the choice the apostles had in forgiving or not forgiving anyone their sins. They would have to hear the sins to be able to make this distinction. This is when Christ instituted the sacrament of penance. Two years later I was with him when he was welcomed into the Catholic Church.
Your experience with this wonderful sacrament is not unique!
mine felt like heavy chains were taken off my heart. Thank God for the Sacrament of Reconciliation, -- forgiveness of sins, peace of mind, and it helps prevent you from sinning again. Everyone should go regularly.
Sorry - wrong verse.
Should be John 20:21-23
"When I left the confessional after my first confession in the Catholic Church, I was walking on air."
Every time I can actually feel the weight of my sins lifted from my shoulders.
"I would feel very unconfortable going online to confess my sins."
As I understand it, a sacrament requires three things: matter, intent, and form. All three have to be present.
I think -- could be wrong -- that the matter for the sacrament of absolution is the presence of a consecrated priest.
My wife and I being actively involved with the pro-life ministry at our parish, this one really touched me.
Abortion puts a tremendous burden on one's soul and does a lot of spiritual damage. Confession has helped so many of them to heal the brokenness they feel inside over the act of abortion. It's painful to see them go online seeking their spiritual needs when it's readily available at the Confessional in the Church.
On the positive side, it could be the ground work for a step in the direction of going to the Church.
Confesson-is-good-for-the-soul bump!
I've used that very same argument from Scripture with some friends . . . MAYBE it's starting to sink in!
Oh, absolutely! I joined the Catholic Church primarily for Confession -- the rest of the Church is swell, too, but I learned that later :-).
My Sunday School students are always stuned when I tell them I love going to Confession!
I collared the Rector after Mass and asked, should I make an appointment? He said, "You can just come at the usual time." I said, "You know this is going to be the Mother of All Confessions because I'm 45 years in arrears . . . " He winked and said in that inimitable Irish accent, "Ah, there won't be a problem. There aren't very many sinners in this parish."
I guarded that list with my life. I didn't want to be like the little old lady who got into the confessional and read her list: "Bread, milk, green beans . .. " and exclaimed, "Oh my God! I left my sins in the A&P!"
LOL! I usually have a list, and I count the major items on my fingers, but by the time I get to the last finger, I've always forgotten something.
Bless you and your wife for your pro life ministry. I have many friends who suffer to this day for having abortions years ago after it became legal. I so admire anyone who dedicates their lives to saving babies, and healing the live victims of the evil called abortion.
That is supposed to cover me until I remember what I forgot . . .
My husband says I was made for the Catholic Church, because I love rules. I tell him I just like to know exactly where I stand, and the Church has had 2,000 years to figure it all out!
Thank you for your kindness. It has been a real blessing to us to be involved. In helping others, we have equally been helped even further to see how valuable and precious life is.
I would like to reccommend some help for your friends that are suffering. "Forbidden Grief." It's a great book that covers a lot of areas such as emotions, spiritual impact, etc. Here's the link:
http://www.rachelsvineyard.org/>Forbidden Grief
There's also other information on there they might find helpful. Healing Retreats are offered as well.
Praying for your friends. May they one day find peace for their suffering.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.