Presb. Church USA launches ambitious plan to lose only 5% of members

Lark News ^ | Thursday, June 29, 2006

[Gamecock]

LOUISVILLE — The Presbyterian Church (USA) has launched a campaign to slow the rate of decline to 5 percent, according to the denomination.

"People at the grass roots need hope and motivation," says a spokesman. "This is a positive goal we can all get behind."

The Minus 5 Campaign aims to lower the attrition rate in spite of the denomination's continued struggle with moral issues, which has led to even greater exodus of members. Instead of losing 12 to 15 percent of members every decade, the group will now "work in great unity and joy to lose only five percent."

"This is the rallying cry we've been needing," says a pastor in Pittsburgh, Pa. "It's heartening to people at the local level to know we're determined not to shrink as rapidly."

[thoughtomator]

You can't make this stuff up.

[jwalburg]

Why not? Lark News does.

[Gamecock]

5% over the next decade? That seems to be an overly optimistic goal.

[AlaskaErik]

They are pro gun control and anti Israeli. Good riddence to this leftist anti-American trash.

[Unam Sanctam]

Maybe they could try preaching and practicing Biblical Christianity for a change, rather than left wing socialism? Just a thought...

[Unam Sanctam]

I see this is a spoof - but somehow it seems quite realistic.

[keithtoo]

Great plan. The Pyrrhic church should have more of these 'victories'. Then they will have no members.

[Dad x 3]

Funny site! Thanks.

[dufekin]

Could you explain the Biblical (or other) basis for gun control and opposing Israel? Haven't sane churches dominated by rational, thinking persons finally recognized that Jesus forgave the Jews for his crucifixion while still on the cross? Why then should we oppose the Jewish state?

[Dad x 3]

OK, I'm hooked.
Check out the T-shirts and the horoscope link. Funny stuff.

[Calvinist_Dark_Lord]

[muawiyah]

Went to Lark Press website. Somebody writing this stuff is working close to the church - working hard every day.

[Dad x 3]

with tooooo much time on their hands.
Haven't laughed this hard in a long time!

[Dad x 3]

Try this...

http://larknews.com/may_2006/secondary.php?page=1

[NonLinear]

They are pro gun control and anti Israeli. Good riddence to this leftist anti-American trash.

1. Not at my church or my presbytery. 2. Not at my church or my presbytery either. 3. Well, if you say so. I spent 4 years in the military, put myself through college, work 12+ hours per day, read FR religiously (pardon the pun), pay my taxes, vote and write my senators telling them to quit spending like drunken sailors. If that's the kind of leftist anti-American trash you would like to get rid of, then I guess we have a pretty severe disagreement.

[Gamecock]

T PC(USA) is on the verge of ordaining homosexuals, and is anti Israel.

While there are some local bodies that still preach the Gospel, the PCUSA as a whole is rapidly sliding towards apostasy. You also need to know that a portion of the money you put in the offering plate on Sunday goes to the home office and thus supports this nonsense.

When I learned that I ran from the PCUSA and joined the PCA.

[Frumanchu]

That's it...target the symptom, not the cause!

[wmfights]

"T PC(USA) is on the verge of ordaining homosexuals, and is anti Israel."
______________________________

Easy to understand why mega-churches and non-denominational churches are growing so rapidly. Also, the fastest growing segment in the Christian community is the conservative evangelical churches.

[Wallace T.]

The PCA really needs to change its name and its member churches need to drop the term "Presbyterian". The liberals have hijacked that term and as a result, conservative Christians who could potentially be members shun any affiliation. Many Baptists and independent Christians think of Presbyterian churches as Episcopalian Lite, with a fraction of the robes and candles and no bishops, but all of the liberalism and apostasy.