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Questions on Sexuality and the Bible (vanity)
12/15/04 | self

Posted on 12/15/2004 3:35:31 PM PST by walden

I only came to faith a couple of years ago, so my knowledge of the bible is still very lacking, which is why I'm asking these questions. My question is, is there any biblical indication that certain sexual practices (for example, oral sex) are forbidden between a married couple? What does the bible say about sex within marriage? It would help me a lot if folks responding could cite chapter and verse.

Thanks!


TOPICS: Apologetics; Catholic; Charismatic Christian; Evangelical Christian; Judaism; Mainline Protestant; Moral Issues; Orthodox Christian; Other Christian; Religion & Culture; Theology
KEYWORDS: bible; sex
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1 posted on 12/15/2004 3:35:31 PM PST by walden
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To: walden; Askel5

Time to post a book, Askel!


2 posted on 12/15/2004 3:39:37 PM PST by Neets (I'm not keyboard challenged, i broke a nail silly)
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To: Neets

I'm afraid to look ....


3 posted on 12/15/2004 3:40:34 PM PST by Askel5 († Cooperatio voluntaria ad suicidium est legi morali contraria. †)
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To: Askel5

It's right up your alley, toots.


4 posted on 12/15/2004 3:42:07 PM PST by Neets (I'm not keyboard challenged, i broke a nail silly)
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To: walden

Why not read the book.


5 posted on 12/15/2004 3:43:29 PM PST by SF Republican
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To: SF Republican

Well, I AM reading the book, but it's heavy sledding. I've read the NT several times over, but have been stuck in the OT for months.

If my question offends you, feel free to not answer. ;)


6 posted on 12/15/2004 3:46:02 PM PST by walden
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To: walden
My question is, is there any biblical indication that certain sexual practices (for example, oral sex) are forbidden between a married couple? What does the bible say about sex within marriage? It would help me a lot if folks responding could cite chapter and verse.

Yes. Gen 38:9-10.

He knowing that the children should not be his, when he went in to his brother's wife, he spilled his seed upon the ground, lest children should be born in his brother's name.

And therefore the Lord slew him, because he did a detestable thing:

Here is an excellent article discussing the Scriptural teaching: The Sin of Onan Revisited.

7 posted on 12/15/2004 3:46:44 PM PST by gbcdoj ("I acknowledge everyone who is united with the See of Peter" - St. Jerome)
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To: gbcdoj
He knowing that the children should not be his, when he went in to his brother's wife, he spilled his seed upon the ground, lest children should be born in his brother's name. And therefore the Lord slew him, because he did a detestable thing:

So is ok to spill seed when you aren't doing your brother's wife?

8 posted on 12/15/2004 3:53:18 PM PST by AdamSelene235
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To: walden

Did you try reading the definition of "sodomy" in the dictionary?


9 posted on 12/15/2004 4:01:18 PM PST by Campion
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To: gbcdoj
He was struck dead because he disobeyed God's commandment NOT because he was using a birth control method. Under the law if a woman's husband were to die the wife married the brother and their first child would be technically the child of the first husband - God's law. That again was why he was struck down.
10 posted on 12/15/2004 4:03:33 PM PST by roylene
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To: walden

Read Hebrews..the marriage bed is un-defilable.


11 posted on 12/15/2004 4:06:00 PM PST by roylene
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To: walden
No your questions do not offend me at all; I am just often amazed at the number of people in organized Christianity that have never read the Good Book from cover to cover. I agree some of those names and all those begats in the Torah are not easy reading.
12 posted on 12/15/2004 4:07:26 PM PST by SF Republican
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To: roylene
He was struck dead because he disobeyed God's commandment NOT because he was using a birth control method. Under the law
Deut 25:5 When brethren dwell together, and one of them dieth without children, the wife of the deceased shall not marry to another: but his brother shall take her, and raise up seed for his brother:

6 And the first son he shall have of her he shall call by his name, that his name be not abolished out of Israel.

7 But if he will not take his brother's wife, who by law belongeth to him, the woman shall go to the gate of the city, and call upon the ancients, and say: My husband's brother refuseth to raise up his brother's name in Israel: and will not take me to wife.

8 And they shall cause him to be sent for forthwith, and shall ask him. If he answer: I will not take her to wife:

9 The woman shall come to him before the ancients, and shall take off his shoe from his foot, and spit in his face, and say: So shall it be done to the man that will not build up his brother's house:

10 And his name shall be called in Israel, the house of the unshod.

Death was not the punishment for simply violating the levirate law. Also, if that was his offense, there would be no need for the Bible to explain what method he used to get around it.

13 posted on 12/15/2004 4:10:26 PM PST by gbcdoj ("I acknowledge everyone who is united with the See of Peter" - St. Jerome)
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To: walden
My question is, is there any biblical indication that certain sexual practices (for example, oral sex) are forbidden between a married couple?
No.
 
And please don't let anyone tell you different.
 
1 Corinthians, Chapter 7
 
2: Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
3:
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
4: The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5: Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
 
The Epistle to the Hebrews, Chapter 13
 
4: Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

14 posted on 12/15/2004 4:16:32 PM PST by AnnaZ (JESUS is the reason for the season... Merry CHRISTmas!)
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To: roylene
He was struck dead because he disobeyed God's commandment NOT because he was using a birth control method.

True, although later on that story, when the father-in-law has sex with that same woman, he gets her pregnant, which is a form of incest. Yet, he is not struck dead. The woman also lives, although in theory she should die as she did these things knowingly. Strange story.

15 posted on 12/15/2004 4:16:45 PM PST by BlackVeil
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To: walden

I would recommend three Christian books to get started with.

1. 'The Gift of Sex' by Penner

2. 'Intended for pleasure' by Wheat

3. 'Sacred Romance' by Tommy Nelson

As for oral sex, these books cover that area.

Song of Songs 4:16 has this to say about oral sex (there are other references as well):

"Awake, north wind, and come south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrence may spread abroad. Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits"

In other words, oral sex is not prohibited. The New Testament says that the marriage bed is undefiled. There is great freedom in the area of sexual expression within marriage. One Christian writer has summed it up this way. As long as it doesn't involve pain, pornography or other people; AND both husband and wife are agreeable, the is nothing prohibited.

You will hear some people say that Onan sinned when he "spilled his seed", but the real sin of Onan was his disobedience to a command of God. The spilling of his seed in that instance was merely the form of the disobedience. In the kJV there is even a reference to the beloved (wife) tasting the seed of the lover (husband). The Penner book states that whatever objection one might have to oral sex, it can't be supported by scripture.


16 posted on 12/15/2004 4:17:16 PM PST by connectthedots
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To: walden; AnnaZ

Also, don't be fooled by those who say Song of Songs is merely an allegory about God's relationship to his people. There is simply too much in there that cannot be 'allegorized'.

As an example, read Song of Songs 8:14 "Come away, my lover (husband), and be like a gazelle or like a young stag on the spice-laden mountains."

The NIV foot note says "Display you virile strength and agility for my delight". No way can one allegorize this passage.

The Tommy Nelson book mentioned in an earlier posts talks about the fact that the New Testament was actually written in the common language of the people, and the term associated with that greek form of language is the root word for the word vulgar. IOW, it is OK to use common slang words with your spouse when taling about sex. In other words, what the beloved (wife) in SoS 8:14 is saying to her lover (husband) is "FMN".


17 posted on 12/15/2004 4:37:43 PM PST by connectthedots
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To: SF Republican

Let's give him a break, he did say he was new to the faith. I agree that reading both the OT and NT is a worthwhile endeavor. However, even people who've read it from cover to cover dozens of times don't have it all committed to memory. I bet even Billy Graham looks things up now and again.

There's nothing wrong with telling this poster where to look to find the answer.


18 posted on 12/15/2004 4:50:06 PM PST by FauxBlonde
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To: connectthedots; walden
You will hear some people say that Onan sinned when he "spilled his seed", but the real sin of Onan was

Hogwash. Show me a quote from ANY Christian prior to 1900 that agrees with this nonsense.

Its only the sex obsessed 20th century "christians" who make such a claim, because everyone for 19 centuries prior to that, including ALL the protestant reformers, believed just the opposite of what you claim here.

As for the "Song of Songs" condoning marital sodomy, be it oral, anal, mastubatory or contraceptive, again Show me a quote from ANY Christian prior to 1900 that agrees with this nonsense.

Its only the sex obsessed 20th century "christians" who make such a claim.

As far as Christian guiidelines for marital sexuality, the bottom line is this:

Anything goes, but only IF, in the end, you could get pregnant as a result.

Oral stimulation prior to sexual intercourse is OK for foreplay. Same with just about anything else.

But according to all Christian history except the last 100 years, any type of sex that precludes contraception when its all said and done, is sodomitic in nature.

See the writings of Luther, Calvin, and the other reformers regarding the Onan incident if you need further proof.

19 posted on 12/15/2004 5:34:17 PM PST by St. Johann Tetzel (A fool [esp. a bigoted Christianophobic fool] can ask more questions than a wise man can answer.)
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To: walden
My question is, is there any biblical indication that certain A. sexual practices (for example, oral sex) are forbidden between a married couple? B. What does the bible say about sex within marriage? It would help me a lot if folks responding could cite chapter and verse.

A. No, except that the relations are to be between the husband and wife, see B.

B. "3The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. 5Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
20 posted on 12/15/2004 5:40:10 PM PST by aruanan
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