Posted on 08/08/2003 7:53:43 AM PDT by bedolido
Edited on 04/13/2004 3:31:42 AM PDT by Jim Robinson. [history]
Wait a second -- is this Silicon Valley, or Mayberry?
A survey of couples in the Valley shows that -- despite all the domestic enlightenment that supposedly has struck men between the eyes in the past decade or so -- women still do most of the chores around the house.
(Excerpt) Read more at bayarea.com ...
And she should knit me a sweater and bake me a pie and make babies.
But I can change...
If I have to...
I guess.
What is "the Natural Order of things!"
Alex I will take "Painfully Obvious Answers" for 600 next!
Miscellaneous Humor
Source: email
Published: June 13, 2000 Author: unknown
Posted on 06/13/2000 21:29:59 PDT by Entropy Squared
Hey, Guys.
Rec'd the following from a friend, and am passing it along because it's so very loaded with nuggets of wisdom (and lotsa laughs). But I address it only to the MEN at your end. Such volatile material mustn't be placed lightly in the hands of the womenfolk, and I leave it to your discretion whether your own personal inter-gender relationships can weather its release to the house population at large. It's like the force: you must wield it judiciously!
Be careful out there.
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TO WOMEN EVERYWHERE FROM A MAN WHO'S HAD ENOUGH .
If you think you're fat, you probably are . Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.
Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.
Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!
If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never going to think of it that way. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
You have enough clothes.
You have too many shoes.
Crying is blackmail.
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one: Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints don't work. Just say it!
No, we don't know what day it is. We never will.
Mark anniversaries on the calendar.
Peeing standing up is more difficult. We're bound to miss sometimes.
Most guys own three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
Check your oil.
It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
Let us ogle. We're going to look anyway; it's genetic.
You can either tell us to do something OR tell us how to do something, but not both.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
ALL men see in only 16 colors. Peach is a fruit, not a color.
If it itches, it will be scratched.
Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you're lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
What the hell is a doily?
I think it's because, when he chains her back down in the basement, the only way she gets fed is if she does a good job on the lawn.
Which is as it should be.
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