WE'VE ALL BEEN HOSED BY THE N.O.W. GANG: Why I Feel Sorry for Kobe

[Cinnamon Girl]

It's the whole "NO MEANS NO" brainwashing Gen X Y and Z have been receiving since we were in kindergarten. "NO MEANS NO" no matter what position you are in, or how you got yourself there.

Here's what I think happened: this girl went up to Kobe's bedroom in the hotel, like she said. She started having intimate contact with Kobe, they ended up in bed, and while they were in the middle of the act, the girl starts freaking out that she's only 19, Kobe isn't wearing protection, and she doesn't want to get pregnant. So she starts telling him to stop. But at that point, any man in that situation doesn't have a lot of concentration going on in his brain, and Kobe naturally wanted to complete the act, so maybe he restrained her a little.

Afterward, the girl was so upset, she ran to the police or whatever, knowing what she has been taught her whole life: "NO MEANS NO" even if you went up to a guy's room at night, even if you made out with him, even if you got in bed with him and starting doing stuff. "NO MEANS NO!!!"

At what point do we as a society come back to our senses and stop telling our girls that they can do all kinds of seductive things and be in all kinds of private, intimate situations with guys and if the guy starts making moves on her and she decides she doesn't like it all of a sudden, it's all the guy's fault and he needs to go to prison for life?

[185JHP]

Thank you for your brave and thoughtful post.

[185JHP]

Your post reminds me of a guy asking Frank Gifford "How'd you handle all the fame, adulation, etc.?" He said "Well, I was an All-American at 17..." Sadly, even Frank got embarassed.

[185JHP]

Oh, there's some wonderful women on FR - The FReeper Magnolias. You haven't lost them. There are others...

[185JHP]

Nobody has adduced this so far, so I will. Just because a DA charges somebody, doesn't mean he has a lot of real evidence. People can be framed - even rich people. Don't assume that everybody likes Kobe, or what he has. "Convincing evidence" can be manufactured. Sand can be thrown into the eyes of a jury. Even if evidence is produced at the trial, it might not be real. Dr. Sam Shepard was destroyed - and it's obvious now that he was innocent.

[Catspaw]

Whatever happened to Mark Chmura...it seems like this accusation killed his career even though he was acquitted. I never saw anyone coming to his defense like I see with Kobe Bryant...even after Chmura was acquitted...and I never saw him play football again. Must be a pigmentation issue

The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel has a section on Chewy. And I remember Packer players going to his trial, including his good friend, Frankie Winters. Chewy was rehabbing a bad back when this incident occurred and had been on IR for most, if not all of the previous season. Whether his back was good enough to pass an NFL physical is unknown. But Chewy had had back problems for a quite a while. He retired because the only team he wanted to play for was the Packers and the Packers didn't want him back.

As far as it being a "pigmentation issue," former Packer James Lofton was charged with sexual assault, tried in Green Bay and acquitted. He never played for the Packers again, but he just entered the Hall of Fame in Canton. Lofton was willing to play for other teams.

http://www.jsonline.com/news/wauk/chmura/

[Brytani]

And the fact remains, an act of adultery, should not mean a life sentence in prison.

Obviously he should have kept his pants on - however that is not the point of this case. He's not being charged/accused of adultery, he is being charged and accused of rape.

[Brytani]

We can all go back in history and recall the cases of those wrongfully convicted either in courts or in the press - convictions of the famous and not famous until their trials.

I tend to be skeptical when it comes to charges such as this especially in the case of a famous person. Way to many people in the world seeking fame/fortune anyway they can get it. I don't know if he raped her or not. I'll wait to see the evidence the prosecutor presents and the defense against it before making up my mind.

[maridee]

What you say about him not having a condom and her freaking out about it, makes alot of sense. This is where your sense stops.

Yes, NO MEANS NO! She had every right to expect him to wear a condum. In this day and age expecting someone to have sex with you without a condum is absurd. Shur she freaked out, I would have defended her if she put a knife in heart to stop him from having sex with her without a condum.

Before reading your senerio, I did not know what to beleive about this. I felt he wasn't telling the truth, but at the same time, I did not see him as a violent rapist. But then who knows.

If your senerio is correct, "NOW" did not cause his problem, he did. Yes, "NO IS NO", I am sure she was not there to be his sex slave.
Again, if you are correct, he deserves whatever he gets.

[clockwork]

Chewy was rehabbing a bad back when this incident occurred and had been on IR for most, if not all of the previous season. Whether his back was good enough to pass an NFL physical is unknown.

He played in two games in 1999 after helping lead the Packers to the Super Bowl in 1997 and 1998. The Packers released him in June of 2000 after he had attended mini-camp but was waiting for the trial to begin. I doubt the Lakers are going to release Kobe. Also, look at how the Baltimore Ravens reacted to Ray Lewis and his indictment for a double homocide in Atlanta. Total support even though he was involved in a double murder and ended up entering a plea for obstruction or perjury. No requirement that he go to "sensitivity training" like John Rocker. I still say its a pigmentation issue...

[Catspaw]

The Packers dumped Chewy and they dumped James Lofton. Both were acquitted of sexual assault charges. Neither one played for the Packers again. If you want to make this into a "pigmentation" issue, you're free to do so, but it may be your nature to bring "pigmentation" into the discussion. As far as I'm concerned, it isn't. And as far as the Packer organization goes--and not any other team in this or any other sport--one does not do things that reflect badly on the Packer organization. Period. That's why neither Mark Chmura OR James Lofton ever played another down for the Green Bay Packers, despite being acquitted of their respective sexual assault charges. Now other teams in the league and teams in other sports may do it differently, but the Packers don't do it that way. I suppose you'd have to live here in Green Bay to know the nature of the organization.

However, Chewy's physical problems started in training camp in 1999. He did play in first two games that year, but he struggled. It was hard to watch him try to play.

[riri]

Does anyone still believe Magic has AIDS? I know this comment is from way early but I don't believe he's infected at all. I think it's a big scam

Tin foil alert. I said this ten years ago. I said I thought they felt like they needed to put a face on it, show someone living with it long term etc.

[Keith in Iowa]

>>Obviously he should have kept his pants on - however that is not the point of this case.

Yes, it is. This is a totally self-inflicted situation for Kobe. His behavior landed him where he is - he has no one else to blame for this situation. He's admitted adultery - what's at issue is consent. What I don't get is why is there such a rush to judgement? Kobe's getting the same pass Clinton got in regards to Juanita.

[He Rides A White Horse]

we're talking about an allegation of rape...

...right. Key word is allegation.

What I'm saying is that falling into bed with someone you've known for thirty minutes has a plethora of potential problems. Is he/ she crazy? Is it Jack the Ripper? Is it someone after my kids. Someone who gets kicks spreading disease? You never know. You don't know this person at all.

The above statement I made wasn't made in reference to Kobe Bryant exclusively, although it could if it is as he says, a consensual act.

I wouldn't have expected you to pick up on this, as it seems cemented in your mind that (a) He is guilty, and (b) law enforcement folks are immune from the failings that plague the rest of us mere mortals.

[He Rides A White Horse]

Way to many people in the world seeking fame/fortune anyway they can get it. I don't know if he raped her or not. I'll wait to see the evidence the prosecutor presents and the defense against it before making up my mind.

Some of the townspeople already have taken up the pitchforks and torches it seems.

[A CA Guy]

http://espn.go.com/nba/news/2003/0720/1583145.html
I was wrong about glue sniffing, but was not far off I guess!!!

[TheSpottedOwl]

Yeah, someone posted this earlier today. This just confirms my belief that her parents made her go to the hospital. She probably wanted to forget about it. Wonder what her home life is like : (

[A CA Guy]

I think she was used to going to the hospital being she overdosed 8 weeks earlier in a suicide attempt.

Heck, she could probably score more drugs as well and feel the familiarity of all that attention again.

Maybe an eventual lawsuit for millions civilly was in her plans as well.
That's down the drain now.

[TheSpottedOwl]

Heck, she could probably score more drugs as well and feel the familiarity of all that attention again.

Did you even bother reading my last reply? In fact I'm listening to the news right now, and her friends are saying she isn't a liar. I still say that she probably wanted to forget about it, but her parents made her go to the hospital. Maybe an eventual lawsuit for millions civilly was in her plans as well. That's down the drain now.

I know the majority of Americans(due to their lawyers) are sue-happy, but on what basis do you assert that this girl is going for a civil suit?

[WestPacSailor]

Just one more example of letting the little head do the thinking for the big head. Happens all the time, we just don't hear about it when it happens at the Motel 6 in Mudstump, Alabama between Joe Mullet and Nora, the waitress from the Waffle House.

[cinFLA]

Bryant, 24, said Friday that he was guilty only of committing adultery.

Can't be! Just a few days ago all the pro-Kobeites were saying he was a loving family man that 'couldn't do something like that'.

Why, he always takes his meals in the hotel room alone rather than go out with the guys.

Now we know why.