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Little Robots in Your Pants
Popular Science ^ | August 2003 | Jenny Everett

Posted on 07/17/2003 3:21:52 PM PDT by Willie Green

For education and discussion only. Not for commercial use.

Dockers recently came out with a new brand of pants, the Go Khakis, which promise to keep your legs stain-free using revolutionary nanotechnology. We couldn't help thinking that Dockers might be using the word "nanotechnology" more for marketing muscle than for true scientific purposes, so we called its customer service line to ask a few pointed questions. Here's a slice of the conversation.

Dockers: How can I help you today?

Popular Science: I just bought a pair of the Go Khakis, and I noticed it says they use something called nanotechnology for stain resistance. Can you please explain how that works?

D: Umm, it's, uh, DuPont Teflon coating, and basically what we're asking you to do is not to use powdered detergent and press them after every fifth wash, and dry cleaning is an option also. And do not use fabric softener, because it can interfere with that stain-defending property.

PS: Great, but can you explain what makes this nanotechnology rather than just a coating? What is nanotechnology?

D: One moment please. Did you get the pleated or flat-front?

PS: Flat-front.

D: OK, one moment please. Because the one that says nanotechnology is the versatile pant that wicks moisture away from you.

PS: It says nanotechnology repels stains.

D: OK, one moment please. Can you give me a style number off that?

PS: Sorry, I don't have it with me. But it was a "stain defender," and I believe it said "Go Khaki."

D: And that was the flat-front one.

PS: I believe so.

D: OK, I believe it does say nanotechnology because it's the 60-cotton, 40-micropoly blend.

PS: So that's where the nanotechnology comes in?

D: Uh-huh.

PS: I still don't understand. Are there microscopic machines repelling the stain? How does it work?

D: Umm . . . I guess it's the type of fabric that makes it the nano.

PS: So the "nano" has more to do with the size of the fibers? And water is small enough to get through for washing, but other liquids are not—they bead up and roll off?

D: You know, I'm really not sure, but I do know they'll come clean. My kid has a pair of these. Messy kid. So I got the shirt and pants, and he's doing great with them. You just need to remember to press after every fifth wash.

PS: But would you say the stain defender was the Teflon coating or the size of the fibers?

D: It's a Teflon finish on the pants.

PS: So is nanotechnology affecting the stain resistance?

D: I would say not. I need to help other customers, ma'am. Can I ask how you got the number to call us today?

PS: 1-800-DOCKERS? Lucky guess.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Culture/Society; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS:
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1 posted on 07/17/2003 3:21:52 PM PDT by Willie Green
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To: Willie Green
This title is so funny!!!!!!!!!
2 posted on 07/17/2003 3:24:18 PM PDT by Dog
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To: Willie Green
Pseudo-science ALERT! I smell a "false advertising" claim about to be lodged
3 posted on 07/17/2003 3:25:07 PM PDT by LiteKeeper
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4 posted on 07/17/2003 3:26:31 PM PDT by Support Free Republic (Your support keeps Free Republic going strong!)
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To: Dog
Is that a little robot, or are you just glad to see me?
5 posted on 07/17/2003 3:28:21 PM PDT by Scott from the Left Coast
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To: Willie Green; aculeus; general_re; tet68; BlueLancer; jjbrouwer; hellinahandcart

Sooner or later someone's bound to get it right.

6 posted on 07/17/2003 3:29:08 PM PDT by dighton (NLC™)
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To: null and void
A hundred years ago they would have called the "Dockers with Radioactivity"

oh, Nanotech PING

So9

7 posted on 07/17/2003 3:29:17 PM PDT by Servant of the Nine (Mint Jelly, Little Girl?)
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To: Willie Green
The important thing here is that nanotechnology has finally ended those embarrassing moments when men have wet spots on the crotch of their pants. Finally, we can throw away our "peney pads".
8 posted on 07/17/2003 3:30:31 PM PDT by w_over_w
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To: Willie Green
She should count her blessing that she got a customer service rep that could actually read and speak English. I have not always been so lucky.
9 posted on 07/17/2003 3:32:16 PM PDT by LisaAnne
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To: LisaAnne
Como?
10 posted on 07/17/2003 3:34:03 PM PDT by w_over_w
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To: w_over_w
Finally, we can throw away our "peney pads".

What in sam hill is a peney pad??????

11 posted on 07/17/2003 3:38:48 PM PDT by avg_freeper (Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
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To: dighton
Great Trivia find! The "Man in the White Suit" is an arcane yet interesting movie!
12 posted on 07/17/2003 3:42:13 PM PDT by Young Werther
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To: avg_freeper
What in sam hill is a peney pad??????

Well, you have to be a fan of Saturday Night Live (the oldies). Each episode opened with a farcical commercial . . . there was one where a guy was embarrassed in a single's bar because he had a small urine stain in the front of his pants. Dan Akroid then steps in the pictures a "pitches" the all-new peney pads.

I thought it actually made sense.

13 posted on 07/17/2003 3:45:30 PM PDT by w_over_w
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To: avg_freeper
Finally, we can throw away our "peney pads".

One of the best fake commercials ever on Saturday Night Live. (you had to be there)

14 posted on 07/17/2003 3:47:24 PM PDT by narby (Terminate Gray Davis)
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To: avg_freeper
Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga

What in the Sam Hill is that?

15 posted on 07/17/2003 3:49:52 PM PDT by w_over_w
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To: Willie Green
Just think off all the fun we would have missed out on if Monica's dress was made from the same stuff as these Go Khakis.

In her case , would they be called <um Khakis?
16 posted on 07/17/2003 4:15:35 PM PDT by Cheapskate (Freedom,use it or lose it)
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To: Scott from the Left Coast
The girlfriend calls my robot "Gigantor."
17 posted on 07/17/2003 4:47:25 PM PDT by eno_
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To: eno_

Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!

18 posted on 07/17/2003 4:54:22 PM PDT by scan58
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To: Willie Green
She must have graduated from the Michael Moore school of journalism: put people on the spot and write down what they say word for word. All she had to do was do a google search and look here to find out about Dockers' use of nanotech (but she wasn't interested in that, she was interested in doing a hit piece).

Apparently the mechanism to defend the pants against stains is that extremely small "nano-whiskers" are used to cover the threads, and these block liquids from getting in and staining them. I assume the production of nanofibers is not easy. Anything that uses nanofibers can thus reasonably claim to be using "nanotechnology," just as anything using chemicals can claim to be using "chemistry." As in, "better living through chemistry," a slogan that applies to a lot of things. Why should "nanotechnology" refer specifically and solely to nanorobots?

19 posted on 07/17/2003 4:58:50 PM PDT by xm177e2 (Stalinists, Maoists, Ba'athists, Pacifists: Why are they always on the same side?)
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To: Cacique
Popular Science Ping!
20 posted on 07/17/2003 5:02:30 PM PDT by Clemenza (East side, West side, all around the town. Tripping the light fantastic on the sidewalks of New York)
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