Posted on 05/17/2003 4:13:57 PM PDT by optimistically_conservative
After years of observation, I have finally been able to complete my Republican lexicon:
Pro-life: We support the births of millions of unwanted children. However, if they become criminals, we reserve the right to exterminate all of them. At least they had their chance at life.
Patriotic: We love the Republican president and will give him all of the power he desires as long as he does what we want.
Un-American: Anyone who refers to the Constitution of the United States of America.
Compassionate conservatism: We support others who are not like us as long as they live their lives in the ways we tell them. If they do not, we will kick them (hard) when they are down.
Family values: Families shall have two conservative, seemingly heterosexual parents where the male is dominant and the woman recognizes his power.
Christian: Members of the Southern Baptist Convention and adherents to its principles.
I used to be a Republican until they frightened me.
Pro-choice: We believe there should be no personal responsibility or accountability in life, and reinforce this belief by supporting the murder of embryonic inconvienences, and the release of murderers of police officers.
Patriotic:Anyone who blames America first and publicly advocates for murderers, terrorists, Stalinists, etc.; but only during a Republican administration when it is fashionable.
Un-American: Any private citizen or organization exercising their individual constitutional right to attack liberal ideology in the free marketplace of ideas with critical, ad hominem or coercive arguments.
Progressive liberalism: We support judicial activism and public school indoctrination that demonizes morality, ambition and any recognition of success (especially through captialism) in order to achieve social equality through wealth redistribution, meritless racial diversification and cradle to grave government nanny-ism.
Family values: Anything antithetical to a mother and father in a monogamous relationship actively raising their children. Same sex adoptive parenting preferred; however, out-of-wedlock single parenting acceptable.
Enlightened:Athiests that support legalizing drugs and cite the works of Gramsci, Marx and Engels.
I've never been a Democrat, they've never really frightened me, but I've always felt they are a subversive influence and deserve ridicule.
What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Liar. She was never a Republican and reality frightens her. That garbage list is just the panic.
You must be Vulcan. Humor escapes your understanding.
And you Denise are a liar.
Hilarious how facts warp and twist in the mind of a liberal.
The party that holds the founding fathers in high regard, despises judges who subvert the constitution, fights tirelessly to preserve the second amendment from the fascist and communist Dems, and is on the war path to preserve the first amendment from political correctness, is now the enemy of the constitution?
Perhaps you can show me what, in the original letter as published in the AJC, is intentionally and successfully funny?
I don't which is more pathetic: The content of this "lexicon," or the fact that it took "years of observation" to produce six items. Now I know who conducts those government funded studies -Liberal Dimocrats!
Its funny that liberals see the contridiction between our Pro-life and pro-death penalty position, but fail to realize their same contridiction between anti-death penalty and pro-abortion. At least the conservatives favor the innocent over the guilty. What's the liberal excuse for their hypocripcy on these issues?
Not a prerequisite. I lauged heartily at both sections.
That would be the definition of Republican.The definiton of Democrat is quite similar, but also the essential opposite:
Democrat:Anyone who refers to the "Constitution" of the United States of America--but means by that not the written text but the text as they would like to amend it.
Democrat: Anyone who refers to the "penumbra" in the "living" Constitution of the United States of America.
I have no objection to people trying to amend the constitution. That is a perfectly constitutional procedure.
I object to those who interpret it as they want to and proceed as if their interpretation constitutes an amendment.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.