The Annual "Stella" Awards

E-Mail ^ | 12-31-2002 | Unknown

[EBUCK]

The Annual "Stella" Awards

It's time once again to consider the candidates for the Annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds.That case inspired the Stella awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.

The following are this year's candidates:

1. Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms.Robertson's son.

2. A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hub caps.

3. Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr.Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4. Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

5. A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, PA, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

6. Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. Thisoccurred while Ms.Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

7. This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motorhome. On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.

Just sitting here shaking my head ... but you have to wonder about the Judges and Jury's that hear these cases, and the concept of Contributory Negligence;~)

[EBUCK]

Don't know how much of this is true but I'mm gonna tyr and track down some of the names to verify.

EBUCK

[Nick Thimmesch]

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[bmwcyle]

8. Bill Clinton went from a poor family and a $35,000.00 government job to owning several million dollar homes. Taking million dollar book advances without a word on paper.

[EBUCK]

Well, it's a proven fake..

http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/onlyinamerica.htm

http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.htm

Some real ones from snopes though...

In March 1995, a San Diego man unsuccessfully attempted to sue the city and Jack Murphy Stadium for $5.4 million over something than can only be described as a wee problem -- Robert Glaser claimed the stadium's unisex bathroom policy at a Billy Joel and Elton John concert caused him embarrassment and emotional distress thanks to the sight of a woman using a urinal in front of him. He subsequently tried "six or seven" other bathrooms in the stadium only to find women in all of them. He asserted he "had to hold it in for four hours" because he was too embarrassed to share the public bathrooms with women.

A San Carlos, California, man is suing the Escondido Public Library for $1.5 million. His dog, a 50-pound Labrador mix, was attacked by the library's 12-pound feline mascot, L.C., (also known as Library Cat).

In 1994, a student at the University of Idaho unsuccessfully sued that institution over his fall from a third-floor dorm window. He'd been mooning other students when the window gave way. It was contended the University failed to provide a safe environment for students or to properly warn them of the dangers inherent to upper-story windows.

In 1993, McDonald's was unsuccessfully sued over a car accident in New Jersey. While driving, a man who had placed a milkshake between his legs, leaned over to reach into his bag of food and squeezed the milkshake container in the process. When the lid popped off and spilled half the drink in his lap, this driver became distracted and ran into another man's car. That man in turn tried to sue McDonald's for causing the accident, saying the restaurant should have cautioned the man who had hit him against eating while driving.

Adminmod...delete if you feel it's necessary

EBUCK

[moyden]

I think these are made up. Put "Merv Grazinski" in Google and you will find dozens of links to this same list, some in German. But no independent reference.

Besides, what are the odds that someone named "Merv Grazinski" can be found in Oklahoma?

[EBUCK]

...and got elected to the highest office in the land....TWICE!!!

EBUCK

[EBUCK]

I put him into google too, got the same result. Please see links above for verification of falsehood...

Thanks

EBUCK

[Slyfox]

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle

I have a son who broke a wrist and a son who broke a foot this summer. You mean I, too, could be a millionaire?

[Houmatt]

For starters, this thing is at least a year old.

For another, true or not, things like this happen all the time. There are many verifable stories where complete, slack-jawed neanderthals have done things too terrifyingly dumb to mention, and lawsuits are filed because common sense and personal responsibility are flat out dead and buried in this country.

And we have Stella Liebeck to thank for it.

[L.N. Smithee]

From the actual Stella Awards site (http://www.stellaawards.com/bogus.html):

---

May it please the court: Many stories are going around the 'net saying they are "The Stella Awards". Many of these stories are false, made-up, or (sometimes) true stories with false elements added to them. It makes no sense to use false examples of real problems when there are so many true examples that illustrate the actual problem.

The most-common e-mail example is the following, which the clerk has marked "Exhibit A". We've received many, many copies of it over the last few years, and no doubt you have too. You'll see what we mean by "bogus".

---

[AxelPaulsenJr]

I question the last one, sounds like an old joke we used to tell about the Iranian who bought the winnebago and thought that the cruise control was an automatic pilot.

[friendly]

The world can be cleansed of Stella Awards by:

1) Loser Pays.

2) Massive tort reform on a unprecedented level

3) Widespread empowerment of paralegals for independent practice

4) An end to punitive damages.

5) An end to bogus class action suits.

6) Outlawing contingency fees.

7) Lawyers forbidden from running from office. They are agents of the judiciary.

8) Most important: a total disempowerment of the bar associations. Lawyer discipline by true consumer control. Like any other industry.

[jjm2111]

All false.

[EBUCK]

Yup, see my #4

EBUCK

[gundog]

You mean I, too, could be a millionaire?

Or jailed for child abuse...that's the other option these days.

[Slyfox]

We walked out of a diner just downhill from Mount St. Helens WA, and I've got one on crutches and one with an arm in a cast and one with a few bandaids on his knees. Some guy kiddingly asked me what I did to them because we were quite a sight. I explained the dangers of being too big to ride a scooter, wearing wet socks while playing on monkey bars and falling off a bike while wearing a helmet.

I am thankful that guy was not a CPS agent.

[rogue yam]

Yeah, I definitely wasn't buying the one about the guy stuck in the garage. Who would sit there for eight days eating dog food, crapping in the corner, and waiting to get busted, instead of just breaking down the door?

[EBUCK]

Or a window....posted this first thing this morning, pre-coffee. I'm surprised that I even thought to semi-disclaim it with my first post...

EBUCK