If you die tomorrow, what does your family need to know today? (Lawyer Needs Freeper Help)

JD86 | 12/06/01 | JD86

[JD86]

If you die tomorrow, what does your family need to know today? (Lawyer Needs Freeper Help)

I'm an attorney who helps clients with estate planning and other money matters, but I won't claim that I "know it all". I need Freeper advice.

I once had an elderly client who always told his family "When I die, everything you need is in the manila folder". When he died, we searched high and low but we never did find that folder. As a result, it took years to settle his estate.

That shouldn't happen. I am putting together a booklet for my clients - a checklist of sorts - to help them keep track of important family information.

I'm asking for your suggestions. What would you include in such a checklist?

First - the practical. Doctor's name, where's the will, your desires regarding any minor children ... what else?

Second - the emotional. Would you tell your children you are proud of them? To stop smoking? Dump their lousy mate? What else?

Is there anything you would change about what your parents did? Have you made a checklist yet? If so, what's on it?

Also, if you are incapacitated but don't die, what then?

I have a client who has all her medications listed and taped to the inside of her kitchen cabinet and all her family knows where to find it. Do you have any other ideas like that?

Thanks to all in advance for your suggestions. Please post or send me FreeperMail.

[zip]

That said, I have a great lawyer-bashing joke about wills. But until this thread hits 100 replies, I'm not gonna tell it.

Does it count if I hit "bump" 30 times? lol

[JD86]

Read # 55 and some of the others....you have lawyers posting and giving you "free" advice.... This post is for freepers to share...and we have already had lawyers and CPAs give good advice. My thanks to them.

[JD86]

Good point. In the wills I write I designate beneficiaries at least three levels....first to, then to, and then to... I think most attorneys do the same.
Especially in case both spouses die in a common accident.

[Lucky]

I have a home safe with a notebook in there with everything the children need to know. Every document is in a separate envelope and marked, such as: will, living will, life insurance, car titles, etc.

[JD86]

I know you can still get a headstone...and a flag and an honor guard...important things.

Tonk, can you post a reference to this thread at the USO Canteen so we can get input from them? Thanks.

[IncPen]

I do have some good suggestions:

-Elderly folks should have a trusted younger person with Power of Attorney, and Power of Attorney for Healthcare.

-Heirlooms should be listed by description, value and intended recipient (and maybe a second if the intended cannot accept or refuses a bequest).

-Elderly folks with anything more than simple investments should execute a document explaining how such assets are held, valued and a strategy for disbursing them. My father died two years ago and my mother is still dealing with liquidating a complicated investment he had made

- Younger people with children should revisit their choices as to placement of surviving minor children at least yearly

-Life insurance should be reviewed annually to account for changes in family situation

-People of all ages should be encouraged to have disability and at least a million-dollar liability umbrella policy

As others have said here, personal information that might not be known to surviving heirs (family history, especially about health histories- cancer, heart, liver problems- of immediate relatives can be invaluable).

[JD86]

DD-214 ??

[JD86]

Make 200 replies and you get all the credit..:)

We are getting some really good suggestions.

[Howlin]

Not just us "oldsters" should have wills; when my son died last year, he was only 27, but he had no will; it made everything twice as hard for us regarding sale of his car, etc.

Since then I have encouraged ALL my stepchildren and my niece and my nephew to write out a will, detailing who they want their things to go to in case something should happen.

And this is ESPECIALLY important for parents of children under 18; specify WHO gets them!!!!

[RightOnline]

I'd want them to know the name of our insurance company, policy numbers, location of the policies in the house, contact name/# of the agent(s), etc. I'd want them to know the location and account number of every bank account, financial instrument (CD's, stocks, bonds, etc., etc.) and a contact name and # for each broker/banker/agent. I'd tell them who to contact IMMEDIATELY for trustworthy advice (a brother; a close friend with a good head on his/her shoulders and can offer sound financial advice). I'd give specific financial recommendations: pay off the house/don't pay off the house; status of debt load.......especially which loans / credit cards are "insured" (most forget that; many are paid in full upon the death of the loan/cardholder if the proper insurance is in force) there's plenty for college for Bobbie's last two years, but Susie may need to look at scholarships, etc. I'd let them know how I payed bills: when, to whom, how, why, etc. I'd give them the names of any "family specialists" with whom I dealt but they didn't: lawyer, mechanic, roofer, lawn service, etc.

I'd give them contacts at my workplace for questions regarding pensions, due bonuses, etc. I'd give specific recommendations regarding insurance for the rest of the family and why (and again, contact names and numbers). I'd give them some long-term financial advice. I'd leave very specific requests for my funeral arrangements.

I'd also tell them not to grieve too long, for I've gone Home to be with the Lord........and I'll await their joining me there. I would want them to know that they were the reason that I lived; the reason I pressed on; the reason I went through thick and thin, challenge, defeat, heartache...............all for them, and gladly. They made my life complete, and without them.........my life would have been empty. I would thank them for being the most wonderful gifts a man could possibly receive, and I only regret that I left too soon.

[JD86]

My sympathy to you in the loss of your mother. Thanks for sharing her list with us.....she continues to do good even now. Best regards.

[Salvation]

Lots of money goes unclaimed by beneficiaries who are unaware of its existence.

Bump....................My husband had government employee benefits in a state system and I knew nothing about how to claim the money----in a lump sum or in smaller monthly amounts during the rest of the survivor's life.

[GussiedUp]

Hi JD!

I am ashamed to say I don't have a will and neither does my spouse. I think I will be reading this area with great interest. I would think aside from what you wrote, in my case, I would not want to be kept on life support and "linger" so I would have a living will....I want my son in private school so would have that in there....I think maybe stipulate the religous upbringing I would like for my son....In our case we need to appoint guardians due to no family members aside from us....I will mull this over during the night and post more tomorrow but this is a good question and thanks for posting it!

[JD86]

Do the kids know how to open the safe?

[JD86]

Thank you. This is a great list...I knew you were only teasing before...:)

[zip]

Does someone have the combination? lol

[Salvation]

Personal documents (marriage license, military discharge, etc)

Bumping this--on both the marriage license---needed to apply for benefits and the military discharge---for proof of death and collection of any benefits there--also for request from the Veteran's Adminstration.

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

I have sent all my financial information to my mother and attorney. She has my Will, and is a signer on all my accounts in case I die.

I also have 3 envelopes that contain my photo, my blood type, a copy of my dental records and xrays, hair samples and fingernail samples. It also contains all the contact numbers that the police or medical examiner will need to reach my family and employment. I want to make it easy on people if they need to identify my body. It might sound morbid, but it's very practical.

[JD86]

That's what I asked....I know my son would just shoot it open...but the combination is a better idea...:)

[zip]

DD214 = Armed Forces Report of Transfer or Discharge. Basically proof of service and time frames.