Posted on 09/06/2001 4:07:20 PM PDT by blam
This latest scientific discovery definitely has me spooked. I'm starting to plan my Jelly Shelter for the back yard. I fully intend to survive this thing. I shall make use of the well-known physical fact that bread always falls jelly-side down.
Binkley went home and said "(BLEEP) mowing the lawn, Dad."
(But if it does work, open the door for me, OK?)
Ah, but I'll have my battery-powered anti-jelly field generator. Something I've been working on in my spare time. (You've heard of anti-matter, well ... naturally there's anti-jelly too!) Trust me; I'm gonna beat this thing.
Kirk and Spock beat god.
They can whip this Smuckers thing, easy.
I'm already negotiating with Michelle Pfeiffer. If I can't get her, maybe one of the news babes from Fox network. I'm afraid you're gonna end up being part of the cosmic ooze. Sorry.
Mangled Baby Ducks...yes, Mangled Baby Ducks!!!
No, NO! Try "Death Camp" Jam; it's the brand with the "barbed wire" on the label! MMMmmmmmmmm-GOOD!!!!!
(attribution to SNL, back during the era when it was actually funny)
First you taunt me in my sensitive gall bladder bereavement period and now this! There's a special pit in Hell waiting for you, Patrick, and it's full of JELLY!
That picture should be FORBIDDEN as a Generic Insult to ALL Women!
The HildeBeast should be JAILED for a "Century or Three" for "Indecent & Offensive Exposure!!"
WHY, Oh Lord, must we be Tortured by SUCH a "Painful Apparition!!??"
Doc
Not sure about Spock but Kirk's been a pale shadow of his former self since . . . OK, he never could act his way out of a wet paper bag.
Dream on. When the jelly hits, and all I can see outside my portholes is green slime, and me and the girls are furiously working on repopulating the universe (my sacred duty to eternity, you know) I'll think of you and the gang. But not too often.
But would I still be able to watch TeeeeeVeeeeee and surf the Web? Sounds hard with no electricity. Do they make gasoline burning computers and TeeeeeeVeeeeees? The fact that light would stop shining would make life very difficult. How could I find my computer and my TeeeeeVeeeee it there wasn't any light? And worse yet: what would I see on the TeeeeeVeeeee screen if there isn't any light.
KHHHAAAAANNNNNNNNN!!!!!
PH, not you, too? I had no idea you were a defrocked scientist working on perfecting some form of medvedian malarky in your basement in your spare time. I expect a hyperlink from the "Bearfabrique" website to your secret work will be put up shortly, followed by spamming of all FR threads with impassioned diatribes about the World-Wide Conspiracy to Suppress anti-Jelly Field Generators. Evidence of this conspiracy will know doubt be derived from "channeling" the thoughts of a psychic parrot......
.... or was it a psychic ASCII bat?
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