Posted on 11/25/2015 12:03:12 PM PST by SoFloFreeper
Happy Thanksgiving and thanks for publishing my column. I'm a big fan of this holiday because few things are more American than boozing up and chowing down 'til your ankles swell and your corduroys pop. In between, you get to watch some football and share your thoughts on the trainwreck presidency of Barack Hussein Obama (hint hint). I consider myself a knowledgable debater because I read up on the blogs and I'm typically one of the most "liked" commenters on the articles.
The reason I'm writing this is because my brother's dumb kid likes to get chatty with me. I've never seen anyone bring so many printouts to the dinner table. His "talking points," he says. Reminds me of my last divorce, all those friggin' printouts. This kid, my nephew, will never admit to being a communist, it's always this "moderate independent" crap. But his Facebook feed is full of Bernie Sandinista, if you know what I mean, and he recently tweeted some gibberish about riding the bus in Czechoslovakia and identifying as a "human being" instead of what he is, an American. He's been a "student" at some Ivy League circlejerk for the better part of a decade.
I think he's 29, who the hell even cares? If he's the future, this country's digging its own grave and I'm glad I won't be there when it finally kicks the bucket. When I was his age, I was flying Ranger battalions into Grenada in '83. I spent Thanksgiving there, and believe me, we didn't have any damn printouts. We had a war, son.
A lot of my buddies have similar situations in their families, and they're always asking me for advice on how to put up with this left-wing propaganda. Well, I'll give you a taste.
He's gonna be all like "you're just giving ISIS what they want."
I'll come back at him with something like: "You know, you raise an interesting point there, Brayden. I'll tell you what, why don't you invite one of your ISIS pals around the house and we'll see how much he likes it when I slash his guts out with the turkey knife. You think that's what he wants? They want us to crush them?
Tell me something, how did you feel when your Little League team got mercy-ruled by those country boys in the district finals? Is that what you wanted? Were you just phoning it in for the "participant" trophy? Is that why you're too afraid to shave that pathetic beard? Because that's what ISIS wants?
Am I bothering you right now? Did I carpet bomb your safe space? Maybe, just maybe, what ISIS really wants is a world with fewer people like me, who've looked evil in the eye and given a few titty-twisters in our day, and more people like the skinny jean cycle jockeys you pal around with at Yale, with your ska music and your websites and "fantasy" sports.
Maybe what ISIS wants is your dental floss forearms that can barely hold a selfie stick, much less a BAR. Do those Vox cards have a talking point for that? Oh, really?
Because I was under the impression that in A-m-e-r-i-c-a, the proper way to usher in the holiday season is with a stiff Rusty Nail, not a "dialogue" about small pox and genocide, unless you want to share your feelings about the mass murder ISIS wants to bring down on your ass? Is that a topic we can let marinate? I bet you had to print out the lyrics to our national anthem when you went to sing it in the quad the night we elected President Hopey Change.
No, you listen. You listen, Brayden. Whenâs the last time you got a blister on those hands? Donât mention the time you tried eating the vegan hotdog at the WNBA game you made me take you to out of "fairness." You didnât even watch the game. You just tweeted about sexism on your iPad. You know, that little computer screen made by Apple, which last I checked was a corporation, Mr. Occupy. Don't deny it, I was watching you. You only looked up when Taylor Swift came over the PA system. How do you think that made Brittney Griner feel? Remind me: What's the name of the union for people who Twitter all day from an air conditioned office? Because I don't think "amateur food photographer" counts as a real job."
I plan to say this to the little pansy in a firm but slightly mocking tone as I pour another bourbon while eating processed turkey and holding a lit cigarette. Email me at rawdawg61@yahoo.com with any questions. Carpe cibum!
You must be very persuasive!
Good for you.
Of course not. They also support fully the Marxist Kenyan's socialist agenda while taking advantage of every tax deduction available.
My father was a WWII vet. At his funeral the Honor Guard presented the flag that draped his coffin to my brother who is older. He and his family do not respect the country so they didn't want the flag. He gave it to me and I was happy to get it.
These people are so politically ignorant they have debated who should be the first female president. Some say Hillary and some say Michelle Obama. Yes, they are that stupid.
“This guy had it figured out.”
The character, not the actor, who was a leftist freak.
That’s the irony. Norman Lear’s sendup turns out to be spot on with reality.
Liberals really don’t do satire very well.
Agree with premise and up the ante.
For example, going after the top 1 per cent....take it big (top 1 per cent in the world not just the U.S.). If they really believe this stuff they need to be ready to pay up because here comes the whole aggrieved world to lay claim to the wealth of all of the middle income Americans. This gets beyond an issue to a concept.
Agree. Woo hoo, a first. It’ll be just us two this year. Nice and peaceful and no walking on eggshells around anyone.
The past few years, Fang & I have taken to going out for
turkey & the trimmings buffet; either at a state park or
some other half decent buffet. MIL always warped holidays
into a war of the wills - which she was always assured of
winning - with me apologizing for “causing trouble &
crossing her”. She passed away a few years ago at 88. -
I don’t hate her or harbor any residual animosity. -
Husband has grown up a lot since she passed away. -
We wait until well after the lunchtime crowd on
Thanksgiving & have a leisurely late lunch. - Holidays
were always chaotic and hard on me; but that’s in the
past!
Good advice! I have a son-in-law who has a habit of wearing t-shirts to events that call for at least smart, casual dress. A collared shirt is appropriate and, even if it is warm, leave the shorts at home. As far as Politics, he and my daughter have mysteriously put their pictures of Obama away.
Well, maybe not such a mystery eh?
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
We are both great cooks. But this year we’re buying dinner from a supermarket already prepared and we’ll probably have to freeze most of it. I’m not sure how many it’s supposed to feed but it’s probably at least enough for 10 people.
After dark we’re going to a Santa’s Wonder Land near College Station, Texas and see the lights. And show our love for each other.
Wife and I were talking earlier today about how the internet has turned people against each other because people will say things on the internet that they won’t say to each other’s faces. The fact is we tell the truth on FB, twitter etc and it has the same effect as telling it face to face. I truly believe the internet has broken up a lot of families because it has taken the idea of showing respect and thrown it into the WWW abyss.
So, when holiday dinner time comes around lots of people now know exactly how everyone else feels about them so they stays home.
Thanks bg
And may I add, as a born and bred NY fashion pain in the b, no one wants to see men’s legs and not anyone wants to see men’s toes. No.
We can’t control others. Not even our guests. Forget that
Another thought, at least with me, I see people who I know when they are talking to me will tell me what they really think or feel and then I will see them on Facebook acting like some sort of moderate fence sitter. It's very hard for me to ever look at that person in the same light again. I am pretty much disgusted by their weakness.
You said “walking on eggshells”. My wife said it’s like walking through a minefield with someone constantly burying new mines. The next step could be an explosion.
Howdy, fellow Texan.
We’ve already sliced into the pumpkin pie, yum!
Back at ya’, Tex.
Good advice! I have a son-in-law who has a habit of wearing t-shirts to events that call for at least smart, casual dress. A collared shirt is appropriate and, even if it is warm, leave the shorts at home. As far as Politics, he and my daughter have mysteriously put their pictures of Obama away.
Well, maybe not such a mystery eh?
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
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