Posted on 04/21/2015 10:08:53 AM PDT by SeekAndFind
I am a queer woman planning to get married next year in a state where my marriage will not be legally recognized. It will probably not surprise you to learn that, sometimes, being gay is not easy. Coming out to your family is nervewracking, people yell slurs and threats when you hold hands on the street, and most lesbian movies are just terrible. With all those drawbacks, those of us who spend our lives with a partner of the same sex must really have no choice in the matter -- or so goes the prevailing wisdom of the gay rights movement. It's not our decision; it's genetic; we can't help to whom we're attracted. If it were up to us, wouldn't we turn our backs on all the abuse and discrimination and get nice and legally married without a second thought?
Well, no. Not all of us anyway. Some of us have figured out that, despite being underrepresented in Western culture at almost every level, despite facing homophobia and transphobia and gender policing and the disapproval of our families, being gay can actually be fantastic.
In direct opposition to both the mainstream gay movement and Lady Gaga, I would like to state for the record that I was not born this way. I have dated both men and women in the past, and when I've been with men, I never had to lie back and think of Megan Fox. I still notice attractive men on the street and on television. If I were terrified of the stigma associated with homosexuality, it would have been easy enough to date men exclusively and stay in the closet my whole life.
(Excerpt) Read more at theatlantic.com ...
The sodomites will say she’s not really lesbian, she’s bi-sexual.
I think that everyone should enjoy the richness and fullness of marriage to someone of the opposite sex. 99.9% of the population feel that way. A lot of people are just tired of fighting with homosexuals and those who feel sorry for them.
The homosexual life is empty and shallow. Those who would wish that kind of life on someone are cruel and uncaring.
Irrelevant. Nature or Nurture. Irrelevant.
I know there is a certain percentage who are not “born that way” but choose to be that way for what ever socio-psychological reasons. As liberal society tries to portray them as cool and special, I think more people with low self-esteem choose to become gay as a way of making themselves victims of society rather than holding themselves responsible for their own failures or misfortunes.
I’m not convinced that no gays are “born that way” or they would have become extinct by now but I’m convinced a certain percentage, maybe more than half, made the choice to be homosexual rather than nature forcing them into it.
I’ll just say she’s nuts.
For males, I believe the correlation was 0.47, which suggests that there is both a strong genetic and a strong learned component.
It is shocking how many Millenials believe that it's been scientifically established that homosexuality is completely genetic. Nothing could be further from the truth. Not much science has been done, but the science that has been done doesn't suggest a homosexual genetic destiny AT ALL.
Here’s the author’s response to that (cut and paste from the article):
“I get frustrated with the veiled condescension of straight people who believe that queers “can’t help it,” and thus should be treated with tolerance and pity. To say “I was born this way” is to apologize for the person I am and for whom I love. It’s like saying I would be different if I could. I wouldn’t.”
[SNIP]
So why would I want to be any other way?
The answer, of course, is that I wouldn’t — and, more importantly, that it shouldn’t matter. The “born this way” argument is frequently used in defense of gay rights, but whether or not I deserve the same rights as straight people has nothing to do with whether I chose to be the way I am. I deserve equal rights because I’m an equal. I’m a human being sharing my life with the person I love. The life I have now is not something I ended up with because I had no other options. Make no mistake — it’s a life I chose.
That’s my belief too, that it’s irrelevant. Until society decides that pedophilia is acceptable because after all, they’re “born that way”.
Well, I guess I know what you think of me then. I think she’s bi-sexual. There is a continuum.
However, per my friend who is a lesbian and a psychologist,bisexuality is rare. Most are gay or straight from the gate IMO. As a child I observed a friend’s brother and my cousin. Both were different from a very young age. Too young to have “chosen”.
Then, since she could choose it, it’s not on a par with the civil rights movement of blacks.
Life sucks.
Get used to it.
Get a room.
And STFU.
No. I didn’t say that everyone who will say that she must be a bi-sexual is a sodomite, I said that the sodomites will say that. There’s a difference.
And the reason they will say that (most of them) is because it will undermine their cries of civil rights oppression if they can’t claim that it’s an inborn characteristic.
I don’t know if it’s nature, nurture, or a combination. As a Bible-believing Christian, I believe that we are all born in sin. That doesn’t mean that society needs to be re-ordered to be accepting and “tolerant” of, for instance, pedophilia.
I’ll throw out the “Extinction” argument mainly to stimulate some thought on the absurdity of the argument. Just look at the incredible array of human differences and think about why nearly all of them are the result of intentional choices. Sure a composer or musician may have been born with some innate musical talent, but had they gone out and played baseball instead of practicing the piano, would their talent have been developed to the same degree? Yet very few musicians claim they were born that way, it was a conscious choice and they worked at it.
Another point - if homosexuality were an inherited trait, it would necessarily follow the laws of genetics. Yet we never see family trees or other proof of inheritance.
Nature vs nurture? The latter.
God gives us all a cross to bear of some kind. Straight people are expected to abide by His moral laws,regardless of their lust for each other, and so are homosexuals.
Go back to the 1990s and you will see this argument between lesbians and queers as routine.
The media quit covering it when they decided that the male homosexual view of it being genetic, was more useful.
Interesting post. Do you have a link to any of these studies?
Suicide is also a choice, but I would rather that the person enjoy the fullness and richness of life. I would talk to the person standing on the rail of the bridge getting ready to jump. I wouldn’t hand him a piece of cake and wish him “Bon Voyage!”. Even if the fall was fun and exciting.
Too young to have “chosen”.
I also have have friend who is a psychologist. In her experience (40+ years) she has yet to counsel a homosexual who did not have underlying “issues” - be it abuse, a dysfunctional family structure, etc.
I would be interested to know if your your cousin or brother’s friend, were “naturally” attracted to the same sex - or because of their “differentness”, were they scorned, and bereft of friends and eventually befriended by a homosexual who “recruited” them?
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