Man airlifted after fight with cat

Cleveland [TX] Advocate ^ | 5/6/11 | VANESA BRASHIER

[rogue yam]

It sounds like this guy learned some important new facts about cats.

[folkquest]

so many cats...so few recipes.

[Darksheare]

Coffee powered bobcat domestic mix with the bug eye out for some turkey breast from my sandwich.
I lost, horrifically.
After the docs removed the arm of the couch from my digestive tract, and they reattached my left arm below the elbow, the docs asked me how many men were involved in the attack.
I said it was my cat.
The first responders stated that the cat was as polite and friendly as could be.
I get out of the psych ward next year.

[folkquest]

Don't get me wrong... I like cats.

...they taste just like chicken!

[Darksheare]

I like cats as well.
If cats had thumbs, mankind would be doomed.

[Nachoman]

This only reinforces my opinion that cats would kill their owners if they were big enough.

[DeaconRed]

You have to be careful with the Pussy.

[Tea Party Reveler]

Reminds me of that Fabulous Furry Freak bros cartoon where a a black guy with a shovel said “let me spade that mutha ***** cat!

[Arrowhead1952]

Do you have the How to give your cat a bath excerpt?

Put cat in toilet and close lid. Sit on lid. Flush several times and you have a clean cat and toilet.

[Onelifetogive]

Funny story I heard about a stray cat and a convertible. Guy parked his car near his apartment with the windows down regularly. Stray alley cat would frequent the car marking its territory. Guy was unhappy. Guy also thought himself somewhat tough. So, the plan was to jump into the car when the cat was inside, cram the cat into a duffle bag and dispose of said cat.

Guy almost did not make it out of the car alive...

I think I still occasionally see that cat driving around town in that car...

[Dr. Scarpetta]

A Cleveland man was attacked by a housecat Friday afternoon and the man's injuries are so severe that he had to be taken by air ambulance to Memorial Hermann Hospital in Houston.

Yikes!

This article says the cat attacked 'Friday AFTERNOON.' My cat sleeps all day and goes on the hunt around the house at night. Stay out of his way!

[blueunicorn6]

That, is a good one!

[Lady Jag]

I could swear they're planning a takeover.

[Darksheare]

On a serious note, that cat DID have an addiction to turkey, roast beef, ham, and provolone cheese.
If any of the above were in visual range, she'd climb my leg and do a weird combination of a meow and a bobcats “Mwow”.
The missus made the mistake of wearing shorts one day while making a sandwich.
I've never seen someone immobilized from pain before, but she was frozen in place with the cat quizzically looking at me like, “What's her problem? YOU don't yell when I climb YOUR pantleg!”

[luvie]

BWAAAHAAAAHAAAA! That one nearly ended up in orbit! :D

[Darksheare]

Now THAT was an assassination attempt!
Cat has played too much Halo Reach.

[Delta Dawn]

Maybe the guy tried ripping off the cat’s crack?

[Gene Eric]

ROFL

[trisham]

LOLOLOLOL!!

[Lady Jag]

Yeah, thank goodness the camera stopped him from going into orbit.

It wasn't mere luck, however, as the MedCats were flying.