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Rockville Police Shoot Jesus (NBC headline)
NBCWashington.com ^ | Dec . 1, 2009 | Asha Beh

Posted on 12/01/2009 7:30:01 AM PST by ConservativeStatement

Rockville City Police shot and killed a 120-pound Rottweiler/Pit Bull dog early Sunday morning after it viciously attacked its owner and attempts to control the dog through other means -- even a taser gun -- failed.

Police said they were called to the 5800 block of Ridgeway Avenue in the Twinbrook area at about 6:20 p.m. That's where they found a 38-year-old man with bite wounds and cuts to his arms, and puncture wounds to his chest and thigh.

(Excerpt) Read more at msnbc.msn.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: dog; jesus; pitbull
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1 posted on 12/01/2009 7:30:06 AM PST by ConservativeStatement
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To: ConservativeStatement

Hay-zoos the dog?


2 posted on 12/01/2009 7:33:21 AM PST by Jagdgewehr (The GOP faithful want me to believe I have only two voting options......"bad" and "worse")
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To: ConservativeStatement
A burglar broke into a home and was looking around. He heard a soft voice say, "Jesus is watching you". Thinking it was just his imagination, he continued his search. Again the voice said "Jesus is watching you". Heturned his flashlight around and saw a parrot in a cage.

He asked the parrot if he was the one talking and the parrot said, "yes."

He asked the parrot what his name was and the parrot said, "Moses."

The burglar asked, "what kind of people would name a parrot Moses?"

The parrot said, "the same kind of people who would name their pit bull Jesus".

3 posted on 12/01/2009 7:40:19 AM PST by KarlInOhio (Obamalaise - the new mood for America.)
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To: ConservativeStatement

They should have back off and let the dog’s owner handle it. LOL


4 posted on 12/01/2009 7:41:34 AM PST by org.whodat
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To: ConservativeStatement

It says the tazer didn’t phase the dog. Is that electrical phase or mood phase?


5 posted on 12/01/2009 7:41:58 AM PST by decimon
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To: ConservativeStatement

A burgler broke into a house one night.
He shined his flashlight around,
looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said,

‘Jesus knows you’re here.’

He nearly jumped out of his skin,
clicked his flashlight off, and froze.

When he heard nothing more ,
after a bit, he shook his head and continued.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he
could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard

‘Jesus is watching you.’

Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically,
looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room,
his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
Did you say that?’ he hissed at the parrot.

‘Yep’, the parrot confessed, then squawked,
‘I’m just trying to warn you that he is watching you.’

The burglar relaxed. ‘Warn me, huh?
Who in the world are you?’

‘Moses,’ replied the bird.

‘Moses?’ the burglar laughed. ‘What kind of people would name a bird Moses?’

‘The kind of people that would name their Rottweiler “Jesus


6 posted on 12/01/2009 7:42:03 AM PST by ravingnutter
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To: Jagdgewehr
Hay-zoos was so troubled and misunderstood.
7 posted on 12/01/2009 7:42:21 AM PST by TexasCajun
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To: ConservativeStatement

I think that since some police are dog lovers, this bothers those individuals deeply to have to shoot a dog. There are those who say that some shoot the family dog too easily but a dog can rip a person to shreds just as easily.


8 posted on 12/01/2009 7:43:12 AM PST by dog breath
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To: KarlInOhio

Darn...you beat me to the punchline, I had to go look up the joke, LOL!


9 posted on 12/01/2009 7:43:22 AM PST by ravingnutter
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To: decimon
It says the tazer didn’t phase the dog

Unless we're talking Star Trek here, my bet is that the idiot reporter meant that it didn't faze the dog.

10 posted on 12/01/2009 7:49:28 AM PST by Izzy Dunne (Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
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To: ConservativeStatement; Chet 99

CS - does Chet know you’re posting pitbull stories?

You’re infringing on his domain, ya know.

(lolol)


11 posted on 12/01/2009 7:51:25 AM PST by Responsibility2nd (Ack, is that the site with "Responsibility2nd"? Some weirdo. ...)
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To: Jagdgewehr

My old neighborhood. It is definately now Hay-zoos the dog.


12 posted on 12/01/2009 8:05:25 AM PST by VeniVidiVici (Keep your dog. Get rid of a Liberal.)
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To: KarlInOhio

That’s a good one,, lol...


13 posted on 12/01/2009 8:06:23 AM PST by American Constitutionalist (There is no civility in the way the Communist/Marxist want to destroy the USA)
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To: ConservativeStatement

That’s OK. The dog will get back up in three days anyway.


14 posted on 12/01/2009 8:07:37 AM PST by reagan_fanatic (Socialism is hip until somebody loses a paycheck)
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To: Izzy Dunne
...my bet is that the idiot reporter meant that it didn't faze the dog.

Or the editor. I like how Reuters often names the reporter, editor and candle stick maker.

15 posted on 12/01/2009 8:10:47 AM PST by decimon
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To: ConservativeStatement

Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah
Jesus is just alright with me, Jesus is just alright

I don’t care what they may say, I don’t care what they may do
I don’t care what they may say, Jesus is just alright, oh yeah


16 posted on 12/01/2009 8:15:29 AM PST by WOBBLY BOB (ACORN:American Corruption for Obama Right Now)
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To: ConservativeStatement
A so called "journalist" comes up with a cute headline.

About the time I think the MSM can not get any dumber,,,, they out do themselves again.

17 posted on 12/01/2009 8:21:59 AM PST by TYVets (Let's Roll!!! The leadership of the GOP has no spine and no guts, but we conservatives do)
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To: WOBBLY BOB

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLtKbqEIY58


18 posted on 12/01/2009 8:22:33 AM PST by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ( Ya can't pick up a turd by the clean end!)
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To: ConservativeStatement

Did anyone else get annoyed that the “reporter” went out of her way to use the dog’s name rather than simply saying the dog, as many times as possible? It was like a friggin’ Bernie Taupin lyric combined with Kato Kaelin at the Simpson trual!


19 posted on 12/01/2009 8:25:47 AM PST by Dr. Sivana
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To: reagan_fanatic
That’s OK. The dog will get back up in three days anyway.

Hilarious post of the day.

20 posted on 12/01/2009 8:28:15 AM PST by sportutegrl (If liberals could do math, they would be conservatives.)
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