Posted on 11/10/2009 6:43:09 AM PST by IrishMike
Journalists across the nation, moved by the plight of a troubled Muslim psychiatrist whose "understandable emotional turmoil" broke out in gunfire last week at Fort Hood, Texas, will hold a major fundraising event in the coming weeks in honor of the accused shooter, Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan.
News coverage of the tragedy sparked reporters and anchors in the mainstream media to "reach out to Hasan in love and brotherhood because his righteous indignation at the illegal wars in Iraq and Afghanistan led him to express his outrage in the only avenue open to a non-journalist," according to an unnamed organizer of the upcoming charity event.
"We in the free press naturally see Hasan's actions as a First Amendment issue," the source said. "As a disadvantaged Muslim American, and captive of the U.S. military, Hasan's options for speaking truth to power were quite limited. He did what he could within his means, and now he's being punished for this expression of free speech."
The event will include a bevy of "A-List" news media figures manning the phones to receive contributions toward establishment of a graduate school that will train disenchanted members of the military to solve their problems with a computer keyboard, rather than with a semi-automatic handgun.
In a news release announcing plans for the fundraiser, the Society of Professional Journalist-Celebrities said, "As Major Hasan lies grievously wounded, cut down in the prime of his life by a police officer whose sworn duty is to protect and serve him, we journalists will do what we can to guard future Hasans from the brutality of an oppressive regime."
"We can't help but think how things would have been different if, instead of a handgun, Hasan would have had a press pass and a laptop computer," the group said. "He still could have accomplished his purposes, and he wouldn't be strapped to a gurney, fighting for his life right now. Rather, he could walk right into the White House or Pentagon press rooms and take the fight to the enemy like the rest of us do every day."
Rumor has it that Hasan had a “Allah is Love” bumper sticker on his car.
Morning laugh ping!
Hello!!!! Is anyone in this country responsible for their own actions?
The media is our enemy.
Thank you, thank you. Will smile for the rest of the day
13 of our American soldiers died because of this a$$hole and they’re going to raise money for the shooter? WTF?
Why aren’t they raising money for the family of the victims? Some of them had kids who don’t have a parent anymore. What about their mental anguish to cope with the fact their father or mother was murdered by a terrorist within the ranks? As Glenn say, I have blood spewing from my eyes! This can’t be true! I can’t really be reading this, can I?
Oh, God. To our military families: I’m so so so sorry for what you have gone through and that our MSM is standing behind one who took lives, not behind those that offered them up innocently. What is happening to our country that we can help the perpetrator and not the victims? Talk about backlash! How much more can we stomach?
I love all you guys in uniform. Thanks for your service and please know that not everyone is brainwashed. God bless every one of you.
The only thing the writer missed is the event will be held at The Night Of Dreams strip club.
Examiner Columnist Scott Ott is editor in chief of ScrappleFace.com, the world’s leading family-friendly news satire source.
Scrappleface isn’t anything as bad as the ‘semi-news, semi-satire’ junk that someone posts. About half those threads are complaints about the article.
Satire or not, “journalism” has long been dead in this country so such a hypothetical occurrence would not seem that far fetched from the truth.
You’re not familiar with scappleface, are you?
Psst...it’s satire. I can see why you would think it is real though given how our media in this country behaves....lol.
Thanks for posting. Brilliant piece of satire, albeit uncomfortably close to the reality of the journalistic jihad that is waged against this country on a daily basis.
I think of Scrappleface as The Onion, but for Christian families who don’t want all the ghey stuff.
Calm down - Scrappleface is satire. Although, it would be easy to see this happening in real life, given where the press and the left’s sympathies lie.
At the soon to be over-reported rallies, the humble journalist will be seen offering prayer beads with their checks when the fund raisers ‘pass the turbin’.
Ott’s usual satire, but I’ll bet there are more than a few Dr. Phil types who will try to spin this into a plea for compassion for the murderer. Hasan will be made out to be a victim just like the dead soldiers. Typical lib “logic.”
If you're referring to the excellent satirical posts by John Semmens aka the AZConservative, your judgment in satirical humor is sadly lacking.
This has to be a cruel joke!
Will they vote to give a metal of honor to Charles Manson, to those that flew the planes into the twin towers, and how about Hitler, Stalin, Herod and Judus?
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