Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Where do all the spoons go?
Canoe ^ | May 13, 2008 | Thane Burnett

Posted on 05/13/2008 12:49:18 PM PDT by Squawk 8888

click here to read article


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-43 next last

1 posted on 05/13/2008 12:49:18 PM PDT by Squawk 8888
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

Where did all the spoons go?
I want answers about that and why I have more Tupperware lids than bowls.


2 posted on 05/13/2008 12:51:09 PM PDT by svcw (There is no plan B.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

They all go into an alternate universe, everyone knows that. If you can’t find that left(or right)sock it is because someone in another dimension needed it! I am only half joking because we all know that socks do go missing in a washing machine that should show the socks but there it is, gone. As for spoons, well wouldn’t you need spoons in another dimension?


3 posted on 05/13/2008 12:54:02 PM PDT by calex59
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888
I read a science fiction story where a scientist got sick and tired of losing one sock in a dryer. He hooked up a bunch of monitoring equipment to his dryer, to try to find out how one of his socks could "walk off" every so often.

He ended up discovering the theory and practical application of teleporting things and people, a la Star Trek.

It could happen...

4 posted on 05/13/2008 12:54:32 PM PDT by willgolfforfood
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: svcw

That is hillarious.

Wish I had thought of it first.


5 posted on 05/13/2008 12:58:15 PM PDT by patton (cuiquam in sua arte credendum)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

“’Where have all the bloody teaspoons gone?’”
They’ve all gone gay. They now wish to be called “Sporks,” or “Runcibles.”
http://www.spork.org/


6 posted on 05/13/2008 12:58:50 PM PDT by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ("Don't touch that thing")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

7 posted on 05/13/2008 12:59:59 PM PDT by Constitution Day
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: calex59
I am only half joking because we all know that socks do go missing in a washing machine that should show the socks but there it is, gone.

No, they don't go missing. Socks mate in the washer and give birth in the dryer.

How else could you explain that oddball sock that shows up every once in a while when you just know you've never bought any like that?

8 posted on 05/13/2008 1:01:32 PM PDT by Bob
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

If the spoons are valuable, check Hillary’s silverware drawer.


9 posted on 05/13/2008 1:02:16 PM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (G-d is not a Republican. But Satan is definitely a Democrat.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

I just want to know if they broke the $3 million mark funding this study. Until then, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


10 posted on 05/13/2008 1:04:20 PM PDT by Attention Surplus Disorder ()OK. We're still working on your ones.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: svcw

They could have just put in metal detectors.


11 posted on 05/13/2008 1:04:35 PM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (G-d is not a Republican. But Satan is definitely a Democrat.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888
Where do all the spoons go?

Check my daughter's bedroom. I'm sure they're all there.

12 posted on 05/13/2008 1:18:25 PM PDT by Jemian (Obama: in your heart you know he's Wright.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

Sporkweasel stole them.


13 posted on 05/13/2008 1:22:30 PM PDT by mickey finn
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888

“Aitken and his spoon squad calculated that an estimated 18 million teaspoons go missing in the city of Melbourne each year,...”

No way that everybody in Melbourne could be as dishonest and sloppy as a bunch of pointy-headed nerds with no real work to do.


14 posted on 05/13/2008 1:27:36 PM PDT by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: calex59

Left or right sock?

Are you serious?


15 posted on 05/13/2008 1:29:45 PM PDT by Piranha
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: calex59

This is a true story: a good friend of my wife was separated from her husband and staying at her brother’s house; after about a month and a half of doing his laundry, her own and the two boys the washer died.

Her brother who had no mechanical skills or interest in fiddling with such things bought a new washer and we ended up with the broken one.

Just for the heck of it, I figured out the pump wasn’t working so I took it apart and started looking at it.

I couldn’t turn the coupling by hand so I took out the plate screws and opened it up expecting to find a broken gear.

There inside the machine was a tangled up piece of tan Nylon - my wife’s friend had washed her pantyhose and that machine ate them.

Scout’s Honor!


16 posted on 05/13/2008 1:35:04 PM PDT by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: calex59
Socks are actually the larval form of their species.

After being "lost" they migrate to a dark corner of your closet where they later emerge in their adult state as ---

flimsy wire hangers.

17 posted on 05/13/2008 1:40:32 PM PDT by Notary Sojac
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Piranha

Obviously you have no sense of humor.


18 posted on 05/13/2008 1:47:23 PM PDT by calex59
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: Bob

I have a place for odd ball socks. Only after enough time has passed(I’m not sure how I determine that), I throw out the ones I’ve given up on. Only to have the mate show up in the next week’s laundry. And that doesn’t even take into account that I have a dog with a sock fetish and it is not unusual, if we have a particularly large amt of odds, to look under the bed and find 6 or 8 socks she has ‘collected’. But that must be done when she is outside because she is sensitive to someone going into her private stash in her presence.


19 posted on 05/13/2008 1:51:01 PM PDT by grame (and the greatest of these is Love.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Squawk 8888
They got dropped into the trash along with the napkins and sugar wrappers. Dropping a strong magnet on a string into each waste can before emptying it into the dumpster should rescue the ones that don't go home with employees.

One would expect that they kept the study secret from the rest of the staff, in order to prevent the appropriation of spoons just to make the researchers scratch their heads.

They need to realize that spoons, like socks, are highly anti-anthromorphic, and really hate being used by humans. They will use any means possible to high-tail it to parts unknown the first chance they get.

20 posted on 05/13/2008 1:53:04 PM PDT by redhead (I want my two DOLLARS!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-43 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson