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Supremely Poignant: Sandra Day O'Connor Blesses Alzheimer Hubby's Affair
NY Post ^ | 11/12/07 | Hasani Gittens

Posted on 11/14/2007 10:52:46 AM PST by dead

The retired Supreme Court justice's spouse, John O'Connor, has had Alzheimer's disease for 17 years, and after moving into an assisted-living center in Phoenix, he began a romance with a fellow patient also suffering from the mind-debilitating ailment.

But the justice isn't jealous - the O'Connor family believes the love has given John, 77, a new lease on life.

"Mom was thrilled that dad was relaxed and happy and comfortable living here and wasn't complaining," their son Scott O'Connor, 50, told Phoenix's KPNX-TV.

Scott said that when his father recently arrived at the Huger Mercy Living Center, he was depressed.

"He knew this was sort of the beginning of the end," said Scott O'Connor. "It was basically suicide talk."

Then John O'Connor was moved to another part of the center, where he met a lady simply known as Kay.

They are often together and hold hands, Scott told KPNX.

"Forty-eight hours after moving into that new cottage, he was a teenager in love. He was happy."

< snip >

(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: alzheimers; assistedliving; dementia; elderly; oconnor; sandradayoconnor
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To: YankeeGirl
I’ve also heard of the heartbreak of Alzheimer’s patients who can’t remember that their spouse is deceased.

That was my mother in law. My husband finally resigned himself to "being" his late father on a regular basis.

When she did remember he was her son she berated him for not bringing his daughter to visit her. A little over a year after she passed away we had our first child, a daughter.

61 posted on 11/14/2007 1:40:33 PM PST by Gabz (Don't tell my mom I'm a lobbyist, she thinks I'm a piano player in a whorehouse)
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To: ari-freedom

Oh PULEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE.

Did you ever think the headline writer took some liberties with the wording?

Reading the entire article gives no such indication this is anything more than a possibly “romantic” anything.


62 posted on 11/14/2007 1:50:02 PM PST by Gabz (Don't tell my mom I'm a lobbyist, she thinks I'm a piano player in a whorehouse)
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To: American_Centurion
This is a real break for the O'Connors who now don't have to deal with their guilt for parking dad in a facility and turning him over to the care of others.
63 posted on 11/14/2007 1:50:41 PM PST by hinckley buzzard
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To: hinckley buzzard

You have apparently never dealt with a close family member suffering from this ailment.

After 17 years Mr. O’Connor was not exactly “parked” or “turned over” to others.


64 posted on 11/14/2007 1:53:03 PM PST by Gabz (Don't tell my mom I'm a lobbyist, she thinks I'm a piano player in a whorehouse)
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To: goodnesswins

The last time I saw my great-grandmother she thought my father (her grandson) was her son just coming home from WWII. She finally recognized who he was for about 30 seconds and then reverted. Then she looked at me and my brother — we both had longish hair at the time — and asked “Who are these nice looking girls?”


65 posted on 11/14/2007 1:58:44 PM PST by gracesdad
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To: dead

A new excuse for cheating men everywhere...”Honey, I had/have alzheimers!!!”


66 posted on 11/14/2007 2:02:03 PM PST by Captainpaintball
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To: marvlus

“I cannot remember the name of the movie, though.”

Away From Her.


67 posted on 11/14/2007 3:00:40 PM PST by Mila
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To: American_Centurion
Likely that he’s been a completely different person to her and toward her for a while now, which is why he’s in the retirement home.

That's probably so. We finally put Mama in a nursing home that cared for Alzheimer's patients about 4 years into her illness. She had refused, from the beginning, to live with any of her 8 kids, so we hired a friend of my older sister's to come and live with her, and we took turns staying with her on the weekends to give Mary a couple of days off each week. This allowed Mama to stay in her home as long as possible, but when her physical needs became more than Mary could handle alone, we put her in the home. By that point, she didn't really care where she was, she just knew it wasn't home, though even when she WAS home, it wasn't home to her, either. She was a totally different person to us, even though she did remember each of our names. She was kinda fuzzy on the grandkids and great grands, though. She died in the summer of 2004, 6 years into the Alzheimer's and we were relieved more than anything else, and thankful that God took her Home before she got any worse, mentally.

68 posted on 11/14/2007 3:49:11 PM PST by SuziQ
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To: dead

Has anyone here seen the movie “A Vow to Cherish?”

It’s based on a true story and it deals with this subject.


69 posted on 11/14/2007 3:52:28 PM PST by Grizzled Bear ("Does not play well with others.")
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To: DoughtyOne; massgopguy
I believe the toughest choice Sandra and the family of Kay had to make, was institutionalizing their family member.

It’s too bad Sandra Day-O’Connor couldn’t afford to hire a nurse to provide in-home care.

70 posted on 11/14/2007 3:54:59 PM PST by Grizzled Bear ("Does not play well with others.")
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To: massgopguy
She is not of sound mind. If there is sexual contact, it’s Rape.

No, it's not. Neither of them is of sound mind.

71 posted on 11/14/2007 3:59:28 PM PST by SuziQ
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To: Grizzled Bear
It’s too bad Sandra Day-O’Connor couldn’t afford to hire a nurse to provide in-home care.

Apparently such care was provided for 17 years prior to him being moved to the assisted living facility.

Who is anyone to judge the decisions made by another family?

72 posted on 11/14/2007 6:22:18 PM PST by Gabz (Don't tell my mom I'm a lobbyist, she thinks I'm a piano player in a whorehouse)
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To: Gabz

yes you are right. this is a major lesson on the choice of words and...what can properly be taken from those words. When someone is “having an affair” it usually means grounds for divorce. And when someone is said to be gay, it usually doesn’t mean they are happily excited.


73 posted on 11/14/2007 6:58:14 PM PST by ari-freedom (I am for traditional moral values, a strong national defense, and free markets.)
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