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She chose it all on the day she died (Euthanasia)
The Oregonian ^ | 9/30/07 | Dan Colburn

Posted on 09/30/2007 10:01:27 AM PDT by wagglebee

Lovelle Svart woke up Friday knowing it was the day she would die.

There was much to do. Her family and closest friends would be gathering at 11 a.m. in her mother's apartment in the Southwest Portland assisted-living center where they both lived.

She directed trips to the grocery store and even called AAA to jump-start the dead battery of her 2006 Scion. She double-checked delivery of food platters from Fred Meyer: turkey sandwiches, strawberries and grapes, pretzels, almonds and sparkling water. There would be pink roses on the dining table and a boombox in the corner to play music, including the polka tunes she loved.

Lovelle made one last trip to "the bridge," a wooden footbridge in a nearby park where she had found quiet sanctuary the past few weeks as painful cancerous tumors spread from her lungs through her chest and her throat.

The consummate planner, she had choreographed the day. She wanted to leave time -- five or so hours -- for storytelling, polka dancing and private goodbyes. And at 4 p.m., she intended to drink a fatal dose of medication, allowed by Oregon law, that would end her life.

A smoker since age 19, Lovelle found out five years ago that she had inoperable lung cancer. Radiation and chemotherapy slowed the cancer's spread but could not stop it.

In June, Lovelle's doctor warned her that she was likely to die within six months, making her eligible for Oregon's unique, 10-year-old Death With Dignity Act.

What some call doctor-assisted suicide and others call physician aid-in-dying or hastened death is one of the most passionately argued issues in U.S. medicine and politics. Proponents frame the question in terms of personal choice, death with dignity and freedom from pain. Opponents say assisted suicide violates the Hippocratic tradition of "First, do no harm" and undermines the doctor-patient relationship by turning physicians from healers into accomplices of death.

Far more people ask for a lethal prescription than actually use the drug. Either their symptoms overwhelm them before they make a final decision, or they find other ways to control those symptoms, including pain.

Lovelle was determined to keep control, if possible, of when and how she died.

On July 1, she filled out and signed a one-page form titled, "REQUEST FOR MEDICATION TO END MY LIFE IN A HUMANE AND DIGNIFIED MANNER." By signing, she agreed that she knew the expected result -- death -- and was aware of alternatives, such as hospice care.

By law, she also had to make two oral requests at least 15 days apart. Her doctor wrote the prescription for a lethal dose of barbiturate in late July, and she had it filled Aug. 7. She kept the orange bottle of clear liquid in a plastic grocery bag on a stack of towels in her bedroom closet -- "hidden in plain sight," as she put it.

She was still unsure whether she would take the drug, but said she took comfort in knowing it was there.

Once she knew she had less than six months to live, Lovelle also decided to try to start a more open public discussion of dying. During the past three months, mostly through a series of online video diaries for The Oregonian, she shared publicly the experience of facing death.

Lovelle, 62, has "touched a chord" by chronicling her "deeply intimate struggle with mortality," said Dr. Susan Tolle, director of the Center for Ethics in Health Care at Oregon Health & Science University.

"People are following closely," Tolle said Friday. "They want to know what happens to her.

"Lovelle has become their friend."

Friday morning, Lovelle stuck a yellow note on the door of her mother's apartment: "Please Do NOT Disturb. Unless Urgent. Thank you."

She wore a blue sweat suit over a "Cancer Fighter" T-shirt.

Lovelle delighted in Friday's blustery weather and a forecast that included possible thunder and lightning about the time she planned to die. "Oh, the woo-woo crowd will have a blast with that," she said.

After AAA jump-started her car, she left the engine running to recharge the battery, returned to her apartment and set the kitchen timer for 10 minutes to remind her.

When a friend later expressed shock that Lovelle had spent part of the last morning of her life dealing with a dead car battery, Lovelle explained:

"The car goes to my sister. I didn't want it to be dead."

In the living room, her family and friends sat and told stories and jokes, sometimes with political references. Sometimes they laughed a bit too loudly, out of nervousness at the occasion. Twice, Lovelle came out of the bedroom where she was having private meetings to say, "No politics!"

A bit later, Lovelle and George Eighmey, head of Compassion & Choices of Oregon, an advocacy group that works with most of the Oregonians who end their lives under the Death With Dignity Act, danced a brief but rousing polka.

By midafternoon, the studiously punctual Lovelle was falling behind her schedule. No one complained.

But a little before 4 p.m., she decided it was time to make her final preparations. First, she had to take the two pre-medication pills -- to calm her stomach and control vomiting. They were hard to swallow, given the tumors in her neck, but she got them down with water.

"It" would be in about an hour, she told her family. Time now to sit alone with her mom, Vi Svart, in her bedroom for the last time. The rest of the group sat in the living room, debating whether they wanted -- and whether Lovelle wanted them -- to be in the room with her at the end.

Lovelle's three siblings and her mother, despite deep misgivings about her decision to end her life, supported Lovelle in her choice.

"I feel so at peace," she said. "I've had such a good time. . . . And today has been so wonderful.

"I'm really ready to go. I'm ready."

About 4:30, Lovelle announced she wanted "a hugging line" -- one last hug for everybody. "You'll be first and last," she said, turning to her mom.

Lovelle stood in the center of the living room and embraced them one by one -- long hugs with tears and laughter.

Then one last cigarette break on her favorite sitting stone next to the parking lot. Afterward, Lovelle took the elevator up to the third-floor apartment and hung up her coat and hat.

"OK," she said to no one in particular. "I'm going to get into bed now."

In many ways, Lovelle fits the pattern of Oregonians who choose to end their lives under the Death With Dignity Act.

Like most, she had cancer. She was in her 60s. Well educated and insured. Not formally religious. White. Enrolled in hospice care.

And fiercely independent.

"I could be very gregarious -- and very private," she said. "Very much the partygoer -- and very much want to stay home and read."

She was chosen Miss Cafeteria at Crater Lake Lodge in the summer of 1963, and she has the lemon-yellow rayon dress to prove it. She left it hanging in a plastic dry-cleaning bag on her bathroom door.

She loved surfboarding and polka-dancing and both her first and last names, "because they are different, and I like things that are different."

And she liked, as she was the first to admit, being in control.

Lovelle decided it was more important to die by taking the lethal drug while she had a degree of control over her body than to wait for nature to take its course. But how to decide when?

Her symptoms -- shortness of breath, stomach distress, weakness and pain -- were intensifying. If she waited too long, she would be unable to drink and swallow the lethal drug on her cupboard shelf.

Lovelle sought a shifty window between life-worth-living and incapacity, "this tiny bit of freedom" when, for her last act, she could swallow a fatal potion in the company of family and friends. "That's when I want to go."

Last Sunday, after a painful, restless night, Lovelle decided it was almost time.

Swallowing was more painful than ever, like choking on broken glass or razor blades, she said. She had barely eaten in two weeks. She started taking morphine to dull her pain.

She told family and friends to come Friday.

Lovelle sat on the foot of the bed, while 10 others gathered around. A photograph of Lovelle as a curly-haired 5-year-old stood on one bedside table; on the other were a glass tumbler containing the liquid medication, which looked like water, along with a container of morphine and Lovelle's ever-present mug of Gatorade. On the wall above the head of the bed were five more family photographs.

With some help, Lovelle yanked off her shoes and socks and slipped partway under the covers.

Eighmey stood by her bedside. He has attended more than three dozen deaths of this kind.

"Is this what you really want?"

"Actually, I'd like to go on partying," Lovelle replied, laughing before turning serious. "But yes."

"If you do take it, you will die."

"Yes."

Ever the detail person, she reminded him that she wanted her glasses and watch removed, "after I fall asleep."

Eighmey warned her that the clear liquid would taste bitter. She needn't gulp it. She would have about a minute and a half to get it down.

Lovelle dipped her right pinky into the glass and tasted.

"Yuck," she said. "That's why I need the Gatorade."

Holding the glass, Eighmey asked her again to affirm that this was her wish.

Yes, she replied.

Someone asked, "Can we have another hugging line?"

One by one, they came to head of the bed for hugs and teary whispers.

"Sweet dreams."

"It's all right."

"I know."

"Thank you for being my big sister."

"All the church is praying for you."

Lovelle was sitting up in bed, three pillows propping her up.

She held the glass tumbler in her right hand, raised it to her lips and drank. It was 8 minutes after 5.

"Most godawful stuff I ever tasted in my life," she said, making a face before taking a sip of Gatorade and plain water.

She laid back and scrunched down under the covers, glasses still on to see her loved ones.

She reached for her mother, who leaned closer, then laid down next to Lovelle, stroking her hand.

"Are you OK, honey?"

"I'm fine, Mom."

"You're not sick?"

"No. I'm peaceful. It stopped raining, the sun's out. And I've had a wonderful day.

Her eyes closed.

"It's starting to hit me now."

For a while, no one moved or spoke, as Lovelle drifted into a coma. Then Lovelle's mom asked for a prayer. Others spoke up with prayers and memories, which prompted other stories. Lovelle's brother Larry read part of William Wordsworth's "Intimations of Immortality."

Lovelle lay motionless but for the gentle rise and fall of her chest. Her heart slowed but didn't stop.

About an hour into the vigil, Lovelle's mom lit three white candles in cut-glass candlesticks in the living room. "She's still with us," she said.

Hours passed. Given what Lovelle's body had been through -- not only lung cancer but also open-heart surgery in 2004, Eighmey was surprised how long she was lingering. But not her family.

"I hate to say this," one said with a smile, "but this is just like her."

"A little spitfire," agreed another.

"Above average -- that's Lovelle."

"One last reminder that she's the one in control."

Jane O'Dell, a volunteer for Compassion & Choices, sat at Lovelle's bedside all evening, holding her right hand, monitoring her breathing and regularly checking the pulse in her wrist and neck.

About 10:30 p.m., more than five hours after she had taken the drug, O'Dell signaled that Lovelle's breathing had become shallower and more labored. Her pulse dropped, her skin turned pallid and her fingernails bluish. It was more than a minute between breaths.

Family and friends resumed their bedside vigil, and silence again fell over the dark room. Lovelle's chest stopped moving.

Eighmey leaned over at 10:42 p.m. and put his ear to her chest to listen for a heartbeat. He stepped back, shaking his head and spoke in a quiet voice.

"She's gone."


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Government; News/Current Events; US: Oregon
KEYWORDS: 2horrible4words; assistedsuicide; bioethics; compassionandchoices; compassionindying; cultureofdeath; dancolburn; dutytodie; euthanasia; georgeeighmey; ghastly; ghoulish; hell; hellisreal; janeodell; kevorkian; lifehate; medicide; moralabsolutes; oregon; paincontrol; prolife; socializedmedicine; suicide; susantolle
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To: kcvl

Note the quotes:

That came directly from a google search of the organization referenced in the title article of the thread and tells us that this stalwart crusader sold out to a larger organization with a broader mission.


141 posted on 09/30/2007 6:29:44 PM PDT by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
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To: kcvl

When all the tickets are sold, the line to buy will go away.


142 posted on 09/30/2007 6:31:58 PM PDT by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
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To: Suzy Quzy

But she went outside to set her butt down before her last butt - before her butt was set in that great ashtray in the sky forever, does that make it any better, but?


143 posted on 09/30/2007 6:35:16 PM PDT by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
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To: wagglebee
Oregon has a huge problem with suicide.
144 posted on 09/30/2007 6:38:43 PM PDT by MarMema
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To: wagglebee
My grandfather died of lung cancer. It was long and slow and, I s'pect, painful. That's my disclaimer for this piece.

Can something be melancholy and macabre at the same time? I felt that reading this.

I think John Paul II had it about right. The when should be in the Great Puppeteers hands whenever possible.

145 posted on 09/30/2007 6:50:14 PM PDT by stevem
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To: CGTRWK
other-peoples-suffering-is-noble types

Good description.

146 posted on 09/30/2007 6:56:56 PM PDT by Psycho_Bunny
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To: Salvation
But don’t the palliative drugs contribute to their death? I’ve always wondered. (My husband’s death and Terri Schiavo’s death)

That's not the intention. I questioned this before I got into hospice....because I was also wary about the Terry Schiavo thing.

The drugs only progress as the pain does. The Dr's don't start them out on strong meds. If Tylenol helps... that's what they use. When that stops helping...they may move up to Vicodin or a combination of the two. The hard drugs are only used towards the end... when the patient is actively dying and the pain has increased considerably.

The point is... you're not there to kill them.... just make them comfortable through the process.

Our Docs... unlike the Schiavo fiasco... would never dream of pulling a feeding tube on a viable patient...or any patient we admitted with one. If they did... I'd be outta there.

147 posted on 09/30/2007 6:58:31 PM PDT by LaineyDee (Don't mess with Texas wimmen!)
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To: Neuromancer

He sounds like a wonderful person. I am sorry that he died in such an awful way. What a shame. My mother died a similar death from brain cancer. 2 1/2 years of chemo and radiation, she deteriorated slowly and lost control of almost everything but her brain. She had horrible pain, and they never could get ahead of it, even when hospice came in. I have never felt so helpless.

It is good to know there are some old hippies out there. It was a little before my time, but I remember seeing them and thinking how cool their lives must be.


148 posted on 09/30/2007 7:34:43 PM PDT by ga medic
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To: tbw2; wagglebee; cpforlife.org; jwalsh07; Mr. Silverback; Caleb1411; Alamo-Girl; rhema; Elsie; ...
"I think the better solution for this woman would have been far better pain medication. If it hurts too much to live, then we should do more so it doesn’t hurt too much." Well said.

The key is her desire to be in charge. This woman was not in danger of being tortured to death by terrorists, nor was she likely to live many more days (not weeks, days). She and other people taking this path may be saving their loved ones the cost of extensive life support care and are for sure avoiding less suffering they perceive in their future.

At the heart of the euthanasia movement is the desire to be in charge and not try to face the issue of Whose universe is this? Oh, the dead-soul pushers of this out will serve platitudes of god's mercy in allowing this, or god has no desire for us to suffer uselessly, but they have no close relationship with the God Who chose to suffer the cross for our sanctification and Who witnessed the suffering of His martyrs and welcomed them into exultation. When man/woman cannot resolve the notion of suffering and why it happens, they are not likely to embrace any of it if they can 'be in charge'.

What is telling in this lopsided recounting of her last five hours is the lack of speculation as to what was happening to her soul/spirit during that coma:
1) Could she have been in utter torment, facing the sudden realization that there really is life after life and she had just sealed a fate worse than the suffering she sought to 'be master over'?
2) Could she on the other hand have been in a state of intensive learning, where Jesus was relating to her the things she could have sought even to her last breath and left this phase of life with an entirely better headstart on the next?
3) Or could she have been merely dying, jerking away into oblivion, gone forever from time and space and reality of any kind?

Christopher Hitchens and professor Dawkins would be partial to the last. But in the last analysis, it might be that she squandered a last chance for sanctification'. Christians like myself, tearing up as we read the tragedy of this woman's illustrated unbelief hope for the second of the above, but fear the first for her. ...

Yes, unbelief, for she chose to 'be in control' at the very time when she should have been submitting to the will of her Creator and God, by anticipating meeting face to face her Savior. And why would I assert that?... Because she proved her unbelief by demanding the ultimate measure of 'be in control'.

149 posted on 09/30/2007 7:36:44 PM PDT by MHGinTN (If you can read this, you've had life support. Defend life support for others in the womb.)
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To: madprof98

I think God was pretty clear that he is God, and we are not. Is he unknowable - no way. Is he a mystery - absolutely.

It is not our job to decide who will be saved and who won’t. We are given salvation through Jesus because God is a very forgiving God. God will forgive those who are too afraid to face a long painful death, as he forgives all of our other sins. It takes all of my energy to concentrate on my own sins. I fail to see value in judging those who have already been judged by God himself.


150 posted on 09/30/2007 7:43:43 PM PDT by ga medic
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To: linn37

Fortunately they are not in charge of salvation and forgiveness. Maybe some of them have never seen how horrible and painful a death from cancer can be. Others I am sure just want to make themselves out to be better Christians than this woman or others that opt for this way of death. As Christians I do understand that we are to submit to God’s will, which might include pain and suffering in death. I also know that God is very familiar with our weakness and inability to live up to our responsibilities. He loves and forgives us anyway.


151 posted on 09/30/2007 7:55:01 PM PDT by ga medic
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To: Salvation

I have a dear friend who has been fighting cancer for 8 years. She’s now 36. She has truly fought, and fought hard. When first diagnosed she was sent to a top notch cancer treatment center and they told her they could treat it but not remove it. And that it will crop up again sometime, somewhere. And it has. Every time they zap one place, it’s in another. Pancreas, intestines, liver, lungs. They’ve done everything, mulitple surgeries, radiation, radiation seeds, ports, chemo, more chemo, experiental chemo, meds...

There is no dignity in having to have your friends or husband wipe your rear end. No dignity in adult diapers. There is no hope in being doped up to the eyeballs and still writhing in pain. Not one of us wants to see her die and yet none of us want to see her live like this. If we truly submitted to ‘God’s will’, none of us would take chemo or radiation or blood pressure meds or monitor our cholesterol or aspirin therapy. Or surgery.

She is dying, she isn’t giving anyone hope (which is a huge burden to place on a dying woman anyway, as if God decided to cause her a huge amount of pain to teach the rest of us something) and the only thing that all the treatments have done is prolong her death. In the beginning, she felt she had to do everything she could but now she just wants to rest. In peace. It’s a mean spirited person who thinks that is wrong of her.


152 posted on 09/30/2007 8:17:54 PM PDT by ktscarlett66 (Face it girls....I'm older and I have more insurance....)
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To: MHGinTN

Thank you for sharing your insights!


153 posted on 09/30/2007 10:11:11 PM PDT by Alamo-Girl
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To: Drango

I agree completely with you, and disagree with all the sanctimonious BS from most of the other posters. This lady made the decision that was right for her, and I understand completely why she made it. It isn’t the right decision for everyone, but she was entitled to control her fate, to the extent that any of us can control it.


154 posted on 09/30/2007 10:24:50 PM PDT by BuckeyeForever
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To: wagglebee
The Christians here on this board condemning this lady are digusting, and it makes me ashamed to call you fellow believers in Christ.
155 posted on 09/30/2007 10:27:27 PM PDT by Centurion2000
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To: ktscarlett66

You wrote: “If we truly submitted to ‘God’s will’, none of us would take chemo or radiation or blood pressure meds or monitor our cholesterol or aspirin therapy. Or surgery.”
_________________
My response: Well said and I agree. But one thing I’ve never understood — why do people who believe in an afterlife not look forward to dying? After all, most people believe they will live eternally in heaven, where their “existence” will be ideally pleasant. Shouldn’t true believers look forward to death?


156 posted on 09/30/2007 10:30:55 PM PDT by BuckeyeForever
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To: Tennessee Nana
Unfortunately you are the failure, looser and coward. You are all too willing to force misery, pain and anguish on others in order feel secure. You know nothing of the pain, agonizing pain that does not end. She was living a hell on earth that was coming to a climatic conclusion of more pain. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemies. I believe you have your choice to suffer just as she had her choice to not. God will welcome all.
157 posted on 09/30/2007 10:38:44 PM PDT by Free_in_Alabama
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To: Riverman94610
Reading this story was heart wrenching. i would hope it would not be the choice I would make. However, I cannot judge her decision. for I have not been in her shoes.

God Bless her.

I pray that she is now free of pain and with her God.

158 posted on 09/30/2007 10:42:55 PM PDT by trumandogz
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To: wagglebee
One line stood out to me:

Then one last cigarette break on her favorite sitting stone next to the parking lot.

No cheers, unfortunately.

159 posted on 09/30/2007 10:43:09 PM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: Joya

I have to tell you — that was absolutely hysterical.

Here’s my favorite part:
“The skeleton form of a woman with a dirty-grey mist inside was talking to Jesus. In shock, I listened to her. Decayed flesh hung by shreds from her bones, and, as it burned, it fell off into the bottom of the pit. Where her eyes had once been were now only empty sockets. She had no hair.” And then something about worms coming out of her.

A person has to be pretty stupid to believe this kind of silliness.


160 posted on 09/30/2007 10:43:21 PM PDT by BuckeyeForever
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