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What Would FReepers Do? A Question to the Forum.
RFace's Life ^ | 3.17.2007 | RFace

Posted on 03/17/2007 1:44:41 PM PDT by rface

I now know what I am going to do – But I am curious as to what other FReepers might do when faced with this situation.

What will I do?? (I know what I am going to do.)

I have a cousin whom I love, and with whom I am close. I grew up with this guy. We are both in our middle 40s. We both have gone through our teen-age years with some trouble along the way – and we both now hold good jobs. We both have done pretty well – in spite of our earlier attempts at self-destruction…..and in spite of some heavy burdens that life has thrown our way.

I was married a few months ago (my 2nd…and my last) and I invited my cousin and his “significant other” to our wedding. They flew in from Boston and my wife and I were very happy to have them here to be at our wedding.

I am very close to my cousin. I also like, and get along with, his “significant other”. My Cousin and I don’t see eye-to-eye on some things, but he did vote for Bush in 2000. And we agree on a lot of taxation and financial conservative views. He’s pretty much conservative-ish….sort of…(not that his politics has anything to do with this issue) ….except that he’s gay and he sent me a wedding invitation for me and my wife to come to the wedding in Massachusetts.

My Cousin knows where I stand on the Gay Marriage issue…. And my wife shares my view. Our views are not secretly held. We both think a Marriage is between a man and woman – but we both also think “civil unions” may be an option that Gay couples should be able to utilize.

The Question: Would you go to a family members Gay Wedding under a situation like this??


TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: gay; gaymarriage; homosexualagenda; perverts; sendmyregrets; thanksbutno; theanswerisno
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To: rface

If he is aware of your feelings on the matter, it would seem he's trying to goad you with the invitation.

Militancy is a hallmark of the gender confused.

I would NOT go and when asked why, I would be more than happy to explain in graphic detail why I refused to participate in the farce.


61 posted on 03/17/2007 2:11:03 PM PDT by Dr.Zoidberg (Mohammedanism - Bringing you only the best of the 6th century for fourteen hundred years.)
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To: rface
Go to the reception, get drunk, have a good time, and keep your back against a wall at all times. :-)

LBT
-=-=-
62 posted on 03/17/2007 2:11:20 PM PDT by LiberalBassTurds (Bear in mind that half the population has a below-average intelligence.)
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To: rface
Yes. Show your love for your cousin by attending.

He already knows how you stand on gay marriage. So, there is no reason to try to make that point by not attending. The folks who have pushed the gay marriage issue on all of us have done enough damage without driving a wedge between you and your cousin.
63 posted on 03/17/2007 2:11:24 PM PDT by NMR Guy
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To: rface
I was married a few months ago (my 2nd…and my last) and I invited my cousin and his “significant other” to our wedding. They flew in from Boston and my wife and I were very happy to have them here to be at our wedding.

Assuming that you want an honest answer, here's mine.

You screwed up big time by inviting him and his significant other to your wedding.
By doing so you sent a signal of equivalence, intentional or not; Expecting reciprocity is the consequence, and total equivalence is almost explicit.

64 posted on 03/17/2007 2:12:23 PM PDT by Publius6961 (MSM: Israelis are killed by rockets; Lebanese are killed by Israelis.)
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To: rface

I wouldn't go. I hate weddings. Never been to a gay one, but I don't even like the hetero ones.

99% of the time they conflict with something good on television.

If you want to get married, fine. Why should I get dressed up to watch?

When I got married, I rented a pastor to meet us in a park in Hawaii. The only witnesses were he and his two daughters who sat at a distance.

It was legal, beautful, and inconvenienced no one. There were no hair-pulling decisions for guests whether to attend. And I'm still married to the same woman 23 years later.

Some of my friends have spent over $50,000 on weddings for their kid. For what?

Just do it.


65 posted on 03/17/2007 2:12:24 PM PDT by Dog Gone
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To: rface

Nope.


66 posted on 03/17/2007 2:12:31 PM PDT by Fawn (http://www.hartzvictims.org/)
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To: rface
WoW, that's a pretty difficult situation. Is he likely to be hurt if you don't go? I think that is what you really need to consider. As a Christian, I am totally against homosexuality and very much against what they are doing, but he is still your family. You have to decide if it's worth hurting him over.
67 posted on 03/17/2007 2:12:36 PM PDT by NRA2BFree (Duncan Hunter for President '08 - A genuine "Reagan Republican" for America!)
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To: rface
Why do you have to believe in gay marriage to attend a gay marriage?

Let's say your cousin was straight and his wife was a native american and she wanted you to attend a rain dance. Would you stay away because you personally don't believe in rain dances?

Today is Saint Patrick's Day. Billions of people will celebrate it. The number of those people who are Irish and actually believe the snake story? About zero.
68 posted on 03/17/2007 2:13:59 PM PDT by Question Liberal Authority (Carbon Dioxide is plant food, not pollution.)
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To: rface

I would go--with a camera just for fun. You are lucky to have a cousin. Enjoy the celebration.


69 posted on 03/17/2007 2:14:07 PM PDT by shetlan (What is happening to America.....)
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To: rface

Some things happen in our lives that result in permanent damage to relationships and not even time will heal them.

If you care for this cousin as much as you stated, then his gayness apparently wasn't a problem in the past. So why let it be now? He gave you your moment by coming to your wedding. Doesn't he deserve that in return? So what if is a 'gay wedding'? Isn't his friendship worth more than that? If not, then all that previous caring apparently wasn't so caring after all.

Go. Have an Hors d'oeuvre. Smile. Tell him you hope they both have found happiness. Enjoy. And keep a friend.

Or stay home and lose one.


70 posted on 03/17/2007 2:15:43 PM PDT by TomGuy
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To: rface
Boy, I can tell I'm a whisper in the wind here . . . but I don't think it would be 'good' to skip his ceremony.

Forget the politics.

This is a ceremony for two people to profess their love to the world. If those people are important to you, then you be there.

Political correctness be damned.

71 posted on 03/17/2007 2:16:01 PM PDT by Dominic Harr (Conservative: The "ant", to a liberal's "grasshopper".)
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To: rface

We both think a Marriage is between a man and woman – but we both also think “civil unions” may be an option that Gay couples should be able to utilize.

Wouldn't you feel hypocritical supporting their "marriage celebration"? -- which is what you would be doing by attending the "wedding". That is the only reason to have an public wedding, to signify the family's support of the marriage.

We don't need to redefine the institution of marriage so that people can live together. We need to support marriage and family, its weakening has been so destructive to the vulnerable ones in our society.


72 posted on 03/17/2007 2:16:10 PM PDT by sgtyork (Prove to us that you can enforce the borders first)
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To: rface
Go.

I have to wonder how many of the posters here have had a wedding and their unmarried guests got rooms together under their discount block?

Life is too short - especially with family

73 posted on 03/17/2007 2:16:45 PM PDT by Scarchin (+)
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To: Dog Gone
If you want to get married, fine. Why should I get dressed up to watch?

Ha!

74 posted on 03/17/2007 2:17:58 PM PDT by Dominic Harr (Conservative: The "ant", to a liberal's "grasshopper".)
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To: rface

All of these family squabbles usually patch up once the couple has children.


75 posted on 03/17/2007 2:18:11 PM PDT by Question Liberal Authority (Carbon Dioxide is plant food, not pollution.)
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To: WorkingClassFilth

Well, rface's thoughts I do not know. More, he himself does not know them, for otherwise he would not be asking for the advice. So, I tried the logical approach: will he feel comfortable- if yes, then he should go and not ask. Will he feel uncomfortable? - he should not go then, and handle the thing nicely. Say, the jury duty, and regrettably just around the date. The only gray area is if his degree of discomfort is really minor. Under those conditions he can go, and no harm done.


76 posted on 03/17/2007 2:18:56 PM PDT by GSlob
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To: gate2wire

Deal with it :-)


77 posted on 03/17/2007 2:18:57 PM PDT by all the best
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To: Andy'smom
I was thinking along the same line as you. While I do not condone gay marriage, he is family.
78 posted on 03/17/2007 2:20:16 PM PDT by alice_in_bubbaland (As for me, I will remain neutral...for the time being.)
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To: rface

No.

Send a card wishing him well, not a wedding card, and tell him while you love him and care for his significant other, you hope that he will respect your deeply held beliefs.

It probably will end your relationship for a time, but if you do not stand for something, you may as well stand for nothing.


79 posted on 03/17/2007 2:20:18 PM PDT by OpusatFR ( ALEA IACTA EST. We have just crossed the Rubicon.)
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To: rface
Warning: this is personal opinion: Yes. Go to the function. You do not have to recognize it as a wedding, nor their relationship as being a marriage--and you shouldn't--but you should be there for your family.
80 posted on 03/17/2007 2:20:32 PM PDT by Jedi Master Pikachu ( What is your take on Acts 15:20 (abstaining from blood) about eating meat? Could you freepmail?)
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