Posted on 01/09/2007 12:21:16 PM PST by Paddlefish
About one in three parents in the United States and Canada do not think their methods of disciplining their children work well, according to a U.S. study.
Dr. Shari Barkin, at Tennessee's Monroe Carell Jr. Children's Hospital at Vanderbilt found 31 percent of about 5,000 parents surveyed said they 'never' or 'sometimes' perceived their methods to be effective.
Many of those reported turning into their own parents when it came to discipline, with 38 percent using the same methods their own parents used on them as children.
'It was surprising to see how many parents feel that disciplining their children is ineffective,' Barkin said in a telephone interview.
'Many are using the same techniques their parents used on them but don't think they really work.'
The study, based on a survey of parents through community based doctors in 32 U.S. states, Puerto Rico and Canada, found the most common form of discipline was using time-outs, with 45 percent of parents using this method.
It found 41.5 percent of parents removed privileges, while 13 percent reported yelling at their children, and 8.5 percent reported the use of spanking 'often or always.'
'But we strongly suspect that both yelling and spanking might be underreported,' said Barkin, whose study is published in the January issue of the journal Clinical Pediatrics.
'We know when parents perceive their methods are not working. As a third reported, then emotions can quickly escalate.'
She said by the time children reached the six to 11-year-old age range, parents were about 25 percent less likely to report using time-outs and spanking as they were with younger children.
When children reached school age, parents reported a heavier use of taking away privileges and yelling.
But even in the older age range, perception that the discipline might not be working persisted.
(Excerpt) Read more at lifestyle.monstersandcritics.com ...
100% of violent crime victims wonder if parental discipline isn't such a bad thing.
Somebody call Nanny 911!
As Bender would say: "Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?'
This is news? You only have to go out in public to find this out.
Consistency is key.
That's because their parents read Spock or Summerhill. They need to turn to their grandparents.
Yelling just lets the kids know that they are in charge.
Praise and attention during good behavior is another critical element, IMO.
(Yes, I'm a parent. I even have teenagers!)
Parents (to their child's counselor): "Hey, we've tried nothing... and it hasn't worked!"
Another problem with discipline is that half of children live in a home with no father in it, or perhaps only visit their father two weekends a month. Two parents (one of each gender) in a stable household is the superior "alternative".
Your suggestions are wonderfully clear and right on the money, IMO.
That's funny.
we have the same outlook, and rule as Gene Simmons with raising children "Obey your Mother, Fear your Father". Ours are turning out pretty good. But when we're out we always cringe at some children's behavior.
Exactly.
That is the hardest part because for those who don't have children or who don't get it - children will test you more than once about the exact same thing.
I think too many parents get to the place where they're thinking "how many times do I have to tell them they can't do "x"? and the parent just gives up. Then they have to start over preventing the child from doing "x" or the child simply does "x" from then on.
My daughters know the difference quite well.
They were "disciplined" as often as they needed.
They were corporeally punished very little.
One is 23 with a young family of her own now.
The other is 20 and living on her own.
I'm proud of both.
Ya think this might not work?
As I used to tell my friends. " Children tend to listen when they know you can order a cattle prod by mail and have it delivered overnight"
Todays parents are stupid and lazy and selfish.Todays parents never had discipline themselves so are unqualified to judge.In their defense,even if they wanted to invoke discipline the courts,cops and social workers would have them thrown in jail.Since when is it constitutional for the courts or anyone else to tell you how to raise a family?
YEP...."Consistency"......when my son was young....when I said "NO" he KNEW I meant it! And, I don't remember spanking him...except maybe a little swat once or twice when he was under 2.
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