Posted on 12/23/2006 5:15:33 PM PST by Dallas59
BANGKOK (AFP) - "I could not find anybody in the States. There was nothing in America for me. That's why I'm here," says the clean-cut 52-year-old bachelor, who bears a passing resemblance to Hollywood actor Michael Douglas.
Sullivan, an emergency nurse from Florida, is one of a growing number of foreign men seeking young and beautiful Thai brides via the Internet.
Speaking at the Bangkok office of Sweet Singles, a Thai bride-by-Internet company, Sullivan says he has decided to "go beyond boundaries" in his search for a wife after a futile quest in the United States.
"American women in my age are, basically, a wreck. They are physically and emotionally beaten up from relationships and life. They are untrusting," says the well-built Sullivan, sporting a pink shirt and white pants.
"I think the feminist movement in America in the 60s really trashed American feminism. American women lack a certain femininity about them that women of other countries have," he laughs.
Sullivan contacted Sweet Singles six months ago and was introduced to Yoshita Tongsalee, an attractive 27-year-old teacher of traditional Thai dancing.
After corresponding with her via e-mails for three weeks, Sullivan decided to meet her and flew to Bangkok in early December.
"Just from e-mails, I knew she was the one. I just knew," says the American, his emerald earring dazzling.
"I find Thai women in general to be less self-centered and more family-centered than I find in western women," he says. The couple plans to marry next year.
John, a 43-year-old Briton who got married to a Thai woman four years ago via an Internet bride agency, also has grievances about western women.
"English women are very demanding and they expect you to be good-looking and have plenty of money and give them lots of attention. They drink a lot and they smoke a lot and they eat a lot," says John, who declined to give his last name.
"I am not very good at getting women anyway. I'm not the best-looking guy in the world. I'm quite short and it's very hard for me to find an English woman who is shorter than me," he says on the telephone from London.
Before marrying his Thai bride, John dated six British women, but his relationships with them were anything but happy.
"I'm just fed up with British women. They are not so loyal," he says.
When he met six Thai ladies in Bangkok via the Internet, including a 32-year-old business woman who later became his wife, John says he was struck by their kindness and family-centered values.
"I think Thai women are more loyal to their husbands. They are not just 'take, take take.' Also they have old-fashioned family values, which we used to have in this country," he says. John and his wife now have two young boys.
John and Marc declined to say how much they paid to get their Thai wives. Sweet Singles says it can charge a foreign man up to 1,700 dollars for a three-year membership to meet Thai ladies.
Some 10,000 foreign men have signed up with Sweet Singles over the last decade, and nearly half of them were previously divorced, says Bee, the company's customer service manager.
Some 80 percent of them get married to Thai women through the agency.
Americans account for 60 percent of the company's male clients, with the rest mostly from Australia, Britain, Germany and Scandinavian countries. Their average age ranges from 55 to 60.
Some 20,000 Thai women have also joined Sweet Singles, with their ages ranging from 20 to 40. The company charges a Thai woman 700 baht (20 dollars) for membership.
Bee, a petite 40-something, says Thai woman often have a favorable impression of foreigners.
"Many Thai girls were disappointed by Thai men who are famous for womanizing, drinking and gambling. Thai woman believe Caucasian men are more responsible and sincere and not playing around with other women," she says.
Thanitchaya Buaban, a striking 26-year-old beauty from Thailand's northern tourist spot of Chiang Mai, says she used to have a Thai boyfriend but he cheated on her many times.
"I was heart-broken. After I joined Sweet Singles, I started meeting foreigners and they were very kind and polite," she says at the firm's office.
Thanitchaya says she now has many American suitors who are trying to win her love with diamond rings and necklaces.
"I'm going to choose the best one," she says with a big smile.
For Sullivan's fiancee Yoshita, her experiences with Thai men were more traumatic.
"I was planning to marry my first Thai boyfriend, but he did not show up on our wedding day. He embarrassed me and my family," Yoshita says. "My second boyfriend cheated on me and impregnated another woman."
But Yoshita, who wears a golden heart necklace, says she is looking forward to living in Florida with the man of her dreams -- even if she still refers to him by his last name.
"I believe Mr Sullivan is a gift from God. He is really a good man and respects me. Every day I pray and thank Buddha for giving me Mr Sullivan," she says.
Sullivan nodded and held her hand.
"I have to step outside my own culture to find someone with whom I am compatible. I am not narrow-minded in that regard," he smiles.
Hi! Hope you are well tonight! This thread has gone to h@@ll in a handbasket, so I'm thinking of starting a new thread for holiday chat. Give me about 5, and I should have it up.
Well, that would fit in with my comment that anyone who spends real money on socks is an idiot. :-)
Perhaps the LDS had too strong an influence on your "mennonites" way out there. Any polygamy?
Okay, that's a third caveat: no holes, no dirt, and if you hike or run, you may buy the heavy expensive socks ONLY for those purposes. But no expensive socks for work or for regular play.
My reading skills aren't so good, as you pointed out. I missed where he did this, so I don't know if he was validating himself with it the way you were.
Your only child son never stabbed his sister in the eye with a pencil.
Two kids can get in much more trouble together than any 10 single kids can.
,,, really? Mr Sullivan just made a choice, that's all.
A strong and smart woman, as many of the Thais are, can maintain at least an equal position in the marriage without getting confrontational and in-your-face. it's only western feminists who think femininity equates with passivity. Asians know better.
Yeah? Marry one, get back to me.
You're saying Thai women have the ability to maneuver within the relationship, an art that Western women lost?
What does that verse have to do with anything?
Here was the post (post #125) of Cogadh's that made me respond in kind:
"Hmmm: Hot (american) wife, couple kids, engineering degree, real estate, big paycheck and 16 years in the Nat. Guard....Yeah, pathetic...."
Dont be silly, of course there isnt any polygamy. THe arranged marriage only came about if a man hadnt been married by a certain age, roughly thirty is my guess. WHen I was 17 I rode out to a town near Modesto where we picked up the woman who was about 18, when she returned she married the suitor. This was all arranged as it was certain that he was never going to marry a girl around town. They had never met before. You know as well as me that alot of marriages are pushed when people are younger and they get rushed into the marriage, this was just a different way of doing it. I will also say its been 16 years and they are still very happily married.
ALso you realize there are different groups of Mennonites that choose to follow varying levels of technology and live to the scriptures slightly different, heck I didnt know about lower German until I found my grandmothers old bible in the attic.
To be honest with you, and I don't know why this is (mother smoking during pregnancy, social influence of feminism, growing up without a father, air-borne toxins or what) but a certain generation of men and women seem to have a large percentage of some sort of Axis 2 personality disorders. Narcissism, paranoia, etc. Not enought to be "mentally ill" but enough to make them dysfunctional in relationships. To listen to most people talk of their troubled relationships, much of the problem seems to be complete selfishness that they don't realize they have.
Are you married to a liberal woman?
I've been married to the same lady so long now that if anything happened to end our marriage, I doubt I'd be in the market for another marriage.
Can you get mail order mistresses?
The really funny part is your average 110 lb Thai woman could easily take out a western woman twice her size in a fight. The people posting on here really have no idea who vicious Asian women can be.
Agreed. You may have heard Bill Cosby's comment that parents of only children don't count as real parents for the reason you stated. I will say that if I had two like him at the same time, I would probably be in my grave already. :)
,,, exactly why guys do the sums first that they never used to. If women want money, they should have it themselves or be prepared to work for it to the level they desire. FeMANism has made men products of their environment... it's it and that's that. Option B: catch a plane to another country for a shift in values and better selection. Outsourcing made easy.
That was not funny
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