Posted on 02/21/2006 5:58:36 AM PST by Neville72
My Choice
Minister's abortion two decades ago was a difficult decision that still resonates with a sense of loss - but it was a mature choice and the right one
By The Rev. Donna Schaper
I am a 58-year-old white woman. I had an abortion 19 years ago. I am not bragging, nor am I apologizing.
I am a mother of three children in their 20s, and I am an ordained Christian minister. I had one child and then twins. Having twins the second time caused me my great good fortune of having three children in diapers. While nursing the twins, I did not think I needed birth control. I was wrong.
When I got pregnant with the child I call "Alma," which means soul, I was not interested in a fourth child. I chose, with some searching, to exercise my constitutional right and ended her birth.
Why do I tell my story now? Because I fear that abortion rights may become even more restricted than they already are. I also find the very intimidation that I experience in telling my story to be the reason I must speak. Why would I be afraid? Because anti-abortion people like to punish people into their version of morality. Plus my editor warned me to expect a lot of heat. Should that fear replace free speech? I think not.
I did what was right for me, for my family, for my work, for my husband and for my three children. I happen to agree that abortion is a form of murder. I think the quarrel about when life begins is disrespectful to the fetus. I know I murdered the life within me. I could have loved that life but chose not to.
I did what I think men do all the time when they take us to war: They choose violence because, although they believe it is bad, it is still better than the alternatives. The "just war" theory assumes that human beings get caught in terrible choices all the time. This freedom is not just for men; it is for women also.
When I made my choice to end one life on behalf of other life, I was terribly troubled. I was in a double bind. I prayed and anguished. Then I made a choice. Adults make choices.
I have long thought that the drama of the abortion battle was not about unborn babies at all. Instead, it is about women and sex and about women and maturity. We are considered babies, sub-adults, in need of supervision over our sexuality. Otherwise we are dangerous. The virgin/whore debates come to mind.
When I made my choice to end life, I was behaving as an adult. I did not shrink from the responsibility of making a choice. I did not ask someone else to make it for me. And I certainly did not request my government's help in my bedroom. Instead, I behaved as an adult who is also a sexual being. Things happen sexually between people that are not always controllable. The unprotected sex I had with my husband while nursing our twins had a consequence that neither of us desired. It was a human life. That's why we named her, wept for her, wanted her but also knew we did not want her enough.
Because women are mature sexual beings who make choices, birth control and abortion are positive moral forces in history. They allow sex to be both procreational and recreational, for men and for women. That is good news, even though most of the world doesn't know it yet. In Africa, for example, too many men assume the freedom to have unprotected sex with women, giving them AIDS and heartbreak. What does our so-called pro-life government recommend? Abstinence! Such a recommendation is immoral to its core.
Obviously, protected sex is the most moral thing of all. Unprotected sex is adolescent, immature, sometimes life-threatening and always stupid. Women are mature enough to handle that. We are not babies. Sometimes, in the battle over killing our babies, I hear the echo of people wanting to kill women's maturity and sexuality. I don't like it. That's why I am breaking my silence about who I am.
I am a 58-year-old sexual, mature woman. That's who I am. I had an abortion. I am not bragging and I am not apologizing.
Abortion that is legal, safe and rare is the best policy conceivable for men and women and for mature, moral sexuality.
The Rev. Donna Schaper is senior minister of Judson Memorial Church in Manhattan.
I took deep breath and googled the church
http://www.judson.org/war.htm
They have an "activism" area, need I say more?
Go to the church site to learn more. You will not be surprised.
This woman is one of the reasons why Christians get a bad name. I'm not sure what book she is teaching in at her "church", but it's not the Good Book. Her little story is full of pride and a serious lack of shame and guilt for the murder of her child. How hard would it have been to put the child up for adoption; instead she chose murder and now wants to stand at her pulpit and tell everyone around her to continue in their sin and murder their children. I will pray for her salvation because she does not know our Lord Jesus.
But, they serve Fair Trade coffee at coffee hour...
I went there and she makes me very glad that I go to a Southern Baptist Church. Plain out politics.
"I happen to agree that abortion is a form of murder"
This is much more disturbing to hear than the usual excuse that it is only tissue and not a human until birth. She knew she was committing murder.
Hmm, Jesus is mentioned 3 times in passing, but this "Judson" dude must really be someone special there.
This idiot is beyond vile because as a *minister* others look up to her for guidance. On the positive side I do give her credit for having three children when so many are have fewer and none
I don't get it. If war is wrong, then how can she justify abortion by comparing it to war? Wouldn't that make abortion wrong, too? Of course, it's not about logic, it's about feelings.
ping
She is so full of herself. Does she not even wonder what God ordained for her that she selfishly refused?
Yeah, she's deeply confused. But worse, she is by her own confession a murderer. And worse yet, she sees this war on the unborn as a "just war," on par with the WoT or WWII. The "War to Get Laid," I guess you could call it.
Nope, my mind's still reeling.
Sick Reverend. I'll pray for Alma, I'm not a good enough Christian to pray for the Reverend but I hope she comes to know that murder for convenience is not soemthing Jesus would cast a vote for.
When I made my choice to end one life on behalf of other life, I was terribly troubled. I was in a double bind. I prayed and anguished. Then I made a choice. Adults make choices.
"...end one life on behalf of other life,..."
This lady ought to be an shyster attorney instead. Let's call it what it is, the "ending of one life for the convenience, selfishness, and vocational expedience of another."
I pity the man that is married to this fool.
Pro-Life Ping.
This feminazi who claims to be a minister, still had one of her children butchered because it would be inconvenient, but she went ahead and "named" her victim. This woman is completely evil on so many different levels.
"Alma"? This woman makes my skin crawl. She's a minister, she has an abortion, and she's not sorry for it? Good luck to her when she meets her Maker. How is she going to rationalize killing the child in her womb with her work as a so-called sheperd of God's children?
I wonder if she knows what "mea culpa, mea culpa, maxima mea culpa" means?
May I suggest that, given the right time and opportunity, you suggest to the friend or his wife that she contact CareNet or SaveOne or a local crisis pregnancy center. Many organizations offer post-abortion healing programs which include, among other things, the opportunity to forgive oneself. That is the hardest part.
Prayers for her and her family.
Excuse me, I might have misunderstood you: you say they baptize the unborn--- after an abortion? They baptize the dead body, or what's left of it? Please explain, I'm sure I must have misunerstood.
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