Where's Osama, Zawahiri?

Amiright.com ^ | 01/07/2006 | Sarcastic Paranoid

[Parody]

"Who's Your Daddy?" Based on the performance by Toby Keith
"Where's Osama?" Parody by Sarcastic Paranoid

Have you noticed that Zawahiri does all the talking for al-Qaeda these days and Osama hasn't said anything since 2004? Logically, given these two facts as premises, what is the most valid and highly probable conclusion we can draw?

Oh, there you are, you whore Zawahiri,
On al-Jazeera spewing lies.
You celebrate with Moore and Sheehan when a soldier dies.

Yeah, you've lost your mind, look like crap, now you're squirming in our trap
And al-Qaeda's in a bind,
What happened to that dork Osama? Was he cramping your style?

He's mad as a filthy dog with rabies;
Don't you get it?
Osama's long since lost out to Dubya.
He knows about it, won't admit it!

Where's Osama, Zawahiri?
Can you prove he isn't dead?
Over in Multan,
They said his life was through
When the earth started rumbling.

He's not so well now:
He's down in Hell now!
Now, was that really what he planned?
Where's your hope now, Zawahiri,
Since bin Laden has flat-scanned?

You mark my words: Osama's pushing up daisies.
Don't you forget it!
We haven't heard from him in over a year now.
Osama bit it! Come on, admit it!

Where's Osama, Zawahiri?
Can you prove he isn't dead?
You're gonna be dead,
And all your allies too,
With all those smart bombs now tumbling!

You're such a dummy!
Run to your mummy!
When are you fleeing to Iran?
Have you considered hara-kiri?
Zawahiri, what's your plan?

Have you considered hara-kiri?
Zawahiri, what's your plan?

It's not too early to start wondering about Zarqawi, either.

[Parody]

I don't think I'm the only one who's noticed that the chances of Osama's non-viability are rapidly approaching 100%

[Jaxter]

He's dead Jim.

[Brilliant]

I noticed this about 3 videotapes back. If Osama is afraid to talk because he doesn't want us to know he's still alive, then why does Zawahiri make a video saying he's still alive?

[newcthem]

Nah.........just saving his voice for Very Important announcements. Like nominating the next Democratic candidate for president.

[NerdDad]

You did see the NRO article by Ledeen this morning didn't you? Says his sources in Iran told him OBL died in mid-December.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1554560/posts

[LayoutGuru2]

Zawahri's Christmas Greeting

A very special Christmas greeting from Ayman to all of you, via Scrappleface.

(Video player requires Flash Player.)